lamar_84 Posted July 3, 2005 Posted July 3, 2005 MY EX EMAILS ME OUT THE BLUE, I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW SHE GOT MY EMAIL ADDRESS, BUT ANYWAY SHE SENDS ME AN EMAIL ASKING ME HOW IM DOING, TELLING ME THAT SHE STILL HAS PICTURES OF ME. SHE TRYED TO SEND ME A PICTURE OF HER BABY( SHE BROKE UP WITH ME AND GOT PREGNANT FROM SOME GUY RIGHT AFTER,THEN GOT ENGAGED TO HIM). IM WONDERING WHY DID SHE OUT OF NO WHERE EMAIL ME AFTER ABOUT 8 MONTHS, AND WHY DID SHE TRY TO SEND ME A PICTURE OF HER BABY PROBABLY KNOWING THAT I DIDNT WANT TO SEE IT????? NEED YOUR HELP!!!!!
d'Arthez Posted July 3, 2005 Posted July 3, 2005 Please no captials. It is considered to be shouting, and it is highly annoying. It will decrease the number of responses you will get to your thread. I abhor shouting, but this time I make an exception. She might have found the email address anywhere. It is irrelevant. Your ex and you have gone separate ways, and depending on the cause of your break up (it could have been reasonably okay, or a total disaster from her perspective) she wants to keep in touch with you, not more than as friends though. What may have been a terrible experience to you, does not necessarily have to have been a terrible experience to her. Do with that knowledge what you want to do. Contact her or not. That is your decision. As for the wisdom of contacting her, judging by your writing it would be best not to contact her in any form. Just ignore the email completely.
Author lamar_84 Posted July 4, 2005 Author Posted July 4, 2005 Sorry about the caps... Im in the military and we only use caps so now its a habit.... I replied to her messege but didnt mention anything about the picture she tryed to send. She kept asking me if i recieved it. She also said she wonders what would have happened if things went another way.. When i asked her what did she mean by that she said she don't know.. I'm confused!!!
LucreziaBorgia Posted July 4, 2005 Posted July 4, 2005 She kept asking me if i recieved it. She also said she wonders what would have happened if things went another way.. She wants you to rescue her from a situation that she now wishes she hadn't gotten herself into - she likely saw that the grass only appeared greener over there. Careful though - wishing to be rescued and actually going along with the escape plan are two entirely different things. I would wager her thoughts of you are way up into the 'idealistic' right now - something she thinks she can't have, but wants. As soon as its offered, and she takes it - it won't be long before she is "confused" again. She's not running to you. She's running from someone else. Bad situation all around. You can avoid the entire mess by letting her know that you don't get involved with other people's fiancees, blocking her email, and putting this firmly behind you before it has a chance to snowball into some ugly mess.
Author lamar_84 Posted July 4, 2005 Author Posted July 4, 2005 I still dont understand why she emailed me after all this time. She also asked my when am i coming back to the U.S.( Im currently stationed in Japan). I can't stop thinking about her, and her emailing me didn't help....Does anyone have any ideas??
Candy Cane Posted July 4, 2005 Posted July 4, 2005 I think she's reaching out for comfort and some attention. In the past, when I was in a relationship that was having some difficult times, I'd call an old beau who would give me some attention and make me feel better. Sometimes I still do. In fact, I might call one right now. I'm kidding, of course. It's way too late to call. I'll call tomorrow. Seriously though, I think you're setting yourself up if you are reading more into it than what it really is. She's using you for comfort and probably not much more. If you don't care, then milk it for all it's worth. Just don't be surprised when she doesn't stick around for the long haul.
Author lamar_84 Posted July 4, 2005 Author Posted July 4, 2005 Yeah i understand. I think she was just trying to get in my head because after the end of her note she put "love ya, and love always". She should be telling me that especially after how she did me dirty.
VirginiaBob Posted July 4, 2005 Posted July 4, 2005 Go to a strip club and talk to the hottest woman there and offer to give her $100 to put on a wedding dress and take a photograph with you (in your tux). Send your ex this picture in your reply to her email
LucreziaBorgia Posted July 4, 2005 Posted July 4, 2005 No new contacts = no new hurts. As long as she is with some other man, none of her words matter. If she starts backing up those words with action: she breaks her engagement, moves out on her own, sets up visitation and CS, and is legitimately ready and able to have a real relationship with you... then, and only then can you trust her words. Otherwise, you are just another OM in someone else's relationship. No sense in volunteering for that position.
outdated Posted July 4, 2005 Posted July 4, 2005 Originally posted by VirginiaBob Go to a strip club and talk to the hottest woman there and offer to give her $100 to put on a wedding dress and take a photograph with you (in your tux). Send your ex this picture in your reply to her email Brilliant! F@#$ing brilliant. I say do it.
babygurl Posted July 6, 2005 Posted July 6, 2005 well maybe she wants u to see her child and lert u no how she is doing support her don't hate her. maybe she wants to see u again, or maybe ur friends gave her ur email. but don't hate her cuz of taht she is just wanting u to see how she is and see her first child and stuff.
Author lamar_84 Posted July 6, 2005 Author Posted July 6, 2005 I still love her alot. I just dont want to see a picture of her baby because it will just bring back memories. Im always thinking about her. I dont think its healthy for me to see the picture. She asked me to send her a picture of me and she will send me one of her..I dont have a problem with that.. Is it wrong that i dont want to see a picture of her baby??
Neptune Posted July 6, 2005 Posted July 6, 2005 Uh, baby after 8 months? I think you should do the math. There may be more to this than you realize!
d'Arthez Posted July 6, 2005 Posted July 6, 2005 He meant that you were broken up for 8 months with her, and a normal pregnancy takes 9 months. In short that she would have to be pregnant when you broke finally broke up. As I and others understand it, the 8 months referred to a period that you had no contact with her.
Neptune Posted July 6, 2005 Posted July 6, 2005 From reading the original post I get the impression that they broke up 8 months ago. So, if she has a baby now that would be 9+ months ago that she got pregnant. Probably they just have not communicated in 8 months and the breakup was longer than that. So, in a way, I was sort of joking when I said that. But if they in fact have only been broke up 8 months then it raises some serious questions.
Author lamar_84 Posted July 6, 2005 Author Posted July 6, 2005 I think you guys misunderstood me. She had the baby last year in december, which means that she got pregnant sometime around march. We broke up in Feb. I didnt have sex either of those two months. After i found out she was pregnant by this other guy i still kept in contact with her until i found out she was engaged to him, thats when i stopped talking to her. After about 8 months of nc, she just up and writes me asking me how im doing, and when am i coming back home. Putting love ya, and love always after her messenges...i was wondering why after all that time, when shes suppose to be engaged.
Neptune Posted July 6, 2005 Posted July 6, 2005 Right, it is good that is what it is. It is not unusual to be taking a step foward and looking backward at the same time. I guess it is part of the decision making process and who knows, she may yet hope to work it out with you rather than this other guy.
Author lamar_84 Posted July 6, 2005 Author Posted July 6, 2005 As much as i love her and want to i know i cant. Did I mention that was the second time she got pregnant from someone else. The first one she didnt keep! After all that I still cant stop thinking about her. I took orders to Japan to get away for a while, but things seems worst, because i hate it here..
westernxer Posted July 6, 2005 Posted July 6, 2005 Originally posted by lamar_84 Is it wrong that i dont want to see a picture of her baby?? No. Baby ain't yours.
lvgrl Posted July 6, 2005 Posted July 6, 2005 Originally posted by westernxer No. Baby ain't yours. not only are you hot, but your a smartass...i like it..
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