Is it acceptable for her to keep disappearing for weeks?

[alpo]

I have been involved with this woman for about 6 months and seeing/in a relationship with her officially for about 3 months. She has depression and anxiety which (she says) causes her to 'drop off the face of the earth' for weeks at a time, in which time she does not contact or talk to anyone except her children who she lives with, and only reluctantly accepts contact from a couple of family members who are worried about her if she doesn't answer the phone. She also looks depressed and very stressed most of the time.

 

When she is in a normal mood i never stop hearing from her. She phones me 3-4 times a day, talks for hours, etc. The other week she invited me out with her kids and my kids like a proper family day out. That went well and i assumed she was back to normal. She carried on regular contact and enthusiasm for like a week afterwards and now she's disappeared again. No contact.

 

I just cannot help thinking that during these disappearances she is hooked up with someone else. I even called her out on it before and asked her if she's seeing someone because I needed to know so i could move on and put her behind me. She denied it and went funny about it. Her last relationship was with a very controlling guy who monitored her every move and wouldn't even let her see friends and she seemed to be implying that me asking if she's seeing someone was going along those same lines of being 'controlling'. It wasn't. I have plenty of offers and if she was seeing someone I just wanted to know so i could delete her and move on.

 

There is something about this one i really like, and she keeps saying the chemistry we have and the mental connection we have is like nothing she's ever experienced. She's introduced me to close friends and some of her family which she said she reserves for people who are special to her. My kids have met her kids, etc. We have got really close.

 

It's just these random weeks of no contact and disappearing that is bothering me very much. She seems to think there is no problem with it. Like it's no big deal to be so close to someone and then ignore them completely for weeks. Not even a single text, nothing. Just says 'My head went on me and i had to cut off and lock myself in my house not speak to anyone'.

 

Of course everyone needs their own time and space. i don't need to be with her every moment of every day (it's one of many things we have in common, the need for own space) but constant communication and closeness one minute and then absolutely nothing for weeks is too much.

 

Would you find this acceptable or no?

[LookAtThisPOst]

I have been involved with this woman for about 6 months and seeing/in a relationship with her officially for about 3 months. She has depression and anxiety which (she says) causes her to 'drop off the face of the earth' for weeks at a time, in which time she does not contact or talk to anyone except her children who she lives with, and only reluctantly accepts contact from a couple of family members who are worried about her if she doesn't answer the phone. She also looks depressed and very stressed most of the time.

 

When she is in a normal mood i never stop hearing from her. She phones me 3-4 times a day, talks for hours, etc. The other week she invited me out with her kids and my kids like a proper family day out. That went well and i assumed she was back to normal. She carried on regular contact and enthusiasm for like a week afterwards and now she's disappeared again. No contact.

 

I just cannot help thinking that during these disappearances she is hooked up with someone else. I even called her out on it before and asked her if she's seeing someone because I needed to know so i could move on and put her behind me. She denied it and went funny about it. Her last relationship was with a very controlling guy who monitored her every move and wouldn't even let her see friends and she seemed to be implying that me asking if she's seeing someone was going along those same lines of being 'controlling'. It wasn't. I have plenty of offers and if she was seeing someone I just wanted to know so i could delete her and move on.

 

There is something about this one i really like, and she keeps saying the chemistry we have and the mental connection we have is like nothing she's ever experienced. She's introduced me to close friends and some of her family which she said she reserves for people who are special to her. My kids have met her kids, etc. We have got really close.

 

It's just these random weeks of no contact and disappearing that is bothering me very much. She seems to think there is no problem with it. Like it's no big deal to be so close to someone and then ignore them completely for weeks. Not even a single text, nothing. Just says 'My head went on me and i had to cut off and lock myself in my house not speak to anyone'.

 

Of course everyone needs their own time and space. i don't need to be with her every moment of every day (it's one of many things we have in common, the need for own space) but constant communication and closeness one minute and then absolutely nothing for weeks is too much.

