Ilovelifeforwhatcome Posted September 5, 2016 Posted September 5, 2016 So I am debating if I want to do this, I think I'm more afraid of what people will think. I have dated guys in my vicinity and other then 1 serious relationship, I have yet to find someone I click w/. I met this guy online (we have been talking for a month), at 1st I didn't think anything of it, but once we started skyping, I really clicked w/him. We spend hours talking on skype and text back and forth everyday. He doesn't have the means to come out and see me, since I am flexible, I am planning to go out and see him. I fly in for a day (he lives in another city) and fly out that night. We were planning on going to an amusement park and no time during this meet will I be alone w/just him. Opinions?
CarrieT Posted September 5, 2016 Posted September 5, 2016 If it is just for the day, I don't see a big deal about it - especially since it is just for a day. Don't spend the night! The bigger question would be how you might see it long term... He doesn't have the means to visit you; how often would you be spending money to see him? 2
angel.eyes Posted September 5, 2016 Posted September 5, 2016 What do you mean, he doesn't have the means to come see you??? Why is he seeking LDRs if he can't afford to see them. That has red flags written all over it! Anyway, if this date works out, are you planning to fly to his city each and every time you have a date? Would you move there? Are you planning to support him. Remember, his best foot forward is "I don't have the 'means' to see you for our first date!" He warned you. 4
BaileyB Posted September 5, 2016 Posted September 5, 2016 I would think that you would be safe to meet him in a public place. But, I too would be concerned about how this will work long term. I know that I would not want a long distance relationship. I would not have the money to fly back and forth often. And, I would be concerned that you may be investing more (literally) into the relationship than him. I understand how frustrating dating can be and why you would tempted to meet him. But, I don't know that it's a great idea - long term. Just remember... You may think that you know him because you've seen him on skype and texted for a month. But, until you meet him... You really don't know him. And even then, you get to know someone in the months of dating you spend... Together. Starting a long distance relationship makes this really, really hard... 1
Bialy Posted September 5, 2016 Posted September 5, 2016 Unless you plan on relocating to his city for a job or school or something, there's no point to pursuing a LDR. They're expensive and you don't know him at all. It's not like he's someone you already know in real life, like an old friend or a former neighbor or something. He's a total stranger. It's really not worth the expense and energy, IMO. 1
Author Ilovelifeforwhatcome Posted September 5, 2016 Author Posted September 5, 2016 Unless you plan on relocating to his city for a job or school or something, there's no point to pursuing a LDR. They're expensive and you don't know him at all. It's not like he's someone you already know in real life, like an old friend or a former neighbor or something. He's a total stranger. It's really not worth the expense and energy, IMO. Depending on how compatible we are, I would be willing to relocate. I have finished my degree and I have a profession.
BaileyB Posted September 5, 2016 Posted September 5, 2016 That is a long way down the road though. Be sure not to rush it, take your time getting to know this person and do your due diligence. No doubt, it will be a very expensive thing. Just, be cautious...
leogirl876 Posted September 5, 2016 Posted September 5, 2016 I honestly don't understand why people bother doing the LDR from the beginning. It's one thing if you dated for a long time and you got a job transfer, but to start out that way is totally different. Plus this guy said he doesn't have the means to travel to you, so you'd be spending all your money. Red flags many times over. I wouldn't go see him! Honestly, if I was going to do the LDR, the guy would have to come see me first, not me going to see him.
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