Author Zeo828 Posted August 30, 2016 Author Posted August 30, 2016 (edited) You know? I knew saying that I messaged 43 women in a week was going to open a can of worms. I'm just new to the site and trying. I read every profile and sent a person a message. Nothing was canned. It's a dating website, people don't even say much about themselves on it, I'm trying. It was something I tried for the first week. Now I'm more reserved, as I mentioned in a post. Of course not everyone I wrote to is my match. Everyone I wrote to was interesting enough one way or another, with what little they said in their profile. I'm just trying to be open and messaging many people the first week. I had the time, so I did it. Nothing was canned. Once again, the point of this thread is about people who respond once with a question and do not respond back. I'm not upset that no one else responded to me. It's just something I'm trying. Something different. It's obviously not successful, but who cares?? I'm fine with it. Isn't the goal of a dating website to see what's out there? To try? Maybe the first week I tried allot. But I tried, that's it. 2nd week I slowed it down, as I mentioned. But not one message I sent was canned. Edited August 30, 2016 by Zeo828
morrowrd Posted August 30, 2016 Posted August 30, 2016 welcome to microwave dating. I had a girl become so into my profile that she messaged me begging me to respond...which I did, she was hot. We went back and forth all day and set up a date for that evening, she couldn't wait. I met her, she was so bubbly and seemingly into the date, stating she wanted to see me again an hour into our date. We had a snowstorm approaching and I suggested she might want to get home, and we could reconnect later. I liked her. Besides being pretty, she was really down to earth and appeared to be fun to be with. About 8 hours after the date, I messaged her and asked her if she was ok and arrived home safe.....nothing. The next day, I messaged her and talked about the date, positively....nothing in return. I then immediately texted, "do you want me to leave you alone?" and a second later a response, "please do." I did, and was both confused but understanding about this weird world of online dating. 2
Author Zeo828 Posted August 31, 2016 Author Posted August 31, 2016 Well thanks for sharing that story. It sounds like it sucks. But in a month I'll be out of online dating and the nonsense that goes along with it. And once again to that fellow who said that in his day you pursued 1 woman with gusto I want to say that this is online dating, not the real world. In a perfect world I sure would like to meet that one woman and give her my all. But guess what? It's not a perfect world. So I decided to try online dating and give it a shot, giving as much effort as I can the first week on the site. That's all. 1
Miss Peach Posted August 31, 2016 Posted August 31, 2016 (edited) I agree with the last post. Well, my thread just had to do with the question of why do people respond, only to not respond to my follow up? I ask questions that have to do with her profile, to get the conversation going. Did they lose whatever little interest they had in a span of 1 message? Lol And by the way, thier first and only responses had a question for me as well. So I responded back with an answer to thier question and I had my own question. Then nothing. Maybe she didn't like my choice for favorite Beatles album? Lol Sometimes a guy will say something that let me know it's not a match. I like to just say something like 'Thank you for messaging me but it's not a match'. I know a lot of women (and men) just ignore instead of being direct. The thing is with dating it may not be anything personal or that you did or said. I know sometimes I just get bogged down at work or something and just don't have the time to respond to everyone who messages me. So if I have to prioritize, it may be with people putting in more effort or that I'm farther along with in the process. Hmm...interesting post and perspective. Speaking as a woman who is used to getting a lot of messages from men of all varieties, I can definitely tell the ones who cast their net wide and send out canned emails hoping to snag just one unsuspecting prospect. Totally agree. I don't even bother responding to the ones that look canned anymore. I would even come across mirror matches of myself when it comes to what I seek in a match. I came across a couple of rare, geek, but cute sci-fi ladies around my age. Some were wearing cosplay outfits at the conventions and mentioned I did the same. In their interests, they'd have board games they are interested in like Settlers of Catan, Dominion....a lot of strategy games I zeroed in on. I thought they were a god send! Same belief systems, too. Only to contact them with a well thought out email, pointing out certain interests in their profile, mentioned certain board games and other fun hobbies only to be ignored. It was rather surprising considering finding a woman into hobbies most men are into. A unicorn rather. lol. Maybe you are looking in the wrong circles? I'm a bit of a geek/nerd but I do this stuff regularly (things like a good game of Catan or Munchkin). I've been able to find a lot of like-minded people in my age range who do. Maybe try the meetups that attract geeks/nerds? Or board game meetups? That's where I've been able to meet a lot of people like this. I also sometimes go to coding meetups but I tend to find those have a bunch of guys trying to sound important. My advice is real world or OLD, just move things into the two of you and get to know each other. Don't take things as something against you. Remember you are looking for the best match for you; not necessarily trying to get everyone to like you. Edited August 31, 2016 by Miss Peach
Toodaloo Posted August 31, 2016 Posted August 31, 2016 Zeo Those girls are not all that into you. Unless the message is bouyant and upbeat when they respond (in which case they have probably just been busy and want to give you their full attention) then nah. Write it off and give up. Your time is better spent else where.
LookAtThisPOst Posted August 31, 2016 Posted August 31, 2016 Sometimes a guy will say something that let me know it's not a match. I like to just say something like 'Thank you for messaging me but it's not a match'. I know a lot of women (and men) just ignore instead of being direct. The thing is with dating it may not be anything personal or that you did or said. I know sometimes I just get bogged down at work or something and just don't have the time to respond to everyone who messages me. So if I have to prioritize, it may be with people putting in more effort or that I'm farther along with in the process. Totally agree. I don't even bother responding to the ones that look canned anymore. Maybe you are looking in the wrong circles? I'm a bit of a geek/nerd but I do this stuff regularly (things like a good game of Catan or Munchkin). I've been able to find a lot of like-minded people in my age range who do. Maybe try the meetups that attract geeks/nerds? Or board game meetups? That's where I've been able to meet a lot of people like this. I also sometimes go to coding meetups but I tend to find those have a bunch of guys trying to sound important. My advice is real world or OLD, just move things into the two of you and get to know each other. Don't take things as something against you. Remember you are looking for the best match for you; not necessarily trying to get everyone to like you. I di go to those Meetups and still do. Everyone there is married or coupled up. Lol. There was a time a +1 came with a friend, but she wasn't a member. She was getting out of the house. I got her number, but all she wanted to do was gab on the phone, but not meet.
Author Zeo828 Posted August 31, 2016 Author Posted August 31, 2016 Of course those women were not into me. I just don't understand why bother writing me in the first place. But it is what it is. The way I look at it, whether it's 1 or 1000 responses, once the responses end from the person, I know what it means. Proof is in the putting. Really nothing left to be said. Thanks all.
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