Relationship for Indian man

[Naveen2016]

Hey guys...my name is Naveen (Indian guy) and I'm new to Australia. I'm 31 years old and I'm trying to get an Aussie girlfriend. I'm not stupid. I know its extremely hard especially coming from where I come from but what would be the best way to go about this. Most of them seem kind of closed off and busy always looking at their phones n stuff. Any advice on where n how to meet aussie girls for relationships? I tried Tinder but the girls are not swiping right on my photo lol

[Cherryz]

Maybe focus on just socializing.

Since you are new also, its a good way for many reasons.

 

While doing that you get to meet many people and some friends and also its a relaxed way for people to know you and you them.Also you get to know the culture, mentality of the girls there too.

And that way you get to know girls also and if you see someone that you like you

can go from there etc.

[Just a Guy]

Hi Naveen, what are you doing in Australia? Are you a student or are you an immigrant working there? Why don't you look for an Indian origin girl there? Just curious.

[bummer]

Gooood luck. Unless you have amazing Shah Khan like looks, you will blend into the background of all the other Asian immigrants in Australia. Best bet is find a tiny niche where your personality can shine. If you have interesting hobbies with a small active group, that is your best place to make a girl laugh and get your foot in the door. Oh, or friends of friends. Hang out with other Indian friends who are already established in Aus who have friends already and flirt with them.

 

As for tinder or bar-chatting with an average white chick in Aus or the US, Canada, or anywhere, you are fighting the good fight with the rest of us.

[preraph]

You should just focus on making a few friends so your social circle expands. I mean, most people are not seeking to date outside their own ethnicity, but if they just met you in a natural way through friends, you might attract someone that way. Meanwhile, date Indian women. They're so pretty and nice, the few I've known. You can always seek ones that are nontraditional, if that is why you are trying to avoid them.

[Shining One]

Meanwhile, date Indian women. They're so pretty and nice, the few I've known. You can always seek ones that are nontraditional, if that is why you are trying to avoid them.

While I'm not in Australia, I imagine the OP will face similar problems as I do in the US. Many non-traditional Indian women will avoid Indian men because they don't want a traditional Indian man. Furthermore, Indian women generally have no problems attracting non-Indian men, so their dating pool is much larger.

[Springsummer]

I know an Indian who has no problem getting white girlfriends....but he told us he was a model...so...

 

one of my white female friend was crazy physically attracted to him, but he wasn't even interested.

Edited August 17, 2016 by Springsummer

[Shining One]

I know an Indian who has no problem getting white girlfriends....but he told us he was a model...so...

It's certainly not unheard of. Most of the women I've dated are white and my current girlfriend is white. It just takes more effort to find those women. I ask out a lot more women to compensate for my lower response rate. My current girlfriend was nearly the 200th woman I had messaged that month on Match.

[Springsummer]

It's certainly not unheard of. Most of the women I've dated are white and my current girlfriend is white. It just takes more effort to find those women. I ask out a lot more women to compensate for my lower response rate. My current girlfriend was nearly the 200th woman I had messaged that month on Match.

 

lol...that Indian guy I know doesn't need to ask around girls...he was a MODEL.

[Shining One]

lol...that Indian guy I know doesn't need to ask around girls...he was a MODEL.

Understood. I'm providing my experience as someone who is not model material.

[Springsummer]

Understood. I'm providing my experience as someone who is not model material.

 

have to say I did feel hot when he tried to hug me when watching tv...sigh...

[preraph]

While I'm not in Australia, I imagine the OP will face similar problems as I do in the US. Many non-traditional Indian women will avoid Indian men because they don't want a traditional Indian man. Furthermore, Indian women generally have no problems attracting non-Indian men, so their dating pool is much larger.

 

No, I know it's not easy. People usually date within their ethnicity. But it's not unheard of. A nice couple down the street, the father is Indian and he's popular in our neighborhood and well accepted, and we are in Texas. I have a cousin who's been married for decades to an Indian man, happily. But no matter what the ethnicity, most people simply aren't attracted to people outside their race or ethnicity, especially women, I think.

[Naveen2016]

No, I know it's not easy. People usually date within their ethnicity. But it's not unheard of. A nice couple down the street, the father is Indian and he's popular in our neighborhood and well accepted, and we are in Texas. I have a cousin who's been married for decades to an Indian man, happily. But no matter what the ethnicity, most people simply aren't attracted to people outside their race or ethnicity, especially women, I think.

 

 

Maybe in most cases....except when it comes to white male and asian female. This is a weird combination I keep seeing all the time but never the other way around. Its usually one way traffic when it comes to most of these IR relationships.

[Imported]

I'm half Asian half white. I don't understand guys wanting white women only, assuming when you said "Aussie girlfriend", you actually meant a white girl. I go for women that I think are attractive looking, seems nice and is receptive to me. Many times that turned out to be a white girl, but I didn't go for them because they are white. I give equal opportunity to women of all races. So long as they're hot. And not too crazy.

