Sunkissedpatio Posted August 8, 2016 Posted August 8, 2016 Good luck with that. Things like weight gain and " smothering" are apt to rock the boat when a guy simply did't fall hard enough for you! I tend to agree with this wholeheartedly. People don't just fall out of love, I believe they were never in love to begin with. A woman should get a hold on her weight for her own reasons, and I tend to agree with the poster who said it is probably more about the outward behaviour a woman manifests from her insecurities about looking less attractive than it is about the actual weight gain.
Author joyyu22 Posted August 8, 2016 Author Posted August 8, 2016 Haha. Ok. This is what women have to do when they are with a man who isn't head over heels for them. Good luck with that. Things like weight gain and " smothering" are apt to rock the boat when a guy simply did't fall hard enough for you! Meanwhile, me and my female friend are with men who are crazy about us even if we gained weight! Gosh it is better when you date men who are enamoured with you. No need to " go out with the girls, keep busy, appear like you are so awesoke and chill and casual and have a full lofe" With the right guy.... when a guy is into you enough, you do not have to do those things! My friend gained 25 lbs and her bf was still wanting to rip her clothes off as much as day one! Toodaloo isn't completely wrong when she tells me to have my own life. I get where's shes going. I've cancelled on my friends just so I can sit at home with him doing nothing but watching TV. I shouldn't have, not only did that make me a ****ty friend, I made his life my priority when my own should have been mine. You can have a man completely in love with you and still go out and do your own thing. 1
Sunkissedpatio Posted August 8, 2016 Posted August 8, 2016 Keeping a balance in your life with your mate is important. Having to do all those things as an after-thought to play a cat and mouse game is just bullsht. When you are compatible with someone who truly loves you and you are well matched you don't need to put that much effort into having to play at having a super busy life for fear that the man will lose interest in you. It happens organically. You both do your thing and you both spend all the time you want together because that is what makes you both happy. You can have a man completely in love with you and still go out and do your own thing. Of course!
Leigh 87 Posted August 9, 2016 Posted August 9, 2016 I am not advocating excessive weight gain or quitting your hobbies and "friends" in order to be super smothering and annoying.... But in general, in the best relationships I know of, the guy wkn't NEED to girl to have to go out of her way to "act/ carefree, chill and like " she is busy with her friends":sick: In great relationships, people just be themselves. I don't have " the girls" to go have " a girls night" with. I am not a nigel no friends either, but you can bet that I loose weight and maintain myself FOR ME, because I enjoy being attractive. And I talk to people in my degree and am amiable and social when I happen to be out of the house, but I rarely go see my friends or have " girls days":sick: in fact, I am not a girls girl and that SO isnt me. I am not miss popular, miss social butterfly. Being slim shouldn't be a requisite in order for your partner to be head over heels attracted to you. People age and get ugly. If you WERE head over heels to begin with then you should remain in love and passionate to some degee, save for genuinly reducing rates of hormones. Being an akward dork without " girls nights" or being sooo cool and chill and socially " popular" will have the right man fall hard for you. There is just no need to have to go and TRY to " live a full life" outside your partner. Chances are, it should happen naturally or else it is forced. Many couples mostly prefer to hang with each other. There is no need for them to make any conscious efforts to appear cool casual and chill. 1
Eighty_nine Posted August 9, 2016 Posted August 9, 2016 the responses about how OP just needs to lose the weight and this guys feelings are justified, etc., over 20 lbs is ridiculous. Also I'm always confused about why people assume 20 will become 40, 60, etc... that's simply not true. All I know is that someone I was in love with could gain or lose 20lbs and it would have absolutely no, check it out, zero affect on my feelings of attraction for them. Have some of you never been in love?? I guarantee you wouldn't just stop being attracted to a gf you were in love with over 20 pounds, that's just ridiculous. 50, 70 is different maybe. But I don't really think it's about the weight for OPs bf.
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