Online Dating Messaging

[Zeo828]

Hi

 

OK I get the deal. You write to someone, they do not respond. They are not interested. No big deal, totally fine.

 

Messaging in online dating is a tennis ball. You serve, and if the other person serves back you have a game. When someone stops hitting the ball back, it's over. For whatever reason. I get it.

 

But what's with the people who read your message, take 2 days to respond, only for you to respond and not hear form back from them right away after 1 message. I mean was it something I said? I make sure to be polite, light, and respectful.

 

To put the cherry on top, I had a friend tell me that there is in art to responding. You have to do this and that, but not too much. Say this but not that. I mean give me a break? Why is it so complicated?!

 

I actually have a date with a girl. She messaged me, I returned the serve and we played Tennis all day LOl and now we have a date lined up.

 

I just don't get these 1 response people and they fade away. If you are not that interested, do not respond at all. It's cool.

 

Just my opinion and observations.

[Philosopher]

Hi

 

OK I get the deal. You write to someone, they do not respond. They are not interested. No big deal, totally fine.

 

Messaging in online dating is a tennis ball. You serve, and if the other person serves back you have a game. When someone stops hitting the ball back, it's over. For whatever reason. I get it.

 

But what's with the people who read your message, take 2 days to respond, only for you to respond and not hear form back from them right away after 1 message. I mean was it something I said? I make sure to be polite, light, and respectful.

 

To put the cherry on top, I had a friend tell me that there is in art to responding. You have to do this and that, but not too much. Say this but not that. I mean give me a break? Why is it so complicated?!

 

I actually have a date with a girl. She messaged me, I returned the serve and we played Tennis all day LOl and now we have a date lined up.

 

I just don't get these 1 response people and they fade away. If you are not that interested, do not respond at all. It's cool.

 

Just my opinion and observations.

 

I have wondered this myself. In most cases when this happens their reply will be very short and will usually not include any questions, something along the lines of this: "I am good thanks". I suspect they were never interested to begin with and they only reply as they consider it is the polite thing to do. Sort of a less harsh way of saying thanks, but no thanks, in which they hope you get the message. Though personally like you I would rather they did not reply in the first place.

 

If I get these sorts of messages I generally now don't bother to message them further as it is almost always a waste of time to message them further. For example a few days ago I got a reply which consisted of just "Oh, Hi". I did not reply.

[NJ123]

Hi

 

OK I get the deal. You write to someone, they do not respond. They are not interested. No big deal, totally fine.

 

Messaging in online dating is a tennis ball. You serve, and if the other person serves back you have a game. When someone stops hitting the ball back, it's over. For whatever reason. I get it.

 

But what's with the people who read your message, take 2 days to respond, only for you to respond and not hear form back from them right away after 1 message. I mean was it something I said? I make sure to be polite, light, and respectful.

 

To put the cherry on top, I had a friend tell me that there is in art to responding. You have to do this and that, but not too much. Say this but not that. I mean give me a break? Why is it so complicated?!

 

I actually have a date with a girl. She messaged me, I returned the serve and we played Tennis all day LOl and now we have a date lined up.

 

I just don't get these 1 response people and they fade away. If you are not that interested, do not respond at all. It's cool.

 

Just my opinion and observations.

 

This just happened to me a few days ago. I sent a message it took them over 24 hours to reply back, than I sent another message & never heard back from them. Also, happened a few months ago with someone else where it took them literally 4 days to reply back than I responded & never heard back from them again. This all happened on Tinder too where they match with you, so why do they even bother to match or reply once in the first place if they never have any intentions of talking afterwards. It's really annoying. I have a new rule where if someone doesn't respond in a 24 hour time frame at most than I just unmatch them. There's absolutely no reason for why someone can't take literally 30 seconds out of their day to respond to a message throughout a full day.

[smackie9]

Why not have a set expectation.....if they don't respond within say 4 hours, just write them off, even if they respond two days later or whatever. Message as many as you can....someone will get back to you right away.