[Naveen2016]

I'm half Asian half white. I don't understand guys wanting white women only, assuming when you said "Aussie girlfriend", you actually meant a white girl. I go for women that I think are attractive looking, seems nice and is receptive to me. Many times that turned out to be a white girl, but I didn't go for them because they are white. I give equal opportunity to women of all races. So long as they're hot. And not too crazy.

 

 

I find a higher percentage of white women attractive than girls of other races. There are beautiful east asian and indian and african girls but they are a small percentage. I don't think being receptive means anything. I remember approaching this girl and it really felt like she wanted to talk a lot n was receptive and everything. Then later when i asked for her number she gave me that look like "how dare you?". Girls could also be receptive if they want you in their friend zone.

[Shining One]

I find a higher percentage of white women attractive than girls of other races. There are beautiful east asian and indian and african girls but they are a small percentage.

You'll be facing even more of an uphill struggle then. You will have to approach a significantly higher number of women to see results.

[Els]

Most people who are completely unwilling to date people of their race is going to have a hard time. Don't say you weren't warned.

 

Anyway. From what I've seen... Huge generalization here, but appearance, muscles (not The Rock, but decent muscle tone), excellent social skills, and good fashion sense seems to increase most men's chances with many Caucasian women. Doesn't hurt to be tall either.

[Naveen2016]

Most people who are completely unwilling to date people of their race is going to have a hard time. Don't say you weren't warned.

 

Anyway. From what I've seen... Huge generalization here, but appearance, muscles (not The Rock, but decent muscle tone), excellent social skills, and good fashion sense seems to increase most men's chances with many Caucasian women. Doesn't hurt to be tall either.

 

 

Well its not like Indian girls are gonna make life any easier for me in Australia. They have high standards too coz they have more options for dating in Australia compared to Indian men. But I'm not afraid of failure. I have approached girls confidently with that nothing to lose attitude and one of them even gave me her number only to block me later on when i tried to call. All this tells me that this is going to end very badly for me. I don't care. Being loved by the opposite sex is not everything in life as many people make it out to be.My family loves me and that's all I really care about. I'm ok with being single and not being desired by anyone. It doesn't scare me...maybe it will after I reach old age.

[Els]

Well its not like Indian girls are gonna make life any easier for me in Australia. They have high standards too coz they have more options for dating in Australia compared to Indian men. But I'm not afraid of failure. I have approached girls confidently with that nothing to lose attitude and one of them even gave me her number only to block me later on when i tried to call. All this tells me that this is going to end very badly for me. I don't care. Being loved by the opposite sex is not everything in life as many people make it out to be.My family loves me and that's all I really care about. I'm ok with being single and not being desired by anyone. It doesn't scare me...maybe it will after I reach old age.

 

I'm not saying that Indian girls have 'lower standards' - in fact, I'm sure they don't. They have their own requirements as well, albeit perhaps slightly different ones.

 

What I'm saying is that LOTS of people are put off by folks who have a thing against the opposite gender of their race. Aside from that, dating outside your culture is undeniably more difficult.

[mikeylo]

Dude, you need to have game to get a white women. I've seen many Indian guys with white women and it's widely accepted. No offense but those dudes have plenty of money. That is one major reason.

 

That said, I've yet to see an Indian woman with a white man. I guess it would be very different set of minds meeting together. Since I've never seen in my 50 odd years ( and I've traveled around ) , I wouldn't know the reason and if I ever see an odd couple, I'll definitely ask them why, how , lol ! They will raise many eyebrows.

 

Generally people date/ marry within same race. So anyone going outside will make people wonder and question. One needs to be strong and self aware enough to get past that.

 

So dude,get some game.

[Shining One]

That said, I've yet to see an Indian woman with a white man. I guess it would be very different set of minds meeting together. Since I've never seen in my 50 odd years ( and I've traveled around ) , I wouldn't know the reason and if I ever see an odd couple, I'll definitely ask them why, how , lol !

My sister is married to a white man. Three of my female cousins are dating white men. My West Indian coworker is engaged to a white man. It's fairly common among the non-traditional Indian women I know.

[Naveen2016]

Dude, you need to have game to get a white women. I've seen many Indian guys with white women and it's widely accepted. No offense but those dudes have plenty of money. That is one major reason.

 

That said, I've yet to see an Indian woman with a white man. I guess it would be very different set of minds meeting together. Since I've never seen in my 50 odd years ( and I've traveled around ) , I wouldn't know the reason and if I ever see an odd couple, I'll definitely ask them why, how , lol ! They will raise many eyebrows.

 

Generally people date/ marry within same race. So anyone going outside will make people wonder and question. One needs to be strong and self aware enough to get past that.

 

So dude,get some game.

 

 

I think I have game. I'm confident. I can speak well. But like you said you have to be a really rich Indian guy or a model or something to get an average white girl. Thats the trade off.