 

Would you find this acceptable or no?

 

Why did you get involved with her to begin with, no offense, but I would have moved on if I found out she was like this.

 

There is something about this one i really like, and she keeps saying the chemistry we have and the mental connection we have is like nothing she's ever experienced

 

This is why I dismiss the whole "Chemistry is a must!" statement mentioned in tons of profiles. Chemistry is overrated and (and this is not meant to be insensitive) the OP's outcome is the result.

[Satu]

'Acceptable' is defined by what you're willing to accept.

 

It sounds like you find her behaviour unacceptable.

 

Thats the only opinion you really need.

 

 

Take care.

[alpo]

Why did you get involved with her to begin with, no offense, but I would have moved on if I found out she was like this.

 

Well I only found out she was like this once I got to know her better. We were kinda just friends at the beginning I guess but she was the one who constantly pushed for more. Even though I liked her everything was moved forward and initiated by her. I wasn't in any rush. It was her that moved the pace along and demonstrated CLEARLY that she wanted more. I agreed because i was into her by then as much as she was into me.

 

This is what I don't get about her. She says all this stuff about how much she likes me and how she hopes she hasn't offended me or upset me in any way and all this stuff. She is always trying to placate me. Yet she seems to think there is no issue with weeks of no contact. I am not looking for a hook up/sex buddy I have had plenty of those lol, I am looking for a long term thing, as she knows. She says we are a perfect match but drops off the earth for weeks without so much as a single text.

[Redhead14]

I have been involved with this woman for about 6 months and seeing/in a relationship with her officially for about 3 months. She has depression and anxiety which (she says) causes her to 'drop off the face of the earth' for weeks at a time, in which time she does not contact or talk to anyone except her children who she lives with, and only reluctantly accepts contact from a couple of family members who are worried about her if she doesn't answer the phone. She also looks depressed and very stressed most of the time.

 

When she is in a normal mood i never stop hearing from her. She phones me 3-4 times a day, talks for hours, etc. The other week she invited me out with her kids and my kids like a proper family day out. That went well and i assumed she was back to normal. She carried on regular contact and enthusiasm for like a week afterwards and now she's disappeared again. No contact.

 

I just cannot help thinking that during these disappearances she is hooked up with someone else. I even called her out on it before and asked her if she's seeing someone because I needed to know so i could move on and put her behind me. She denied it and went funny about it. Her last relationship was with a very controlling guy who monitored her every move and wouldn't even let her see friends and she seemed to be implying that me asking if she's seeing someone was going along those same lines of being 'controlling'. It wasn't. I have plenty of offers and if she was seeing someone I just wanted to know so i could delete her and move on.

 

There is something about this one i really like, and she keeps saying the chemistry we have and the mental connection we have is like nothing she's ever experienced. She's introduced me to close friends and some of her family which she said she reserves for people who are special to her. My kids have met her kids, etc. We have got really close.

 

It's just these random weeks of no contact and disappearing that is bothering me very much. She seems to think there is no problem with it. Like it's no big deal to be so close to someone and then ignore them completely for weeks. Not even a single text, nothing. Just says 'My head went on me and i had to cut off and lock myself in my house not speak to anyone'.

 

Of course everyone needs their own time and space. i don't need to be with her every moment of every day (it's one of many things we have in common, the need for own space) but constant communication and closeness one minute and then absolutely nothing for weeks is too much.

 

Would you find this acceptable or no?

 

She denied it and went funny about it. Her last relationship was with a very controlling guy who monitored her every move -- Likely because she would disappear for weeks at a time and so he was thinking what you think "I just cannot help thinking that during these disappearances she is hooked up with someone else."

 

People who pull away for extended periods of time, will have a very difficult time developing a healthy relationship for that reason. They cannot maintain the connection.

