Leigh 87 Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 What do you guys do for your anniversaries? It is our one year soon. What are you love languages and does your partner enjoy celebrating anniversaries in a way that you feel satisfied your love languages? He works full time and I study full time and am in between jobs. He got me a 150 dollar retro style dress, and is treating me to a hotel for a night which will include dinner. He just wants new shoes. However, I am saving and am of course going to surprise him with someone else. He loves food so much so I am going to get him a voucher to his favourite dumpling place. Or a short massage voucher. I am a student and between part time jobs right now so if I was working I would have splurged and gotten him a couples massage day at a nice day spa. I may actually get him a 50 dollar half hour massage rather than the food stuff! He treats himself way to often to food as it is, LOL. So: massage voucher for a very short lived massage, as well as the shoes which are prob 80 to 100 dollars. After all, his dinner will not be cheap (about 100 at least at the hotel one we like), and it is 400 ish a night including an awesome buffet breakfast which we are both huge fans of. I wish I could spend as much as he is going to on me, but I guess that is why I am in college; to become a podiatrists asap so that I can treat him as much as he treats me. Still feels bad though. I will be sure to give him loads of massages and back tickles to spoil him for lack of material things I can afford this anniversary. Acts of service are also his love language - he could not give a crap about receiving gifts or being spoilt. It does nothing for him. He likes that I enjoy cleaning for him. Although for a guy, he washes his own dishes most of the time which is lovely. Where as my thing is, well, to be a bit spoilt. But I would also put quality time down the list (I like my own time), and physical affection goes equal first. Acts of service are not essential - I like to clean and cook for the guy and assume that traditional role BUT I do not like slobs either. The fact he cleans up some of the time each week means the world to me -although I do prefer to do it more often than not.
TXGuy Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 My short answer is nothing. Since I'm not married, I don't have an anniversary. I don't understand how non-married couples determine one. Is it first date, first real date, first kiss, first time for sex, the day you agreed to exclusivity, or something else? I don't think any woman I've dated has tried to set an anniversary date to the relationship. At least not since high school or college. 1
HumanMachine Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 I took her to oxo tower last year, had a great evening.
jen1447 Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 He just wants new shoes. However, I am saving and am of course going to surprise him with someone else. Typo? I'll go out w my ppl here and there and gifts but the most meaningful thing to me is usually we reconnect spiritually w a very looooooooog and involved makeout session. That's my love language, haha. 2
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 30, 2016 Author Posted August 30, 2016 Typo? I'll go out w my ppl here and there and gifts but the most meaningful thing to me is usually we reconnect spiritually w a very looooooooog and involved makeout session. That's my love language, haha. ahh yes, I have experience with exes who were that way inclined. I got my ex, ex bf a threesome for a Christmas present... He wasn't the love of my life so ... for some people, there comes a time or a special person who changes their outlook regarding monogamy. My current bf is very traditional and vanilla - he has never had a threesome and has zero urges - although he has said, if he was SINGLE and two hot women wanted to pamper him and asked him to please have a threesome with them - that he would of course, happily oblige:lmao: But yeah, he never sought one out or fantasised about it. So thankfully, I do not feel he is that type of a person, as my exes were. Sorry to my dear. But I doubt he minds much. He just wants his back rubbed, his treats (food!), and time with me. He is so simple like that.
Shining One Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 Last year, she had to work late. I cooked her favorite dish and got her a present. This year, I took her on a trip.
Gaeta Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 Our 1 year dating will be coming up in 2 months. It never crossed my mind to celebrate it. I am not sure I even remember the exact date we met lol.
Miss Peach Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 My BF and I exchanged cards. I really don't care that much for big gifts since I tend to buy anything I need and I don't like to have excess around me. I prefer small gestures more. If it weren't for BF and his insane ability to remember dates, I wouldn't have had any idea when it was.
introverted1 Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 I don't celebrate dating "anniversaries" but, if I did, it would be a huge turn-off to know that my partner was calculating the dollar value of my gift. When I was married, we would exchange cards and go out to dinner. Occasionally, we'd swap gifts but they were more likely to be sentimental than expensive. 1
smackie9 Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 Not much. Flowers and dinner usually. For our 25 he took me to Barrett Jackson car action in Arizona. It was great until I got the flu and missed Alice Cooper auctioning off his Corvette :/ Sharon Stone was there too.
