Joebloggs91 Posted August 28, 2016 Posted August 28, 2016 So it feels like I've never been away.... Some of you may remember me from my last stint on here back in March after I was dumped after a whirlwind 6 month relationship. I'm back again, and those horrible feelings are back although mainly for different reasons. Cliche I know but I genuinely thought this girl and I were in it for the long haul. Only been a few months, but I learnt from my previous 'whirlwind' that I would take it a lot slower. She lives approx 200 miles away, we probably saw each other 5/6 times over the course of the few months. It works for me because I work a lot. I work around 50 miles from home so I normally spend 3/4 hours a day travelling, on top of a 10/11 hour working day. She works hard too. We started getting more serious and because of that she's pulled the plug, saying that she can't do long distance relationships etc. I respect that and was dignified and didn't argue. (Obviously I challenged her on it and suggested a few alternatives, which she declined) whether it is the long distance or not only she knows, but boy am I in a mess. I moved back in with my parents around 6 weeks ago because I need to save up for my own place. So my independence has gone. I've also got glandular fever which has knocked me for 6 and has bed ridden me for the past week. All my mates are in long term relationships so going out isn't regular, and since I broke up with my ex from March I was promoted into a new role with work. There isn't the possibility of that at the moment and my social life has taken a hit as a result. This is why this girl was perfect for where I am at with life. Being dumped twice in a year is a massive dent to self esteem and especially being a guy it has damaged my ego somewhat. It's almost 01:30 in the morning here and I can't sleep, I can't stop thinking about her and what she's up to (i hate that) I've deleted Facebook temporarily (worked last time) but it's annoyed me that I've had to do that. I'd just picked myself back up again and boom I'm hit again. It has actually brought up feelings for my ex back in March. Writing it all down helps me tenfold so no apologies for the story, but advice on how I can pick myself up again will be appreciated.
somegu Posted August 29, 2016 Posted August 29, 2016 First focus on your health and get healthy. You can't do anything if you are sick and bed ridden. Focus on appreciating what you do have in your life and what does bring you joy don't lay around in bed feeling sorry for yourself. Contact your friends who are having problems and support them and you will realize it is not all about you. Everyone has problems and a lot of people have bigger problems than you do. That is not to marginalize what you are going through because it is your life and it is real and painful. But think how lucky you are to have parents that support you and a job where you can earn money to save up for your own place. Join a club that does a hobby/sport/activity that you love and make new single friends there. Get out there and see what life has to offer you. Write down what you can't get out of your head because that will help get it out of your head just start writing until you don't need to write any more. Feel your negative emotions but don't wallow in them. Things will get better if you take care of yourself.
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