Guitarisgood Posted August 17, 2016 Posted August 17, 2016 I've known her from afar and hence always felt there was some what of an attraction there in between the stares and what not. One night at a function, she drunkenly grabbed my phone, put her number in it and planned to go home with me. Thing is I got caught up and never picked up. She got angry. We continued to text and planned coffee, then rescheduled to dinner. Both times, she made excuses but added in the replies that she was keen. I let it go then one night she sent me this message she came out to her family. At this point, I died back my communication; kept it light and maintaining pleasantries as she upped her messaging me. She's now asked me out on the weekend. So whats the go with this? I am so confused.
DramaInPajamas Posted August 17, 2016 Posted August 17, 2016 (edited) Are you a man or a woman? If you are a woman, are you gay? In any case, the question is regardless of your gender or sexual orientation, is are you interested? If she is a gay woman and you are a man, is she just experimenting and not serious. I have to say though, her pushiness towards you would turn me right off. It comes across as desperate. On the one hand she wants you to go home together, then she makes dates and backs out. Hot / cold. Pushy/pully. She has only just come out out her family. Let her sort her affairs out. Edited August 17, 2016 by DramaInPajamas
Author Guitarisgood Posted August 17, 2016 Author Posted August 17, 2016 Thanks for the reply A male actually and hence am attracted to her. Since that message, she has not made one mention after. Well, do I go out with her or not? I'm not one for wasting my effort.
DramaInPajamas Posted August 17, 2016 Posted August 17, 2016 Thanks for the reply A male actually and hence am attracted to her. Since that message, she has not made one mention after. Well, do I go out with her or not? I'm not one for wasting my effort. Well what do you want? Do you want a fling with a gay woman: some guys like that kind of thing. Or do you want to date this woman. Do you like her and want more than casual or a fling? She has come out to her family. She could be bi. Are you happy with this? Do you want a relationship were someone could change their mind about being with a man? Do you want a serious relationship with her?
Grisho Posted August 17, 2016 Posted August 17, 2016 Nothing to be confused about. If she's a lesbian, don't think anything will develop between you. Assume friendship is your only option. Focus your search for a partner on hetero and bi women.
jen1447 Posted August 17, 2016 Posted August 17, 2016 You say she's a lesbian ....does she self-identify as that specifically, or is that just a generalization that she likes women? If she's actually bi, then I don't see any particular issue here. If she really does identify as lesbian and yet she's fooling w you, I'd be cautious bc that seems to show she has some identity issues. (Those can bug out in negative ways down the line - at some point she'll have to deal w her 'lesbianism' and that might be by sending you packing, etc.)
NTV Posted August 17, 2016 Posted August 17, 2016 Dude. If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, smells like a duck, then it's a duck. She may be going through a hard time with her sexual identity. Or she may be truly unstable. Don't take the risk. The best advice I can ever give anyone on anything is this: Never let the crazy in.
preraph Posted August 17, 2016 Posted August 17, 2016 Listen, overt situations call for overt reactions. Why don't you just either text or call her and say, "Lady, I have never been so confused. WTF do you want from me?"
Recommended Posts