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Posted

got this man in my life who have been seeing for about 6 yrs through 2 relationships (of his) the first he finished with for me

 

things didn't turn out too well

 

then he met the girl he is with now.

 

we carried on being friends, which is when we started to get to know each other well - (without the pressure)

 

we have ended up being really close, as in the best friends in the world , but there is always some romance involved not usually sex - more intimate than that -

 

but he wont go the whole nine yards

 

 

the girlfriend had big strop because he spends all his time with me and went to live in another country

 

he has lost his job and is going to join her there, although he admits it is probably not the best idea in the world.

 

i think in all honesty it will do him good as i know what it is like to just want to run away as far as you can from all you problems (i have done it myself) but obviously i want him to stay

 

basically i just dont get it

Posted

Well, As you said he has no job.

 

No Job = No money

 

No money = No house

 

No house = ... bad stuff.

 

Basicly moving there with her seems like the best idea in the world from a Financial perspective.

  • Author
Posted

is that the right reason to go though, if things were good between them she wouldn't be at the other side of the world in the first place would she

 

and more importantly, what about me (us)

Posted

I don't want to be the one to break this to you but...

 

He doesn't have to love her to live with her. He doesn't even have to like her. He just has to pretend too.

 

 

But, I'm sure he already does like her, If not love her. And he will have plenty of time to grow fond of her in the time he will be living with her.

 

 

I hate to be the one to say this but, The chances of you getting together with him are slim to none, Seeing as he will be moving far away and living at HER house.

 

The only way you could possibly get him to stay is if you offer what he's getting from her. Same living arrangements.

 

 

But... He seem's ready to give you up in order to live with the other chick.

 

 

 

 

...... I'm sorry.

  • Author
Posted

yes thanks for the reality check

 

he keeps asking to see me, we usually see each other at weekends, although we live about 5 hours away from each other

 

we have talked about spending a week or so together before he goes

 

and by the way they have been together for 4 yrs and all she has ever wanted is for them to live together and he has sucessfully managed to aviod it so far

 

what should my final words be to him

Posted

what should my final words be to him

i would tell him how i feel at least that way u wont regret it ,

and u gave him the opp if he has feelings hes holding back

  • Author
Posted

thank you

 

maybe i will go see him for a few days , its hard to get him to admit to his feelings but i am the only one who can (eventually)

 

i actually think he should go, but treat it as a holiday- which i think he is doing to be honest

 

i want him to know that it is ok to change his mind and come back home if it turns out that his world isn't going to change that much

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