[preraph]

Well its not like Indian girls are gonna make life any easier for me in Australia. They have high standards too coz they have more options for dating in Australia compared to Indian men. But I'm not afraid of failure. I have approached girls confidently with that nothing to lose attitude and one of them even gave me her number only to block me later on when i tried to call. All this tells me that this is going to end very badly for me. I don't care. Being loved by the opposite sex is not everything in life as many people make it out to be.My family loves me and that's all I really care about. I'm ok with being single and not being desired by anyone. It doesn't scare me...maybe it will after I reach old age.

 

You seem like a nice person, and you will find someone. Just try not to make it be this type or that skin color. Keep your eyes open for people who seem friendly to you and don't overlook someone because you're focused on one dream girl. But you're right: Romance isn't everything. So keep pursuing all your passions and activities you enjoy and don't let it get you down.

[normal person]

Well its not like Indian girls are gonna make life any easier for me in Australia. They have high standards too coz they have more options for dating in Australia compared to Indian men. But I'm not afraid of failure. I have approached girls confidently with that nothing to lose attitude and one of them even gave me her number only to block me later on when i tried to call. All this tells me that this is going to end very badly for me..

 

You're conflating "approaching" and "it's difficult to date as an Indian in western cultures." You're assuming that if you approach someone and they don't like you, it's because you're Indian and/or they're Australian and you're at a disadvantage.

 

I see a lot of this from guys from Eastern cultures, even in some recent threads. They'll "approach" western girls, most likely with some banal conversation that does nothing, have no luck, and say "Ugh, white girls are so stuck up and picky and rude. I went up to them and talked but they won't go out with me."

 

The fact of the matter is, merely "approaching" someone is far from a magic bullet to getting a girl's attention in western society. In fact, I think it's a pretty bad way of doing things.

 

Consider this: the mere fact that you have to "approach" someone lessens your social and sexual capital as it's basically just a huge acknowledgement that no women will pay attention to you any other way, so you have to step into some stranger's space and get their attention. Any time you're asking for someone's attention rather than being asked for yours, you are lessening yourself in their eyes.

 

Also, consider the percentage of people out there who will find any specific person (you, in the case) attractive. It might be 3 or 4% at the most. So if you "approached" 50 women, only 1 or 2 would even have the baseline of receptivity to you anyways. Then, on top of that, you expect that you'll be able to win them over with words, or God forbid, some moronic pick up line -- the fact that you think "approaching" is a good idea in the first place demonstrates a lack of judgment and because of that, I'd wager that like most people, you're probably not going to be able convert ambivalence to romantic interest through a brief conversation.

 

So my if you're having bad luck with "approaches," maybe it's not because you're Indian. More likely it's because "approaching" is usually a losing game. If you have to wave your arms and get someone's attention for them to notice you, take a step back, and reevaluate things -- do things that will get them to come and prove themselves to you you, rather than the other way around. Then you won't have any problems. But please don't think it's as simple as walking up to someone and talking, regardless of race.

 

Best of luck.

[Naveen2016]

You're conflating "approaching" and "it's difficult to date as an Indian in western cultures." You're assuming that if you approach someone and they don't like you, it's because you're Indian and/or they're Australian and you're at a disadvantage.

 

I see a lot of this from guys from Eastern cultures, even in some recent threads. They'll "approach" western girls, most likely with some banal conversation that does nothing, have no luck, and say "Ugh, white girls are so stuck up and picky and rude. I went up to them and talked but they won't go out with me."

 

The fact of the matter is, merely "approaching" someone is far from a magic bullet to getting a girl's attention in western society. In fact, I think it's a pretty bad way of doing things.

 

Consider this: the mere fact that you have to "approach" someone lessens your social and sexual capital as it's basically just a huge acknowledgement that no women will pay attention to you any other way, so you have to step into some stranger's space and get their attention. Any time you're asking for someone's attention rather than being asked for yours, you are lessening yourself in their eyes.

 

Also, consider the percentage of people out there who will find any specific person (you, in the case) attractive. It might be 3 or 4% at the most. So if you "approached" 50 women, only 1 or 2 would even have the baseline of receptivity to you anyways. Then, on top of that, you expect that you'll be able to win them over with words, or God forbid, some moronic pick up line -- the fact that you think "approaching" is a good idea in the first place demonstrates a lack of judgment and because of that, I'd wager that like most people, you're probably not going to be able convert ambivalence to romantic interest through a brief conversation.

 

So my if you're having bad luck with "approaches," maybe it's not because you're Indian. More likely it's because "approaching" is usually a losing game. If you have to wave your arms and get someone's attention for them to notice you, take a step back, and reevaluate things -- do things that will get them to come and prove themselves to you you, rather than the other way around. Then you won't have any problems. But please don't think it's as simple as walking up to someone and talking, regardless of race.

 

Best of luck.

 

 

 

I don't know what you are trying to say here. The general advice I get from most people is don't just be shy and sit around if you see a pretty girl. If you like someone go up and start a conversation and see how it goes. And in the west men approach 99% of the time and get some form of communication like a phone number or email or something and go from there. What you are saying is sit around and they should come up to you to start a conversation. That's not going to happen unless I'm a celebrity like Will Smith or Bill Gates. What you are saying might happen in a corporate environment where people know your position and your power but not on the street or in a club.