No_Go Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 Gosh that's the same man that you recently broke up because 'he was an addict, indulging into 1 week long drug binge and losing his stable job'??? If you got back together, anniversary is at the very bottom of your problem list.... To answer to your question though - we went for dinner and drinks for our 1st year. And we did it not on the date, but somewhere in our anniversary month. I think that's pretty much what i'd expect for dating couples. For marriage anniversary - maybe a present and / or dinner with the families. What do you guys do for your anniversaries? It is our one year soon. What are you love languages and does your partner enjoy celebrating anniversaries in a way that you feel satisfied your love languages? He works full time and I study full time and am in between jobs. He got me a 150 dollar retro style dress, and is treating me to a hotel for a night which will include dinner. He just wants new shoes. However, I am saving and am of course going to surprise him with someone else. He loves food so much so I am going to get him a voucher to his favourite dumpling place. Or a short massage voucher. I am a student and between part time jobs right now so if I was working I would have splurged and gotten him a couples massage day at a nice day spa. I may actually get him a 50 dollar half hour massage rather than the food stuff! He treats himself way to often to food as it is, LOL. So: massage voucher for a very short lived massage, as well as the shoes which are prob 80 to 100 dollars. After all, his dinner will not be cheap (about 100 at least at the hotel one we like), and it is 400 ish a night including an awesome buffet breakfast which we are both huge fans of. I wish I could spend as much as he is going to on me, but I guess that is why I am in college; to become a podiatrists asap so that I can treat him as much as he treats me. Still feels bad though. I will be sure to give him loads of massages and back tickles to spoil him for lack of material things I can afford this anniversary. Acts of service are also his love language - he could not give a crap about receiving gifts or being spoilt. It does nothing for him. He likes that I enjoy cleaning for him. Although for a guy, he washes his own dishes most of the time which is lovely. Where as my thing is, well, to be a bit spoilt. But I would also put quality time down the list (I like my own time), and physical affection goes equal first. Acts of service are not essential - I like to clean and cook for the guy and assume that traditional role BUT I do not like slobs either. The fact he cleans up some of the time each week means the world to me -although I do prefer to do it more often than not. 4
andie1969 Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 Not much. Flowers and dinner usually. For our 25 he took me to Barrett Jackson car action in Arizona. It was great until I got the flu and missed Alice Cooper auctioning off his Corvette :/ Sharon Stone was there too. My cousin is an auctioneer for that event, fun seeing him on TV! Back in Feb. my bf and I were in the same wine bar that we first met, and I said, hey, we met here almost a year ago (met end of feb, not sure of date) and we clinked glasses and said cheers. That was all the formal celebrating that was done.
joseb Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 Gosh that's the same man that you recently broke up because 'he was an addict, indulging into 1 week long drug binge and losing his stable job'??? If you got back together, anniversary is at the very bottom of your problem list.... Yeah i thought it must be an old post or something.. Not getting this.... 1
GemmaUK Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 I thought you broke up because of his drug habit which you found out about?? You only posted it this last week?? Anniversaries were just cool and coupley - cooking together was a good night whilst singing, dancing...on our own..in our kitchen.. Always a blast they were!
