nicetomeetu Posted July 6, 2005 Posted July 6, 2005 I met my bf about 10 months ago while on vacation. We really hit it off, he wanted a LD relationship, which I was a bit nervous about because I have never done this. I decided to try it, and so far it has been great. We chat all the time (phone and online), send letters, and visit about once every month or so. We are in different countries. He is American, I am Canadian. We need to fly over just to see each other but it always seems worth it when we do. He is willing to move, I am open to it, but unsure. (because of my career) The problem is, I really don't know what to do from this point. We can not live in each other's country (longer than a few months) unless one of us becomes like a rocket scientist, or we get married. It's pretty much that simple. So what do people do next? I mean, like how do we get to know each other better in person, etc? Like so that maybe sometime we can eventually get married. Is anyone, or has anyone been in the same boat? Any advice please!
Zaira Posted July 6, 2005 Posted July 6, 2005 It will be difficult, there is no denying that. Why not spend those few months you can together, and see how it goes. Do you think you may want to spend the rest of your life with him?
Author nicetomeetu Posted July 6, 2005 Author Posted July 6, 2005 well, yeah in a way it's been hard, but I am so busy that if even he lived next door I really wouldn't have much time to see him anyway, to be honest. The thing is, I don't mind it much right now. We do alot of things that I think many couples never get to do, and we really appreciate and enjoy time spent together. It is alot of fun. I don't ever think I have been this happy in a relaionship in many ways. Also, our relationship is also NOT based on things like sex. We spend most of the time having fun, talking, etc, which is kinda rare in alot of relationships. We just enjoy each other's company. We also trust each other alot (and for me this is rare to trust so much even when a guy does live next door) I do see myself being with him, but I mean, how could I decide this without having a NORMAL relationship first? I just don't think it's possible though without the words "i do". And I am pretty sure I would have to leave my job to live there for a few months.
Zaira Posted July 6, 2005 Posted July 6, 2005 You are enjoying things as they are, which is good. I mean, being closer may actually ruin it. Although, that is what you're trying to find out, isn't it? Maybe he could move up and live near (NOT with!) you for those few months. You'd have a much better idea then I think.
Author nicetomeetu Posted July 6, 2005 Author Posted July 6, 2005 yes, but you see, that's where the problem is. you can not work in Canada or the United states without a work visa. It is almost impossible for him to live here for a few months on his own. Also, in order to do that, one of us would have to leave our career. So this is where it gets confusing, and decisions are hard to make. Has anyone been in a similar situation?
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