 

and she keeps saying the chemistry we have and the mental connection -- It is very unlikely that there is that kind of connection, otherwise, she could not do what she does. Pushing people away is a sign of disconnectedness. They aren't bonded well enough to people/the world. How can they be connected if they can shut it out for period of time? Sure, when she's "up", she thinks there's a connection, but trust me, she isn't being totally open and transparent and connected. People like this can put on a very good face for the outside world, but their inside world is dark, tumultuous and full of anxiety and fear.

 

I would back off of this one, you will be setting yourself for long-term anxiety and insecurity and damaged esteem.

[LookAtThisPOst]

Well I only found out she was like this once I got to know her better. We were kinda just friends at the beginning I guess but she was the one who constantly pushed for more. Even though I liked her everything was moved forward and initiated by her. I wasn't in any rush. It was her that moved the pace along and demonstrated CLEARLY that she wanted more. I agreed because i was into her by then as much as she was into me.

 

This is what I don't get about her. She says all this stuff about how much she likes me and how she hopes she hasn't offended me or upset me in any way and all this stuff. She is always trying to placate me. Yet she seems to think there is no issue with weeks of no contact. I am not looking for a hook up/sex buddy I have had plenty of those lol, I am looking for a long term thing, as she knows. She says we are a perfect match but drops off the earth for weeks without so much as a single text.

 

I would send her a message (only because she refuses to communicate, which his a major deal breaker anyhow...probably for anyone who wants to keep their lives healthy, and say to her that "We should take a break" and to "get back to you when you're ready so we can revisit the nature of the relationship."

 

Basically, this puts you in the green light mode to pursue other dating opportunities as you're under no obligation after sending that message to be monogamous anymore.

 

But don't go jumping into anything NEW right away, but this may light a fire under her butt to motivate her to respond, if not, then well...you're now free of her so that she can deal her issues.

[longjohn]

I'd say a flat out absolute 100% positively NO. Move along there's way too many red flags here. Plenty of ladies out there willing to no screw around like this.

[bachdude]

Whether or not she is telling the truth regarding why she disappears is irrelevant in my book. I wouldn't be able to handle that. That is a ridiculously long time to go NC. If she can summons the strength to stay in minimal contract with family during those times she could do the same with you.

[clia]

No, I would not find it acceptable to date someone who disappeared without a word for weeks at a time. Why would anyone accept that sort of behavior?

[Zahara]

I would not accept being in a relationship with someone that disappears for weeks at a time. That to me would be a sign of emotional unavailability and the inability to genuinely connect.

 

There is something about this one i really like, and she keeps saying the chemistry we have and the mental connection we have is like nothing she's ever experienced

 

That's why she can go weeks without it. Sounds like a bunch of words to keep you where you are. Actions, not words.

[alpo]

She denied it and went funny about it. Her last relationship was with a very controlling guy who monitored her every move -- Likely because she would disappear for weeks at a time and so he was thinking what you think "I just cannot help thinking that during these disappearances she is hooked up with someone else."

 

People who pull away for extended periods of time, will have a very difficult time developing a healthy relationship for that reason. They cannot maintain the connection.

 

and she keeps saying the chemistry we have and the mental connection -- It is very unlikely that there is that kind of connection, otherwise, she could not do what she does. Pushing people away is a sign of disconnectedness. They aren't bonded well enough to people/the world. How can they be connected if they can shut it out for period of time? Sure, when she's "up", she thinks there's a connection, but trust me, she isn't being totally open and transparent and connected. People like this can put on a very good face for the outside world, but their inside world is dark, tumultuous and full of anxiety and fear.

 

I would back off of this one, you will be setting yourself for long-term anxiety and insecurity and damaged esteem.

 

Yes that's exactly what i've thought too about the other guy. She keeps repeatedly saying he was too controlling, she had to hide her friends from him, he wouldn't let her have her male friends, etc. All the time i'm thinking if she disappeared on him like that then no wonder the guy was constantly paranoid and wondering where she is.