[Popsicle]

My thought is that they were not interested or not interested enough but felt guilty just ignoring you the first time and never responding. Basically they were just being polite.

[NJ123]

My thought is that they were not interested or not interested enough but felt guilty just ignoring you the first time and never responding. Basically they were just being polite.

 

But what gets me is why match with someone in the first place if you're just going to ignore their message or only reply once than never again. I take it as more insulting that they reply once than never again than for them to never reply at all to be honest even though both are pretty messed up to do. I used to do it when I swiped right on everyone but I always felt bad when I had no attraction them so I swipe right on ones that I only find attraction towards now.

Edited August 29, 2016 by NJ123

[Miss Peach]

I know for me I get busy with work and life and get a lot of messages when I'm on OLD. Sometimes I don't see they messages or I read it and have to take care of something at work and don't get to write back right away (or forget), etc. I do try to get to people within a day or two and I do try to include a question or keep things going. I don't get invested or take things personally until we meet IRL. Even then someone may be fun to hang out with but not my idea of a match (or I might not be theirs). I wait to see who I like to spend time with, who seems compatible, and who sticks.

 

The thing that gets me is when guys just send the bare minimum and it's like pulling teeth to talk to the. They are usually the guys who message something like 'Hi', 'Wht's up?', 'How are you?', etc. I don't even bother responding to those anymore. I assume they were just playing number to begin with and I haven never received a non-lazy response when I take the bait.

[SwordofFlame]

Hi

 

OK I get the deal. You write to someone, they do not respond. They are not interested. No big deal, totally fine.

 

Messaging in online dating is a tennis ball. You serve, and if the other person serves back you have a game. When someone stops hitting the ball back, it's over. For whatever reason. I get it.

 

But what's with the people who read your message, take 2 days to respond, only for you to respond and not hear form back from them right away after 1 message. I mean was it something I said? I make sure to be polite, light, and respectful.

 

To put the cherry on top, I had a friend tell me that there is in art to responding. You have to do this and that, but not too much. Say this but not that. I mean give me a break? Why is it so complicated?!

 

I actually have a date with a girl. She messaged me, I returned the serve and we played Tennis all day LOl and now we have a date lined up.

 

I just don't get these 1 response people and they fade away. If you are not that interested, do not respond at all. It's cool.

 

Just my opinion and observations.

 

I do this even after I've initiated a conversation. It's usually do it to not having time to meet up for a date or very low interest. I don't like having long extended conversations online. If I can't meet you rather soon, I'm not going to bother continuing to communicate online.

 

As for the low interest part, I usually just quickly skim through the profile (or just swipe right on everyone) and then realized that we're not probably not a match.

[Zeo828]

Well, since I started this thread I will give one quick example of what happened.

 

I saw a woman's profile who interested me. She is 38 like me, same city. I wrote her a message. In her profile she mentioned her favorite Beatles album. I introduced myself and asked her what her favorite song was on the album. Even though she read it right away, she responded 2 days later (which is fine). She answered my question, then proceeded to ask me what my plans were for the weekend. I responded with an answer, as well as mentioning my favorite Beatles album, and asking her what were her plans....just to get the conversation going. The email was read, no response. It's been 4 days.

 

I realized today, I am a proof is in the pudding guy. Whether it's one message, or 10. Once it dies it dies. It's over. Yes the whole 1 message thing is annoying, but whatever. You can only serve the ball and see if it gets hit back to you, and if not, screw it.

 

However, what is annoying is what my friend was telling me. "Say stuff, but not too much. Act interested but not too interested" I'm at a point where I could care less about this crap. Honestly, you can give them "dogSh%t" and they will still respond if they like you.

 

As mentioned, I have a date lined up this week, and there were no games. We kept hitting the ball to each other all day, and not once did I have any doubts to what I was saying.

 

 

So the proof is in the pudding, whether it's one message or 10.

 

 

PS This happened on Match.com I have not online dated in a while but man some women ( and I am sure men) give you nothing to work with. It's just the same "I love dogs, traveling, family, and having fun." LOL. Not all women, but many more than I thought there would be.

