Scottyboyy Posted September 1, 2016 Posted September 1, 2016 In the beginning of the year things ended with a 3.5 year relationship. It took me quite some time to gain self esteem and confidence again. I took the past 6-7 months or so, to work on myself. It is true for me that the most important relationship to have is with one's self first. Once that is in place, I believe, that the sky is the limit in all relationships in life. Whether they are romantic, platonic, family, co- workers, etc. After learning to be alone, mending old friendships, and spending lots of time with my loved ones I entered back into the dating world 6 weeks ago. I met this wonderful woman online, and since then we have been out 8 times or so. The meetings started out as causal dinners, and this past Sunday we spent whole day together, and she ended up coming inside to meet my parents at the end. It was the first time she has ever met a guys parents. Some red flags have definitely been going on in my head. She will be 28 and has never had a boyfriend. She has merely "dated" and most of the guys end up ghosting her, or tell her that they arent interested after around 3-4 months. We haven't slept together yet, but we kiss and touch each other endlessly when we are together. She insists on moving slow. This is the slowest I have ever moved, usually I would have slept with the woman I am seeing weeks ago. I can certainly view this as positive since i am doing the opposite of what I have always done, since that never worked out in the past lol. She also doesnt seem as emotional as me, in terms of being able to communicate all the time. She does tell me she likes me very much, enjoys spending time, etc. She invited me to a wedding where she is a bridesmaid, and i invited her to my cousins wedding. She also would talk about future plans for the holidays and upcoming trips. The past few days the conversation via texts has been slightly convoluted. She is moving out from home and trying to live in the same town where i do, strictly a coincidence before we met. She went to see it on tuesday and we talked a little that morning and i wished her luck and to let me know. She said she would and never got back to me. So 24 hours passed and i decided to message her to see how it went and to also tell her that i bought the tickets for the movie last night. She said she was fine, flirted a little and sent a picture of her new hair style. That brings us to last night, where there was some tension. I asked her what was going on and why she had been acting a little weird, and she responded with that i was acting weird asking her if everything was okay. I was a little taken back, this is a normal thing to ask. She is very inexperienced with relationships and i am not. After the movie i told her that i felt uneasy, and she said i had nothing to worry about and that i look to deeply into things. There is pressure and lets let things happen as they come. She seems to be in fear of commitment from previously being hurt. No one is going to get hurt, i care for her and want to date her. I like her a lot. We connect on all levels and she is so kind and caring. We hugged, made out, and i said bye. This time she didnt text me that she got home safe so i texted her and she said "Yeah! thanks for the movie it was a good one" We said goodnight and that was it. I dont know what to think anymore. Maybe i am overthinking everything. Maybe she is just moving so slow i cannot handle it. In the end, this one might be very much worth the effort. Shes such a good girl, and she is so beautiful and smart. I am doing my best here, just being myself
smackie9 Posted September 1, 2016 Posted September 1, 2016 There has been a thread started by a lady who is about her age, never had a BF, dated a little and was a virgin. She had a lot of anxiety about being in a relaiotnship and wondered how to handle it. She wanted to hold off on sex until the relationship got serious that it would be leading to marriage. I'm guessing she realized waiting for marriage would delete any chance of a man sticking around. She just didn't know how to or when to broach the subject with her new fella. They have been on about 8 dates, and he has asked her about sex as told him she wanted to take things slow. I know she fears he is just going to probably say no thanks and walk. I have a feeling this might be the case with your lady. Maybe she has never been with a man, and wants to wait but is afraid to say anything. You are just going to have that conversation to put her at ease, and to ask for exclusivity or where you are at with your feelings for her or whatever.
Author Scottyboyy Posted September 1, 2016 Author Posted September 1, 2016 There has been a thread started by a lady who is about her age, never had a BF, dated a little and was a virgin. She had a lot of anxiety about being in a relaiotnship and wondered how to handle it. She wanted to hold off on sex until the relationship got serious that it would be leading to marriage. I'm guessing she realized waiting for marriage would delete any chance of a man sticking around. She just didn't know how to or when to broach the subject with her new fella. They have been on about 8 dates, and he has asked her about sex as told him she wanted to take things slow. I know she fears he is just going to probably say no thanks and walk. I have a feeling this might be the case with your lady. Maybe she has never been with a man, and wants to wait but is afraid to say anything. You are just going to have that conversation to put her at ease, and to ask for exclusivity or where you are at with your feelings for her or whatever. Do you have a link to this thread? I just can't imagine this girl being a virgin. But you never know. I cannot even ask this question, I would feel so uncomfortable. A pretty girl in her mid to late 20's shouldnt really even be a question... We have had the exclusivity talk in person and via text. Here is the text exchange Me: How did you feel today after our great day and being able to meet my parents? Her: I feel good, glad it happened Me: Kiss emoji, I'm Happy Her: I like you Me: I'm really into you. You're the only woman in my life. I dont want to see anyone else. Her: Good because i feel the same and you're the only guy in mine Me: I literally feel like the luckiest guy in the world to have you Her: You always know what to say to make me blush
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