[alpo]

If I call her during one of these disappearances she does answer but sounds moody and depressed and like she doesn't want to talk so i just cut the call short and leave her to get on with it. She doesn't answer texts though.

 

Thing is she always seems to be trying to placate me and not wanting me to get upset or annoyed about anything. If I be more blunt or moody or aggressive sounding on texts she'll phone instantly to check she hasn't upset me etc. The tone of her voice, the things she says etc is so convincing to sound like she truly cares for me. You guys think she could be putting all that on just to keep me around/hanging on?

[smackie9]

Hot cold people are afraid of getting hurt. When things get good, the insecurities kick in and they push away and hide. I have done some reading about this, and without therapy they won't stop. It's a form of anxiety and it's long term learned behavior. They need their space to shake it off. Most of the articles I have read flat out recommend, you are better to just walk away.

[alpo]

I would send her a message (only because she refuses to communicate, which his a major deal breaker anyhow...probably for anyone who wants to keep their lives healthy, and say to her that "We should take a break" and to "get back to you when you're ready so we can revisit the nature of the relationship."

 

Basically, this puts you in the green light mode to pursue other dating opportunities as you're under no obligation after sending that message to be monogamous anymore.

 

But don't go jumping into anything NEW right away, but this may light a fire under her butt to motivate her to respond, if not, then well...you're now free of her so that she can deal her issues.

 

Yes this is exactly what I've been considering for a while now. When she disappears I don't chase her down after she ignores one text I just leave her be but then sure enough about 2 weeks later she's initiating contact again constantly, every single day she'll phone me all day long. It's so full on when she's into it, which leads me to forget about sending that message you have suggested. Basically anytime I've tried to forget her and consider one of my other options she's back again like a normal relationship.

[Redhead14]

Yes that's exactly what i've thought too about the other guy. She keeps repeatedly saying he was too controlling, she had to hide her friends from him, he wouldn't let her have her male friends, etc. All the time i'm thinking if she disappeared on him like that then no wonder the guy was constantly paranoid and wondering where she is.

 

This happens often. The person who pulls away starts feeling as though the other person is trying to control them, when in fact, they themselves have caused their partner to become insecure.

 

How old is she? What is her dating history before you and this other man? How long does she says she's struggled with depression, etc.? What is her family history?

 

The other thing that happens too,sometimes, is that the person who is struggling/damaged, will enter into abusive relationships time and again which further feeds their "problems". If they find someone who isn't abusive or controlling, the simply fall into the trap of creating a similar environment on a subconscious level, in order to have a reason to "back off" a possibly good partner simply out of fear of exploring that opportunity.

 

Bottom line, there's just not good relationship potential here. She needs to do some work on herself.

 

If she is cheating, it's just because she's chasing and trying to fill a hole that cannot be filled from an outside source. She'll just keep up a cycle of sabotaging because she's become comfortable with the distraction so as not to focus inward until she can't maintain her facade any longer, then she retreats into a negative thinking/self-abusing (isolation) position again. Rinse and repeat.

 

Regardless of whether this is the case for her or not, she's just plain not a good match for you, that's for sure.

[I Just Wanna b Happy]

When she's disappearing for weeks at a time she reappearing in another man's bed. I'm sure you already know this. Let her go.

[alpo]

This happens often. The person who pulls away starts feeling as though the other person is trying to control them, when in fact, they themselves have caused their partner to become insecure.

 

How old is she? What is her dating history before you and this other man? How long does she says she's struggled with depression, etc.? What is her family history?

 

The other thing that happens too,sometimes, is that the person who is struggling/damaged, will enter into abusive relationships time and again which further feeds their "problems". If they find someone who isn't abusive or controlling, the simply fall into the trap of creating a similar environment on a subconscious level, in order to have a reason to "back off" a possibly good partner simply out of fear of exploring that opportunity.