Edited August 29, 2016 by Zeo828

[anonymousbear00101100]

I live in a college town and Tinder is my favorite app.

 

As far as I see it, the first message is the most important. "Hi" or "whats up" makes up for 90% of the first messages I've gotten. It's hard to start a conversation that begins with "Oh yeah I'm just watching Netflix in bed".

 

Thrilling.

We all are.

 

I've found some girls incredibly attractive and had no chemistry with them because they were just boring to talk to. Be funny or witty or charming in your messages, and you will find yourself down an interesting road that often leads to a meetup. They swiped right on you for a reason.

 

Now the thing about replying to a message days later (which I find annoying as hell) is twofold:

 

1. They felt no connection originally but want a second change

2. They're bored/lonely and want to feel better about themselves

 

My rule of thumb is if they don't respond for 24 hours, I don't respond.

[NJ123]

I live in a college town and Tinder is my favorite app.

 

As far as I see it, the first message is the most important. "Hi" or "whats up" makes up for 90% of the first messages I've gotten. It's hard to start a conversation that begins with "Oh yeah I'm just watching Netflix in bed".

 

Thrilling.

We all are.

 

I've found some girls incredibly attractive and had no chemistry with them because they were just boring to talk to. Be funny or witty or charming in your messages, and you will find yourself down an interesting road that often leads to a meetup. They swiped right on you for a reason.

 

Now the thing about replying to a message days later (which I find annoying as hell) is twofold:

 

1. They felt no connection originally but want a second change

2. They're bored/lonely and want to feel better about themselves

 

My rule of thumb is if they don't respond for 24 hours, I don't respond.

 

Yeah, that's what I do now is if someone doesn't respond within a 24 hour period than I unmatch them. It's just pointless since I notice whenever someone takes that long to respond usually they always take long to reply back or never reply back anyway. I take it as them having no interest since it's not that hard to take 30 seconds out of your day to respond to a message.

[dumbass2]

I've had a woman on Match give me her number (she contacted me first and at my request I asked for her number after going back and forth 3 times) then I proceed to call and leave a message and nothing back. This has happened twice and one time I got a call shortly after I left a message from an unknown caller and I answered because I thought it might be her, only to have the person sit there on the phone for a few seconds and then hang up. Guess she didn't like the sound of my voice.

 

A lot of people on there might be dealing with multiple people at one time and when they decide on one, then just ghost the others. I also know that people work and have things going on. Getting back in a few days is okay and sometimes I'll send one last one if they were the one to contact me. I think some people are also on there for just attention (maybe married or going through a rough spot with the boyfriend). I don't take anything personally, but I think a lot of people on there are probably not at a good point in their life to actively be trying to date and get into a relationship. Might have just gotten out of one and trying to get over it or just too many things going on in their life at the moment. It definitely can be frustrating at times. Dating sucks at an older age. Time isn't on our side. lol

[Zeo828]

Yeah.... Very true.

 

But one last thing I just realized about match. They allow people to make a profile with pictures and the works, and you can see them. Even contact them. But if they did not subscribe to it, then they don't receive your message.

 

So there are profiles of people on there who don't even have an account! I guess they allow this to entice them to subscribe, so if they get a message it will tell them " so and so has left you a message, subscribe and see what they said." But me being on the other side does not know that. Which explains why some messages are never read.

 

Some even state in their profiles that they don't subscribe to match, if interested they leave a coded email for where you can reach them.

 

 

Match should not allow a profile to go live unless the person subscribes. That is BS. That's why after my month is over I will nor resubscribe.

[Larryville]

I don't take anything personally

 

VERY IMPORTANT!

 

Match should not allow a profile to go live unless the person subscribes. That is BS. That's why after my month is over I will nor resubscribe.

 

Why dating sites are NOT about dating success but dating failure. Why else would they populate their sites with DEAD or inactive accounts?

