fluidian Posted September 6, 2016 Posted September 6, 2016 The title says it all - I've been dating a great person for just over 1.5 years and we're in our 30s. Things seem to be great, and we both want marriage at some point - at what point do we sit down and talk about it and what does that conversation look like? It seems to me like now! But I wanted to get some thoughts as I've heard things like, "wait 2 years", or, "if you're still in the honeymoon phase, you can't know if you love them", and all that kind of stuff. yeah - I'm still a bit googly-eyed, but the clock for both of us is ticking - we've also both been around the block enough to know that we work at least pretty well together. I'd love to hear your stories and thoughts - what happened to you, what did you do, or what would be your ideal situation.
Ami1uwant Posted September 6, 2016 Posted September 6, 2016 There isn't a time line before you decide...like waiting 2 yrs. The things to look at are: 1. How are you when you stay over each other's places? Are you living together now? Has this been talked shout if not? 2. Long term outlook...do you two want the same things in terms of children, where you were ll live in terms of city or country or inner city or suburb? 3. How much common interests do you have? You need to share some interests otherwise it can split you apart. You should not have to sacrifice something you love to do for someone you love. 4. What are the problem areas in the relationship? 5. How is the sex? 6. What is the ideal spouse...what do they meet or lack in that ideal, snd how important is it to you? 7. Look long and hard at some of the quirks they have...can you accept it or will it be like chalk screech on a board in a few years even though it may be tolerable now.
Author fluidian Posted September 6, 2016 Author Posted September 6, 2016 Amazing - get eat questions: 1. We spend maybe 4 nights together/week and it's pretty great and comfortable. We haven't talked about living together. 2. I think we're on the same page for kids and location. 3. There are enough shared interests and enough freedom and encouragement to pursue non-shared interest. 4. I have a hard time finding problem areas -we've both been I the dating scene for a while and it's hard to see major issues. 5. Se is ok - but could be better/more frequent 6. They meet the essential spouse criteria - some minor details could be better, but they aren't a real issue - even 99% of perfection can be improved upon - I happy with them as they are...a feat combination of requirements and not many could be improved upon a 7. I think the issues will be tolerable - things could be fixed, but I don't see the becoming an issue as they stand today...
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