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Posted

I'm reaching out to my LS family.

I feel some nostalgia as 15 years ago today I was with him, we were coworkers and the whole building was sent home and I walked home with him as the traffic was too crazy to get home from the city at that point and he lived downtown.

It was so eerie and weird. We were very platonic then. We walked to his home on shock and silence.

I remember us telling eachother many times over the years no matter where we were in life, we would check in with each other to remember this day.

I'm of course not going to reach out.

So ironic 15 years is the amount of time we were friends and its the 9/11 15 Year anniversary.

Healing continues to happen and progress is being made with over 5 solid months strict NC I have bad days now and again, but overall sooooooo much better.

I'm going to keep going.

Wishes for all of your continued healing.

?

  • Like 8
Posted

I understand it's hard but tbh watching the 9/11 memorial service has put all this into perspective for me.

 

Am I really going to waste my life which could end at anytime on mm? Hell no

 

Yes you can feel said you were with him that day or you can spin it - so many people lost so much that day is walking home with someone really that important?

 

I don't know. We all process it differently. But do you really want to be thinking of him on every 9/11 anniversary?

  • Like 9
  • Author
Posted
I understand it's hard but tbh watching the 9/11 memorial service has put all this into perspective for me.

 

Am I really going to waste my life which could end at anytime on mm? Hell no

 

Yes you can feel said you were with him that day or you can spin it - so many people lost so much that day is walking home with someone really that important?

 

I don't know. We all process it differently. But do you really want to be thinking of him on every 9/11 anniversary?

 

I love your perspective so much better.

  • Like 2
Posted

I'm sorry privategal it makes sense that it would be a triggery day for you.

  • Author
Posted
I'm sorry privategal it makes sense that it would be a triggery day for you and what a traumatic experience that you were there at ground zero.

 

Thank you, I think I only just need to stay strong through all the 1sts and anniversaries ie. 1st summer not being friends, 1st no birthday greeting, 1st 9/11 NC.

I think I am out of the woods as far as fog lifting, not romanticizing or pain shopping as much.

I'm soft hearted and its when some forgiveness and starting to come out of the anger phase is happening then once in awhile I think fondly now, that's a dangerous place, as it's when I've stumbled and reached back out in the past.

Not this time. I'm never to return to that friendship.

It's a new chapter and hopefully today will make me stronger being able to remember such a powerful historic day and not reach out.

The old me might have used it as an excuse.

The new me wants to stay in NC forever and eventually have less memories all together.

  • Like 3
Posted

I don't mean what you went through didn't matter I just mean try and think of it in a different way

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
I don't mean what you went through didn't matter I just mean try and think of it in a different way

 

If you saw where I came from...suicidal, antidepressants...I think you'd see I've come a LONG way thanks.

Posted

just hugs, all around.

 

(((((((((((LS)))))))))))))

 

and an extra one for you (((((((PG )))))))

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
just hugs, all around.

 

(((((((((((LS)))))))))))))

 

and an extra one for you (((((((PG )))))))

 

Awe thank you Love, LS is so lucky to have you!! Hugs back!

Posted

I was watching a documentary on 9/11 and it said that a lot of relationships and marriages ended following the tragedy (as little as 4 days later), because everyone started realising that life was too short and wanting more out of life than an unhappy relationship.

 

It does put things into perspective.

  • Like 4
Posted
I was watching a documentary on 9/11 and it said that a lot of relationships and marriages ended following the tragedy (as little as 4 days later), because everyone started realising that life was too short and wanting more out of life than an unhappy relationship.

 

It does put things into perspective.

 

Yup. I was there and I would leave my abusive ex husband the following summer. I gave him my money, my car and all our possessions to get him to sign. I packed what I could carry, walked out the door and never went back.

  • Like 2
  • Author
Posted
Yup. I was there and I would leave my abusive ex husband the following summer. I gave him my money, my car and all our possessions to get him to sign. I packed what I could carry, walked out the door and never went back.

 

I too left my marriage with just a trash bags, no money, gave up the house, didn't ask for one thing but my freedom. Thank you MB and Grey Coudersport.

I have SOOOO many EXACT similarities to both your stories and always have love your insights.

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