PhoPor Posted August 10, 2016 Posted August 10, 2016 or is it just me? I feel like my gf is hiding something and she isn't being all entirely truthful. I will call her RI. We have been dating in LDR for four years, she's 26 from Oregan, and I'm 25 from Arizona. We had a break up in February of our second year dating but got back together august and have been together ever since. Our relationship is good for the most part but lately she has gotten defensive when i ask, what did you do? With whom? She calls me controlling when really, any couple has the right to know this. We also got in a big fight our last visit over cooking because she said I don't listen to her and I'm not manly. She has become extremely defensive about her phone password protecting it and telling me to respect her privacy, which to an extent I understand. And now she's telling me not to post pictures of us or call her babe because it's unprofessional and she has employers. She said I could comment as long as it's by her first name only and I don't get mushy lovey. and then about a week ago, she never told me this. But she made an artwork for a guy(I will call him SA) about two years ago during our breakup, and changed it to her profile picture. The problem here is this guy would always comment on her facebook posts and like things, so I was suspicious but she played it off and called me jealous. I found out when SA posted "I have this in my room" She claimed that the drawing wasn't for him specifically, but a contest in which he won. She also said she put it as her profile picture, not for him, but because she wants to show off her artwork. I find it very weird though because of all people HE won during the time when he was all over her facebook and she would comment back. And it's just so convinient I can't find the post about the contest, because she said she deleted it. There just seems more to this than meets the eye.... In high school, she used to like him, but they went on one date and he rejected her when she asked him out. She claims to not like him anymore, but all signs seem to be pointing the other way. I messaged SA in private, and as polite as possible, I asked him what was going on. He immediately went on the defensive, calling me a creep and to give RI Space.He told me he didnt know RI. That was a lie though... So I don't know. My gf says we're not broken up, but isn't showing me love or affection until I fix things. She claims to be telling the truth, and I want to believe her, but my gut is saying to just leave... 1
whatnot Posted August 10, 2016 Posted August 10, 2016 PhoPor... Been there, done that (twice). LDR/LTR. Once those wheels come off there's no puttin' 'em back on. You can drag the wagon a ways...but you already know. She's just not that into you (any longer). Sorry to have to be the one...
Silver_star Posted August 10, 2016 Posted August 10, 2016 Your gut instinct is always onto something. If you feel like something is off...it usually is. I know you have a strong emotional attachment to her, but LDR's suffer because there is a very big missing aspect to the relationship and after a period of time..one person seeks to fill that void. LDR's are a means to an end, one way or another.
Author PhoPor Posted August 10, 2016 Author Posted August 10, 2016 PhoPor... Been there, done that (twice). LDR/LTR. Once those wheels come off there's no puttin' 'em back on. You can drag the wagon a ways...but you already know. She's just not that into you (any longer). Sorry to have to be the one... Great Analogy. Honestly, I just feel like I can't be pulling anymore. It's nice to think my relationship could be the future I wanted, but there just comes a point when it's not worth worrying about anymore. Don't worry, you're not the first. My sisters told me bluntly "She doesn't care about you" Btw, I'm sorry about what you went through.
Author PhoPor Posted August 10, 2016 Author Posted August 10, 2016 Your gut instinct is always onto something. If you feel like something is off...it usually is. I know you have a strong emotional attachment to her, but LDR's suffer because there is a very big missing aspect to the relationship and after a period of time..one person seeks to fill that void. LDR's are a means to an end, one way or another. If she didn't cheat, or anything, then at the very most, she's just disrespecting me and not treating me the way I deserve. And for the void, it's most likely emotional. I guess that's the one thing holding me back though from breaking up. I'm just hoping for the relationship we once had. But if it never comes, then I'll have to move on. I'm also hesitant because I'm afraid I won't find anyone else. But I know that will come with more time and friends.
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