marky00 Posted September 1, 2016 Posted September 1, 2016 Yes, blocking by dumper if u haven't initiated contact would most likely be due to them wanting to have no reminder of what has happened. With the more awful breakups like this, dumpers have to eliminate from their minds or they would go insane with guilt. 1
Author AmyHershaw Posted September 1, 2016 Author Posted September 1, 2016 I'm glad you're not letting this deter you from having a romantic relationship with someone else. You will find someone. I forgot that they had blocked you already. Don't take it personally. I suspect that they know that what they've done is hurtful, even if they only know it on a very subtle leve, but don't want to be reminded of it in any way. You deserve to have better friends and healthier relationships. Be good to yourself. It would be silly of me to let one unsuccessful relationship and one guy who didn't treat me as well as he should have give me a negative outlook on all relationships. I'm sure I will find someone, I hope the search doesn't take too long! No worries, this thread is longer than I believed it would become, I've forgotten what I've put in earlier comments and I've been continuously looking back through this to remind myself of what has been said. I did at the time, but now, I'm glad they did as I don't have to look at anything they post about each other...which is regular. Her profile is filled with pictures and videos of him and her (I saw it whilst I had the fake account, I've made it impossible for me to access it now). I think that's the case, especially with him. He kept me on my other instagram account as I hadn't been on it for ages, and as soon as I posted something and he saw it, he blocked me on that. I did see him on the day he dumped me (which had been over text) as it was a friend of both of ours' birthday and he couldn't look in my direction at all. Thank you ever so much, your support is greatly appreciated and I will!
Author AmyHershaw Posted September 1, 2016 Author Posted September 1, 2016 Yes, blocking by dumper if u haven't initiated contact would most likely be due to them wanting to have no reminder of what has happened. With the more awful breakups like this, dumpers have to eliminate from their minds or they would go insane with guilt. I believe that's definitely the case, I know he's aware that what he did was wrong...he even told me when he was dumping me (over text) that he knows he's hurt me, but he never apologised or altered his ways, he just kept saying it was my fault because I had changed since having the implant put in...it only made me more emotional and it did give me depression, but it can have those effects on people. What you say is so true, many thanks!
juniorrocha Posted September 2, 2016 Posted September 2, 2016 marky00, stalking an ex is like taking off the plaster everytime. The best you can do is block them, walk the other way they're going and never look back. When you're over your ex, then they could be marrying the hottest and richest person in the world, they could get very rich, they could be very happy, and you're going to feel absolutely nothing. Your goal should be to get to that point. Then you can decide whether you'd like your ex back to your life as a friend or something or not.
marky00 Posted September 2, 2016 Posted September 2, 2016 (edited) marky00, stalking an ex is like taking off the plaster everytime. The best you can do is block them, walk the other way they're going and never look back. When you're over your ex, then they could be marrying the hottest and richest person in the world, they could get very rich, they could be very happy, and you're going to feel absolutely nothing. Your goal should be to get to that point. Then you can decide whether you'd like your ex back to your life as a friend or something or not. I am stalking me Ex??? No, it was more that she dumped me while in an LDR as I was going through an awful time which people can't see when they are in another country. I simply needed to see her fact-to-face to see if she really was done with me since we hadn't seen each other for like 7 months before the BU. We ended up going another 20 months but I will admit looking back, her heart wasn't in it like it was before. Just so super angry she gave up on me when I hit some rough times. Never offered to help or at least tell me how it was affecting her. Only reason why I wasn't calling her as much as that I was majorly stressed out. 30 days NC. Wouldn't call it a breakup this time since you can't break something that's already broken. But, I do feel this time, its NC forever which means I'll never get that chance to remedy what happened a few years back. I realise my behaviour has come off strange but I have always done it on the premise that the person she left back then was just super-stressed out and not himself. If you meant about my comment on stalking social media. Well, she broke it off when I visited her on a holiday. And I knew a third party was involved. I think I just needed to go to the source of the pain and see those photos for a few weeks. It hurt so bad but I actually think doing such things is more likely to get you truly over it than just buring it. Edited September 2, 2016 by marky00
Author AmyHershaw Posted September 4, 2016 Author Posted September 4, 2016 marky00, stalking an ex is like taking off the plaster everytime. The best you can do is block them, walk the other way they're going and never look back. When you're over your ex, then they could be marrying the hottest and richest person in the world, they could get very rich, they could be very happy, and you're going to feel absolutely nothing. Your goal should be to get to that point. Then you can decide whether you'd like your ex back to your life as a friend or something or not. What you say is true, a broken relationship cannot be fixed unless both people are willing to dedicate the effort and show the determination. It was rather foolish of me to attempt to fix the relationship after the break-up when he stopped talking to me the day it occurred. He did say we were over and he wanted nothing more to do with me, then he told me to "do one", which was upsetting and hurtful. However, there is nothing I could do to alter that. Sometimes, you have to accept things are the way they are, people do change and you will lose people you cared about (as tragic as it is). I would tell someone who had recently discovered their ex-partner's engagement to remember that their ex is their ex for a reason and to think, "Rather him/her than me." Waiting until the right person who you connect with on many levels and get along with on enters your life is better than marrying someone who causes you to feel stressed or get to such a low point that you cry regularly. There's making mistakes and there's repeating similar errors regularly. Marriage is all about whether or not you can spend the remainder of your life with that individual. Certainly, life could always take you another way and this where infidelity can come into place, but healthy relationships involve forgiveness and strong communication. No one is perfect, there will be times when each of the two people make errors in their relationship, but it's that which tests and determines if the person you have chosen to date is truly right from you. I see nothing wrong with befriending your ex-partner, but I understand that not everyone wants that and they believe their ex should have no part in their lives, which was the case for my ex-boyfriend. Again, there's nothing I can do to change that, I just have to come to terms with the fact that what has happened and has happened and there are lessons learned. I don't resent him for what he's done, he (unintentionally) taught me I need to stand up for myself for and two people in a relationship should always be understanding of each other's problems, even if they dislike what they hear or don't completely understand what the other is going through. I disagree with anyone saying they regret dating their ex-boyfriend/girlfriend or anything they did whilst you were with them, take any lessons you learned from them and be thankful that you did.
Author AmyHershaw Posted September 4, 2016 Author Posted September 4, 2016 I am stalking me Ex??? No, it was more that she dumped me while in an LDR as I was going through an awful time which people can't see when they are in another country. I simply needed to see her fact-to-face to see if she really was done with me since we hadn't seen each other for like 7 months before the BU. We ended up going another 20 months but I will admit looking back, her heart wasn't in it like it was before. Just so super angry she gave up on me when I hit some rough times. Never offered to help or at least tell me how it was affecting her. Only reason why I wasn't calling her as much as that I was majorly stressed out. 30 days NC. Wouldn't call it a breakup this time since you can't break something that's already broken. But, I do feel this time, its NC forever which means I'll never get that chance to remedy what happened a few years back. I realise my behaviour has come off strange but I have always done it on the premise that the person she left back then was just super-stressed out and not himself. If you meant about my comment on stalking social media. Well, she broke it off when I visited her on a holiday. And I knew a third party was involved. I think I just needed to go to the source of the pain and see those photos for a few weeks. It hurt so bad but I actually think doing such things is more likely to get you truly over it than just buring it. I'm so sorry that has happened to you, that must feel dreadful. At least now you are able to find someone who will treat you better, is more supportive of any issues you face and makes you feel happier, I'm sure you will find them soon!
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