How can I keep him interested?

[DarkRebel92]

So I met a guy from an online dating site. I know it was a wrong move but I was the one who asked him first to meet up with me because I really wanna see him and wanted to know if I would like him in person. I had to do that because I had to leave the next day. We are currently about 6 hours apart from each other.

 

During that night, we spent an hour and a half talking with as little awkwardness possible. It felt so good because he was so honest and we were both able to open up about things. The second half of the night, however, was spent making out and saying that we like each other. We wanted to give it a try but we can't because of our distance. He even said that he doesn't consider that night as a date because he would like to formally take me out on a date. This was the very first time I ever met with someone and I don't know if it was too fast but we reached third base.

 

After that night, he texted me right away to thank me for hanging out with him. We continued texting but now I don't know if that will go on. I think I said really something wrong because I tried talking to him about the possiblity of a relationship and that I don't want to lose him that easily. I don't know if I should blame myself for hoping but he did say that he might be going to my place in the near future.

 

The day after I asked him to supposedly be my date on our grad ball, he was the one who texted first. After that, I've always been the one who has to initiate the texting because he's always busy at work though he said that we can always continue texting. But just recently, I felt like I've been trying to chase him so hard that he's just trying to entertain me or be nice to me. Starting today, I made a deal with myself that I won't text him for a week to see if he'd miss me and text me for that reason.

 

Should I still hope for the possibility of a relationship with him? Should I believe all the promising things he said that night or was it just a guy thing that guys do to get a girl? Did I lose something because I let him reach the third base during our first meeting? I hope someone can help me out with this because it's been bothering me seriously. I know I should just keep myself busy and go on with my life but it's just so hard.

[somecamel]

Imagine you were a fly on the wall and you just read what you wrote as someone else.

 

I'm sorry but he got his oats and has already moved on.

 

Some guys will entertain the idea of relationship talk on the first date because they know that if they agree it's a sure fire way of getting the goods.

 

Personally, I'd move on and find someone else. The chances are with the distance alone this was never going to amount to anything.

[angel.eyes]

Agreed!

 

If the six-hour distance makes it impossible to date, then this was a non-starter from the get go. I'm not sure why you ever bothered to meet him.

 

At any rate, he could tell you whatever you wanted to hear and make as many promises as you needed that night because he knew he wouldn't be held to them. You were leaving the next day anyway, and he had zippo intention of traveling six hours to see you again.

[Miss Peach]

I agree with the others that he was already getting out his defense which was you live too far away. But a lot of men like to be 'good guys' and they tell women what sounds good rather than be direct. I bet in his mind the far away excuse was his explanation. The fact that it's you initiating all the texting just confirms this for me as it seems the effort is mis-balanced if he were really wanting to be with you.

 

I know this may not be what you want to hear but he's going to be a match of he won't be. You want him to want to be with the real you. You don't want to twist yourself into a pretzel to keep a guy.

[Gr8fuln2020]

OP, it won't happen. A relationship with this guy, that is. The distance is what is keeping this to be a viable reality and a way out for this guy. Sorry.

[Redhead14]

So I met a guy from an online dating site. I know it was a wrong move but I was the one who asked him first to meet up with me because I really wanna see him and wanted to know if I would like him in person. I had to do that because I had to leave the next day. We are currently about 6 hours apart from each other.

 

During that night, we spent an hour and a half talking with as little awkwardness possible. It felt so good because he was so honest and we were both able to open up about things. The second half of the night, however, was spent making out and saying that we like each other. We wanted to give it a try but we can't because of our distance. He even said that he doesn't consider that night as a date because he would like to formally take me out on a date. This was the very first time I ever met with someone and I don't know if it was too fast but we reached third base.

 

After that night, he texted me right away to thank me for hanging out with him. We continued texting but now I don't know if that will go on. I think I said really something wrong because I tried talking to him about the possiblity of a relationship and that I don't want to lose him that easily. I don't know if I should blame myself for hoping but he did say that he might be going to my place in the near future.

 

The day after I asked him to supposedly be my date on our grad ball, he was the one who texted first. After that, I've always been the one who has to initiate the texting because he's always busy at work though he said that we can always continue texting. But just recently, I felt like I've been trying to chase him so hard that he's just trying to entertain me or be nice to me. Starting today, I made a deal with myself that I won't text him for a week to see if he'd miss me and text me for that reason.

 

Should I still hope for the possibility of a relationship with him? Should I believe all the promising things he said that night or was it just a guy thing that guys do to get a girl? Did I lose something because I let him reach the third base during our first meeting? I hope someone can help me out with this because it's been bothering me seriously. I know I should just keep myself busy and go on with my life but it's just so hard.

 

Should I still hope for the possibility of a relationship with him? -- You are way ahead of yourself here, aren't you? I would start with hoping that he actually wants to set up another date and comes see you 6 hours away . . .

 

If that were to happen a couple of times, then I might start thinking about possible relationship.

 

Anytime you sleep with a man fast, you should assume it will be a one-night stand unless he shows you otherwise. He's not showing any signs that this isn't the case with you.

 

Don't text or chase him in anyway anymore.

[Satu]

You can't make anyone think, feel, or do anything.

 

People do what they do because of who they are.

 

What happens between two people, is what their nature and character dictates, and allows.

 

Once you really get that, its very liberating.

 

 

Take care.