healthyhopes Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 (edited) About one month ago I had a job where I met a lot of new friends, including this one guy who I thought was pretty cool who we'll call "E". Unbeknownst to me, he had a crush on me and was asking my friend for advice on what to do with this "mystery girl" and how to approach me (she guessed he hadn't dated much). We texted for about a week, and then he asked me to lunch. I declined as I didn't sleep much/at all for two days beforehand, and then promptly got fired from my job (lol. I swear it was nothing I did, they were just cutting extra weight is the general consensus) so from that point on, I didn't see him face to face for a long while-- about a month. Apparently he took this as total rejection, was hurt, and stopped texting me at all. About a week later I heard about this from my friend, and initiated contact with him again. We don't talk much now, mainly just small snapchats here and there, or strings of text conversation, but it doesn't seem like he isn't into me anymore. Then again he might just be bad at texting. But mixed signals are negative signals, right? Yesterday I hung out with him (he initiated this), had a good/okay time, and I do want to see him again. I have a crush on him now :/. He was very nice and said he was going to give a small present and wanted to see me later. He said we could see a movie later, and he suggested later in the day yesterday but then we agreed on later in the week. Since he was so sensitive for rejection before, I am afraid he feels rejected again, due to how I worded things. Either that, or he's not into me. It's hard for me to tell. We haven't spoken since the hangout. What would you do in this situation? Edited August 18, 2016 by healthyhopes
preraph Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 If he has a present, he likes you. But be careful because if he's that sensitive, well, that usually goes along with problematic insecurity and sometimes anger problems, so don't jump into anything with this guy before you know what he's really like. I mean, you don't want a "touchy" boyfriend that gets sulled up about every little thing, do you ? 2
smackie9 Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 He lacks experience and has no confidence. Don't ever expect this guy to really take the lead. He is insecure....he had to ask his friend how to approach you...so stupid having someone else do the foot work.....lame.
mbee Posted August 19, 2016 Posted August 19, 2016 Yeah this guy sounds like he's pretty insecure in dating arena and has a hard time initiating with women. Personally this would not bother me much. I've dated a couple of guys like this and they typically start getting confidence once the third date and kissing starts to happen. However, yes as one poster said, it could be a sign of bigger insecurity issues potentially but everyone is different. Yet if you like the guy to take the lead, then keep in mind that things may go at a snail's pace while you both figure out how interested you both really are.
Author healthyhopes Posted September 13, 2016 Author Posted September 13, 2016 Ugh. We've been talking of course, every day for a while. We're both in college now, two hours away from each other. Three days ago, the conversation ended up with him admitting that he likes me, and that he would like to go on a date with me. And then he said, "now it's really sad that you're so far away" He said that he would love to take me on a date, but had no idea how he could make it to where I'm at. He said that we could still stay in touch with calls, video chats, etc until we both get back home on break, where we would go on some dates. The issue is, is that if I don't contact him first he doesn't contact me either. And so we haven't talked at all for the past two days. I don't know what to do. My vibe is that I should just not contact him for a while until he either contacts me or I move on. Then again, last time I didn't talk to him for a while (as mentioned earlier) he said he was worried that I hated him. So I don't know what to do. He's either a liar or a coward, or just absent headed, and this whole thing is making me feel scared that perhaps he doesn't really like me either. Some friends suggested talking to him about it, others suggested just not contacting him. I feel a bad vibe either way. What should I do?
Author healthyhopes Posted September 14, 2016 Author Posted September 14, 2016 the general consensus from people I've talked to would be to just leave him alone and not talk to him... though that worries me...
ThisOverThat Posted September 14, 2016 Posted September 14, 2016 the general consensus from people I've talked to would be to just leave him alone and not talk to him... though that worries me... Yup. Turn the page. No one that lives closer than the two hours is showing you signs of interest?
Author healthyhopes Posted September 14, 2016 Author Posted September 14, 2016 Yup. Turn the page. No one that lives closer than the two hours is showing you signs of interest? Okay. You sure that's a good idea? I don't want him to think I hate him again or anything like that. It's just so strange that someone would ask you out and then the whole thing would go into radio silence, though I guess the same goes for him on his side too. No, at least not yet. I just started college a week ago and I don't know anyone really
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