 

it is in their interest to make you believe you have access to all of these people when you really don't. Depending on your population density when you go down your list of desired traits only a handful of people ON ANY SITE is even a marginal match to you, unless you just don't give a damn who you hook up with and settle.

 

A lot of people on there might be dealing with multiple people at one time and when they decide on one, then just ghost the others.

 

Just like acquiring any bit of knowledge it is seriously easy to tell the difference between a profile with someone actually engaged in the process of meeting someone and is actually willing to meet someone vs someone on a dating site for pure entertainment values and to alleviate boredom in their down time.

 

Learn how to process OLD profiles and you will save yourself time and anguish.

 

Another note on Match, avoid profiles void of the green outline around it. Also look at their activity, someone who is a paying member won’t be inactive for any extended period of time.

[Sunkissedpatio]

Mild interest = respond day(s) later

Interest = when message is read or within a few hours of

 

Like others said, don't take things personally everyone online tends to have "kitten seeing shiny object syndrome"rubbernecking at the first sight of something shinier. Then when it doesn't pan out, let me see who I can respond to that has expressed interest.

[Miss Peach]

I guess for me I really have no idea who will pan out from a few messages online so I really don't have much interest in a guy until it transitions offline. Men do all the same things you are complaining about. It's really just how many people are.

 

However, what is annoying is what my friend was telling me. "Say stuff, but not too much. Act interested but not too interested" I'm at a point where I could care less about this crap. Honestly, you can give them "dogSh%t" and they will still respond if they like you.

 

My BF says crap like this. It's actually one of the reasons I wasn't sure if I wanted him and why I'm hesitant taking things farther. IME that approach is great at getting women with low self esteem who are attracted to push/pull. It's not going to give you a woman with self esteem and options.

 

As far as I see it, the first message is the most important. "Hi" or "whats up" makes up for 90% of the first messages I've gotten. It's hard to start a conversation that begins with "Oh yeah I'm just watching Netflix in bed".

 

Thrilling.

We all are.

 

I've found some girls incredibly attractive and had no chemistry with them because they were just boring to talk to. Be funny or witty or charming in your messages, and you will find yourself down an interesting road that often leads to a meetup. They swiped right on you for a reason.

 

Again a lot of men are like this too. I have tried to be nice in the past but it's just too annoying to work with this and I just ignore those messages now. It doesn't need to be a novel but it needs to be quality communication and/or witty.

[NJ123]

Mild interest = respond day(s) later

Interest = when message is read or within a few hours of

 

Like others said, don't take things personally everyone online tends to have "kitten seeing shiny object syndrome"rubbernecking at the first sight of something shinier. Then when it doesn't pan out, let me see who I can respond to that has expressed interest.

 

That's probably what some do when they respond days later. But what I don't get are the ones that literally only reply once, maybe twice at most than never again. It's like what's the point? If it's meant to be seen as being polite to just respond it's not in my opinion. If you have no interest than don't reply at all is how I see it.

[Michelle ma Belle]

Why not have a set expectation.....if they don't respond within say 4 hours, just write them off, even if they respond two days later or whatever. Message as many as you can....someone will get back to you right away.

 

Abso-freaking-lutely!

 

I've become quite brutal navigating the hallowed halls of online dating. You have to be these day. At some point you figure out how to play the game through trial and error (and yes, it does feel like a game).

 

 

I've encountered many men who have sent me winks/flirts/pokes (whatever) indicating their interest. Most times that's the extent of our communication. I still can't wrap my head around why people bother doing that if they have no intentions of reaching out and talking to me. If they do follow up with an email it's often just "Hey!". Seriously? Can't string together a sentence that includes more than just a greeting?

 

Strike one.

 

If/when I reciprocate interest regardless if they message me first or not, I'll send a short note thanking them for their interest and will always say something that opens the door for a conversation.

 

There is nothing more frustrating than when you see that your message has been read yet they haven't bothered to respond for days never mind in a timely manner despite being online continuously. I mean, YOU poked me first dude.

 

Strike two.