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 30, 2016 Author Posted August 30, 2016 Gosh that's the same man that you recently broke up because 'he was an addict, indulging into 1 week long drug binge and losing his stable job'??? If you got back together, anniversary is at the very bottom of your problem list.... To answer to your question though - we went for dinner and drinks for our 1st year. And we did it not on the date, but somewhere in our anniversary month. I think that's pretty much what i'd expect for dating couples. For marriage anniversary - maybe a present and / or dinner with the families. He is doing fine thanks. He is getting the help he needs. He didn't end up loosing the job and is in long term therapy and is considered "low risk" right now. When you find someone really special- 10/10 chemistry AND 10/10 compatability- you don't just leave them when they go through a hard time. I left initially as I have a 0 tolerance stance on drugs. So he has dealt with it and is doing everything it takes to never go there again. As for fhe dollar value--- we are both super into spoiling each other with affection and love. But when I work I love to splash out on partners, especially him. So yeah, given spoiling is a predominant love language of mine, alongside physical touch, I kind of do need a very generous guy. In my past relationships, when I worked and got them amazing gifts I often felt un balanced when they got me a mere card, never took me on weekends away and got me to go bug my own drinks and dinner in front if all my friends ( when their bfs all paid). I was the one who paid for weekends away prior to this. Needless to say, I feel totally spoilt and greatful at this latest anniversary gift coming up! I only wish I worked atm so I could splurge on him!
No_Go Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 Who considers him 'low risk'? Unless you hear it from a d-r, I urge you not to trust blindly - addictions are not treated overnight (especially hard drugs like meth...). Proceed very very very carefully. If he needs a detox and rehab - that's a much bigger priority than splashing on hotel rooms and dinners. I know you're genuine with your feelings towards him but please think about it from a position of a future medical professional, not an enamoured woman. He is doing fine thanks. He is getting the help he needs. He didn't end up loosing the job and is in long term therapy and is considered "low risk" right now. When you find someone really special- 10/10 chemistry AND 10/10 compatability- you don't just leave them when they go through a hard time. I left initially as I have a 0 tolerance stance on drugs. So he has dealt with it and is doing everything it takes to never go there again. As for fhe dollar value--- we are both super into spoiling each other with affection and love. But when I work I love to splash out on partners, especially him. So yeah, given spoiling is a predominant love language of mine, alongside physical touch, I kind of do need a very generous guy. In my past relationships, when I worked and got them amazing gifts I often felt un balanced when they got me a mere card, never took me on weekends away and got me to go bug my own drinks and dinner in front if all my friends ( when their bfs all paid). I was the one who paid for weekends away prior to this. Needless to say, I feel totally spoilt and greatful at this latest anniversary gift coming up! I only wish I worked atm so I could splurge on him! 2
basil67 Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 My short answer is nothing. Since I'm not married, I don't have an anniversary. I don't understand how non-married couples determine one. Is it first date, first real date, first kiss, first time for sex, the day you agreed to exclusivity, or something else? I don't think any woman I've dated has tried to set an anniversary date to the relationship. At least not since high school or college. From the long term defacto person, we pretty much did all those things on the weekend we met. We don't actually celebrate it, but we do remember it. It's easy to remember because it's a holiday weekend. I can't tell you the actual date That said, now that our kids are older, we use the date as an excuse to try and get away for a night or two around that time of year.
clia Posted August 31, 2016 Posted August 31, 2016 We've never bought gifts for each other for dating anniversaries. We just acknowledge the date, usually with a nice dinner together. We acknowledge the day we met and the day we had our first date, which for a variety of reasons was about a month after we first met. I don't see the need to spend a lot for dating anniversaries. To be honest, it seems strange to buy gifts for each other for this type of anniversary. I think it's nice to acknowledge it, though.
