lvgrl Posted July 5, 2005 Posted July 5, 2005 Ok, so my guy friend and this girl have been together I would say about...a good 8 years. He decided that he was going to move 4 states away, he planned on moving on the 20th of this month.. So she is headed over to see him yesterday, and she gets there to find a note on the door.. "Be back for the rest of my stuff in about a month" So, he left 15 days early and didnt say anything to her about it, being with someone for 8 years and then all the sudden they up and walk. I dont have a clue what to tell her, other than the friend advice..But that would just be hard to go through.. Any ideas on why or what I can do.. Oh yeah keep in mind they had a really good relationship, so good that he asked her to marry him about 2 weeks ago, and she is prego with his son. SO, I dont know..
ReluctantRomeo Posted July 5, 2005 Posted July 5, 2005 Unless there is some way out explanation (for example, he's a secret agent and was suddenly called away... hmmm even that doesn't work without him saying first), he's a commitmentphobe. And an utter bastard. All you can do is be sympathetic. Let her cry, rant or just be confused. Whatever she needs. If you can contact your guy friend and talk him down, that would help too.
lvgrl Posted July 5, 2005 Posted July 5, 2005 mmm, see I did call him today and asked him why the hell he would just up and leave.. And his wonderful excuse (if I might add, made me laugh) was that it was just time for him to move on with his life and forget his past.. What the hell kind of exuse is that? It would be one thing if she werent expecting a child, but he didnt just leave her when he did that. He left his child. So, he becomes like all the other deadbeat dads in this world who can sure have the sex but cant handle the effects of it. I just dont think running was a good option for him. Problems dont just fall off the earth when you move, they move with you..Just a new location but nothing will change for him. And thats sad to see someones life that way.
d'Arthez Posted July 5, 2005 Posted July 5, 2005 Running away does not make the responsibilities disappear. He still is a father to the child. And if she decides she needs child support, things could get a bit tricky. Not to mention when the child is 18 and might suddenly come up to knock on his door. How to explain the new Mrs, assuming he finds one? Of course his psychological problems will remain in existence - chances are the same thing might occur again. As for his now-ex, she is left behind with their child. She is definitively deserving of all the support she can get.
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