 

Then you have those men who've indicated their interest and never bother connecting. I take a few weeks/months off from OLD only to return to find their interest in me indicated once again. Sometimes, if I'm 'lucky' they'll followup this time with a short message but so often not and it feels like Groundhog day.

 

Strike three.

 

So...tired with the empty solicitations (it's an epidemic if you ask me) I developed a couple of 'rules' for myself out of self preservation; I give interested prospects 48 hours to send through a thoughtful response in the hopes a game of tennis is on the horizon. If not, regardless of how amazing their profile may be or if a choir of angels break out in unified chorus every time I gaze upon his pictures, I will NOT reciprocate in like no matter if/when they decide to communicate.

 

It's called manners!

 

 

 

 

I am one of those people online who is inundated with interest and messages and I always, ALWAYS, aim to be as thoughtful and respectful as possible to everyone who makes an effort and takes the time. And if I take too long to respond for whatever reason, I always apologize for my tardy reply. What's so difficult?

 

It's sad how being online seems to bring out the worst in people sometimes. It's like their manners take a vacation and for me, that is a clear indication of someone's true character. I don't have time to waste on people who can't extend a bit common sense.

 

Unfortunately, too many are easily distracted and/or are just horrible communicators so actually enjoying a rousing game of tennis has become something of a rarity anymore. If a guy's attention is that fleeting than so is mine. My time is valuable. I know my worth and I know what I bring to the table even if men online or in real life don't and I never deviate or compromise on that.

 

THAT is my superpower!

 

The moral of this story is be discerning, demand more from others unless you enjoy being an after thought, always be courteous and respectful unless someone gives you reason not to be and always be true to yourself.

 

Online dating shouldn't change who we are and if it does than what does that say about society? about dating and relationships? Pretty dim if you ask me.

Edited August 30, 2016 by Michelle ma Belle

[Zeo828]

I agree with the last post.

 

Well, my thread just had to do with the question of why do people respond, only to not respond to my follow up? I ask questions that have to do with her profile, to get the conversation going. Did they lose whatever little interest they had in a span of 1 message? Lol And by the way, thier first and only responses had a question for me as well. So I responded back with an answer to thier question and I had my own question. Then nothing. Maybe she didn't like my choice for favorite Beatles album? Lol

 

 

Yes of course, move on. I'm just questioning why respond to me in the first place . But it is what it is.

 

And yes, the winking thing had me so perpelxed. Why wink when we can write to each other? A co worker told me it's because sometimes a woman would rather wink to let me know that I can message her. Which is fine, but as a man I will always message.

 

I sent 43 messages in a week, all after reading thier profiles.

I only got 2 responses that, as mentioned, went no where.

The rest were either "read" and ignored (which is fine). I get the hint.

And many were never marked as "read" which makes me feel that some of these profiles are no longer live.

 

This was my first week on match and I just wanted to write to as many women who seemed interesting. I stayed away from anyone posing in front of the mirror with a duck face, as those kinds of women and I would not be a match.

But all my messages were thoughtful and respectful. It doesn't mean I deserve a response, they have a right not to respond, but man it sure felt deflating. Especially those 2 that did respond only to stop replying after 1 message.

Now that I went through the site, I'm much more picky to who I write to and it doesn't even faze me.

 

As mentioned, I have a date lined up this week from someone who messaged me and we played a heavy game of tennis, back and forth. So we'll see.

 

Once again, I'm not upset. I just don't don't understand why someone would respond to me in the first place, receive a thoughtful response from me with a question or 2 to keep things going, to only not hear back from them. But hey such is life.

Edited August 30, 2016 by Zeo828

[Michelle ma Belle]

Online dating is nothing more than a virtual shopping mall. All of us go on there and window shop and when we see something pretty in the window that catches our attention, we'll go in and browse a bit, try it on and see if it looks as good up close as it did in the window.

 

The problem with that is that there are countless shops and windows to look at and just when you think you've found that perfect item, there is an even better one next door or two stores down with a better price or with more bedazzle. Attention, again, is fleeting at best online even for those profiles with great selection and pricing and even layaway plans

 

It's disappointing when someone you were keen on suddenly loses interest for whatever reason and without warning but I don't necessarily begrudge them either, at least they made an effort to begin with.