Els Posted August 31, 2016 Posted August 31, 2016 I am very concerned that you are back with your bf so soon after his drug binge. Anyway, to answer your question, we don't have an 'anniversary' per se (it's not easy to decide which date to use!), but we do use Valentines' Day as a 'placeholder' of sorts. And the stuff we do is pretty standard, he takes me out to a nice dinner (not usually on the day itself, but on the weekend before or after) and sometimes gets me flowers. I usually pick up a few items from the adult store and we, uh, use them after the dinner. Sounds cheesy maybe, but a little cheese once a year never hurts... 4
MissBee Posted August 31, 2016 Posted August 31, 2016 What do you guys do for your anniversaries? It is our one year soon. What are you love languages and does your partner enjoy celebrating anniversaries in a way that you feel satisfied your love languages? He works full time and I study full time and am in between jobs. He got me a 150 dollar retro style dress, and is treating me to a hotel for a night which will include dinner. He just wants new shoes. However, I am saving and am of course going to surprise him with someone else. He loves food so much so I am going to get him a voucher to his favourite dumpling place. Or a short massage voucher. I am a student and between part time jobs right now so if I was working I would have splurged and gotten him a couples massage day at a nice day spa. I may actually get him a 50 dollar half hour massage rather than the food stuff! He treats himself way to often to food as it is, LOL. So: massage voucher for a very short lived massage, as well as the shoes which are prob 80 to 100 dollars. After all, his dinner will not be cheap (about 100 at least at the hotel one we like), and it is 400 ish a night including an awesome buffet breakfast which we are both huge fans of. I wish I could spend as much as he is going to on me, but I guess that is why I am in college; to become a podiatrists asap so that I can treat him as much as he treats me. Still feels bad though. I will be sure to give him loads of massages and back tickles to spoil him for lack of material things I can afford this anniversary. Acts of service are also his love language - he could not give a crap about receiving gifts or being spoilt. It does nothing for him. He likes that I enjoy cleaning for him. Although for a guy, he washes his own dishes most of the time which is lovely. Where as my thing is, well, to be a bit spoilt. But I would also put quality time down the list (I like my own time), and physical affection goes equal first. Acts of service are not essential - I like to clean and cook for the guy and assume that traditional role BUT I do not like slobs either. The fact he cleans up some of the time each week means the world to me -although I do prefer to do it more often than not. If he doesn't give a crap about gifts and prefers acts of service, why are you so concerned about not being able to afford material things? If that's not his love language any way, no need to bend yourself out of shape catering to a love language you yourself say isn't one he values. 3
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 31, 2016 Author Posted August 31, 2016 I am very concerned that you are back with your bf so soon after his drug binge. Anyway, to answer your question, we don't have an 'anniversary' per se (it's not easy to decide which date to use!), but we do use Valentines' Day as a 'placeholder' of sorts. And the stuff we do is pretty standard, he takes me out to a nice dinner (not usually on the day itself, but on the weekend before or after) and sometimes gets me flowers. I usually pick up a few items from the adult store and we, uh, use them after the dinner. Sounds cheesy maybe, but a little cheese once a year never hurts... He experimented when younger. Found he had an addictive personality so stopped. A trucker at work offered him free speed..he thought why not. It lead to a binge. He hated how drugs made him feel. He quit his job to get away from that environment and got another better job away from the bad influences. Psych said he doesn't need rehab but needs ongoing therapy. He has agreed to go to re hab and do whatever it takes if he is driven to use again. Please lets keep on topic. We are stupidly happy and he is recovering well. I have a good feeling things could last.
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 31, 2016 Author Posted August 31, 2016 If he doesn't give a crap about gifts and prefers acts of service, why are you so concerned about not being able to afford material things? If that's not his love language any way, no need to bend yourself out of shape catering to a love language you yourself say isn't one he values. Cos I have generous parents and I love to spoil a guy when I am into them. Especially when I am in love and love them deeply on top of the chemistry driven euphoria. I love to be a bit pampered so it feels very un balanced to not reciprocate.
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 31, 2016 Author Posted August 31, 2016 I am very concerned that you are back with your bf so soon after his drug binge. Anyway, to answer your question, we don't have an 'anniversary' per se (it's not easy to decide which date to use!), but we do use Valentines' Day as a 'placeholder' of sorts. And the stuff we do is pretty standard, he takes me out to a nice dinner (not usually on the day itself, but on the weekend before or after) and sometimes gets me flowers. I usually pick up a few items from the adult store and we, uh, use them after the dinner. Sounds cheesy maybe, but a little cheese once a year never hurts... Oh my. Elswyth:o ....Brilliant idea! I think I would like to inject some fun surprises into his " shoe" present. Massage is too predictable.
JoeSmith357-1 Posted August 31, 2016 Posted August 31, 2016 Maybe hold off on anything until he is clean and drug free for a year, then celebrate that... He's all better after 1 week?
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