 

When you understand how online dating works and accept how the game is played, it's a lot easier to navigate without becoming overly jaded by the whole process.

[Larryville]

I sent 43 messages in a week, all after reading thier profiles.

I only got 2 responses that, as mentioned, went no where.

 

I’m sorry but ya see this is what I have a serious problem with.

 

Anyone if you are completely and totally honest (Don’t care what OLD site you use) there is NO freaking way you sent 43 messages to 43 women who were absolutely worth messaging and meeting.

 

If that is the case then either you don’t give a damn who you hook up with, or you don’t value yourself.

 

Unless the only thing you are doing is looking at how someone looks there is not that many women in a given area that you are a match with AND who would be a match for YOU. People only look at OLD from their perspective.

 

Factoring age, race, religion, height, weight, hair color, education, hobbies, kids or not, married before or not, employment status, extracurricular activities, relationship habits and there are a ton of other factors if any dude is just randomly messaging women like bobbing for apples of course you are going to be frustrated.

 

I absolutely know because of my race, lack of religion (non-religious) maybe height with some, income for some, age for some there is absolutely no point in trying to contact certain women. Doing so is seriously futile.

 

I say this all the time and while I hate repeating myself the important question for anyone is:

 

“If you (a man in particular) decide you are going to message a woman, ask yourself (if she is everything you think you want) why would she choose to converse with YOU? What makes you think you are worthy of her, (men do the chasing, women do the choosing) what do you bring to the table?

Not judging but asking do you actually think you were worthy of the 43 women you messaged?

[Michelle ma Belle]

I’m sorry but ya see this is what I have a serious problem with.

 

Anyone if you are completely and totally honest (Don’t care what OLD site you use) there is NO freaking way you sent 43 messages to 43 women who were absolutely worth messaging and meeting.

 

If that is the case then either you don’t give a damn who you hook up with, or you don’t value yourself.

 

Unless the only thing you are doing is looking at how someone looks there is not that many women in a given area that you are a match with AND who would be a match for YOU. People only look at OLD from their perspective.

 

Factoring age, race, religion, height, weight, hair color, education, hobbies, kids or not, married before or not, employment status, extracurricular activities, relationship habits and there are a ton of other factors if any dude is just randomly messaging women like bobbing for apples of course you are going to be frustrated.

 

I absolutely know because of my race, lack of religion (non-religious) maybe height with some, income for some, age for some there is absolutely no point in trying to contact certain women. Doing so is seriously futile.

 

I say this all the time and while I hate repeating myself the important question for anyone is:

 

“If you (a man in particular) decide you are going to message a woman, ask yourself (if she is everything you think you want) why would she choose to converse with YOU? What makes you think you are worthy of her, (men do the chasing, women do the choosing) what do you bring to the table?

Not judging but asking do you actually think you were worthy of the 43 women you messaged?

 

Hmm...interesting post and perspective.

 

Speaking as a woman who is used to getting a lot of messages from men of all varieties, I can definitely tell the ones who cast their net wide and send out canned emails hoping to snag just one unsuspecting prospect.

 

Again, everyone has their way of doing things, for better or worse, but to think women don't notice these things or have your number is a pretty big mistake.

[LookAtThisPOst]

I’m sorry but ya see this is what I have a serious problem with.

 

Anyone if you are completely and totally honest (Don’t care what OLD site you use) there is NO freaking way you sent 43 messages to 43 women who were absolutely worth messaging and meeting.

 

If that is the case then either you don’t give a damn who you hook up with, or you don’t value yourself.

 

Unless the only thing you are doing is looking at how someone looks there is not that many women in a given area that you are a match with AND who would be a match for YOU. People only look at OLD from their perspective.

 

Factoring age, race, religion, height, weight, hair color, education, hobbies, kids or not, married before or not, employment status, extracurricular activities, relationship habits and there are a ton of other factors if any dude is just randomly messaging women like bobbing for apples of course you are going to be frustrated.

 

I absolutely know because of my race, lack of religion (non-religious) maybe height with some, income for some, age for some there is absolutely no point in trying to contact certain women. Doing so is seriously futile.

 

I say this all the time and while I hate repeating myself the important question for anyone is:

 

“If you (a man in particular) decide you are going to message a woman, ask yourself (if she is everything you think you want) why would she choose to converse with YOU? What makes you think you are worthy of her, (men do the chasing, women do the choosing) what do you bring to the table?

Not judging but asking do you actually think you were worthy of the 43 women you messaged?

 

I do get what you mean Larryville, I REALLY do...but I used to be the guy that was discerning on who I sent messages to back in the late 2000s. I even well-crafted them to mention things I've noticed in their profile.

 

I would even come across mirror matches of myself when it comes to what I seek in a match. I came across a couple of rare, geek, but cute sci-fi ladies around my age. Some were wearing cosplay outfits at the conventions and mentioned I did the same.

 

In their interests, they'd have board games they are interested in like Settlers of Catan, Dominion....a lot of strategy games I zeroed in on. I thought they were a god send! Same belief systems, too.

 

Only to contact them with a well thought out email, pointing out certain interests in their profile, mentioned certain board games and other fun hobbies only to be ignored.

 

It was rather surprising considering finding a woman into hobbies most men are into. A unicorn rather. lol.

 

I recall a local school teacher, she had a little extra weight on her, we were big movie buffs, she was a science teacher...and I enjoyed that topic.

 

She DID respond, but with, "Sorry, but I'm afraid I don't think we'd be a good match, good luck in your search." (But hey, at least she answered)

 

I replied, "Well, actually that's the reason I contacted you as that according to your write-up we match up in so many ways."

 

No reply after that, but you get the picture.

 

THAT said, eventually these guys will grow weary and just E-Blast every woman within' their geographic search radius just to get a MEET, much less a date. So it's pretty much come to that, and I can kind of get what the 43 message sender is coming from. lol

 

I mean, if a man KNOWS he's nicely matched with a woman that he contacts, but....she thinks you're uggo, bald, short or whatever, you can say good-bye to that half-hour lunch meet.

Edited August 30, 2016 by LookAtThisPOst

[Larryville]

everyone has their way of doing things, for better or worse, but to think women don't notice these things or have your number is a pretty big mistake.

 

Oh MMB I absolutely know women notice. But you know I just posted a response on another thread “Married people don't envy their single friends”

If a guy is sending out 43 messages to women that tells me NONE of the 43 are of value. In the old days that ONE special woman was valued and men coveted them and pursued them with GUSTO!

 

You simply covet and protect things that you value. How someone cares for their home, the car they drive, how they dress, grooming. Even if a guy threw out those 43 messages and hooked ONE, that woman will never be truly valued by him, because when the shine quickly wears off, back on the OLD site to trade up. We all are (victims) of this.

 

LATP, saw just before I hit post:

 

She DID respond, but with, "Sorry, but I'm afraid I don't think we'd be a good match, good luck in your search."

 

I got messages like that and I can tell you from experience, that particular woman really does not want to meet anyone and is only on OLD to test to see if she is worthy of anyone’s attention and to avoid “bad Karma” for lack of better expression, at least replies. I say again a significant number of women are only on OLD as entertainment, NOT to actually meet anyone.

This is what I wish so many dudes here would get and it is easy to tell which women would be a complete waste of time even contacting.

[LookAtThisPOst]

You simply covet and protect things that you value. How someone cares for their home, the car they drive, how they dress, grooming. Even if a guy threw out those 43 messages and hooked ONE, that woman will never be truly valued by him, because when the shine quickly wears off, back on the OLD site to trade up. We all are (victims) of this.

 

The thing is though...it's not about valuing someone, it's just snaggin' quick 30-min. lunch meet n greet with the lass. That's all! lol