 

Bottom line, there's just not good relationship potential here. She needs to do some work on herself.

 

If she is cheating, it's just because she's chasing and trying to fill a hole that cannot be filled from an outside source. She'll just keep up a cycle of sabotaging because she's become comfortable with the distraction so as not to focus inward until she can't maintain her facade any longer, then she retreats into a negative thinking/self-abusing (isolation) position again. Rinse and repeat.

 

Regardless of whether this is the case for her or not, she's just plain not a good match for you, that's for sure.

 

She's 32. Her dating history is full of short term relationships as far as I know (6 months etc) filled in with hook ups. The only LTR I know of is the one she had with her kids dad which was over 9 years.

 

She has been diagnosed with the depression and anxiety for about 6 months too but says her head has been gone for over a year. What do you mean by her family history?

 

When she is out in public she seems a nervous wreck particularly around random men, men she comes into contact with. She has had lots of male partners but seems to be terrified/paranoid of men in general, although she appears to be more than comfortable around me.

 

The fact she is this way around random guys is the part of me that doesn't think she is seeing someone else. She doesn't seem to be the outwardly flirty type. She doesn't seem to 'put it out there' like that. Sure she has a group of seemingly close male friends, but these are guys she's known for over 10 years and any relationship with potential with them i would think is dead in the water? if it even was there, otherwise she would have gone there already.

 

I just can't get over the fact that she could have been lying or insincere with all the stuff she's told me about chemistry and mental connections and all that. I consider myself a very good judge of character and i wouldn't have ever guessed she was a deceitful person.

 

She said that other boyfriends have told her she is cold and stone hearted because she is not into 'soppy' things (another thing we are both similar on) like telling them she loves them every few days, holding hands, etc, yet with me she seemed more gushing and servile to me. I've even joked with her about it on text telling her to stop acting scared of me, stop letting me melt her heart, and be more aggressive like she was when we met, which she laughed about.

 

It's like one minute she's almost fawning over me and hoping I never go from her life, doing anything to please me etc and then the next, just nothing at all, like I am of zero importance to her.

[Redhead14]

She's 32. Her dating history is full of short term relationships as far as I know (6 months etc) filled in with hook ups. The only LTR I know of is the one she had with her kids dad which was over 9 years.

 

She has been diagnosed with the depression and anxiety for about 6 months too but says her head has been gone for over a year. What do you mean by her family history?

 

When she is out in public she seems a nervous wreck particularly around random men, men she comes into contact with. She has had lots of male partners but seems to be terrified/paranoid of men in general, although she appears to be more than comfortable around me.

 

The fact she is this way around random guys is the part of me that doesn't think she is seeing someone else. She doesn't seem to be the outwardly flirty type. She doesn't seem to 'put it out there' like that. Sure she has a group of seemingly close male friends, but these are guys she's known for over 10 years and any relationship with potential with them i would think is dead in the water? if it even was there, otherwise she would have gone there already.

 

I just can't get over the fact that she could have been lying or insincere with all the stuff she's told me about chemistry and mental connections and all that. I consider myself a very good judge of character and i wouldn't have ever guessed she was a deceitful person.

 

She said that other boyfriends have told her she is cold and stone hearted because she is not into 'soppy' things (another thing we are both similar on) like telling them she loves them every few days, holding hands, etc, yet with me she seemed more gushing and servile to me. I've even joked with her about it on text telling her to stop acting scared of me, stop letting me melt her heart, and be more aggressive like she was when we met, which she laughed about.

 

It's like one minute she's almost fawning over me and hoping I never go from her life, doing anything to please me etc and then the next, just nothing at all, like I am of zero importance to her.

 

Oh, she's been "this way" for quite sometime. She may have been diagnosed recently, but it's been there for a long time.

 

Hot/cold behavior is the sign of inner turmoil, indecisiveness, insecurity. Her history is very typical in a case like hers.

 

She has had lots of male partners but seems to be terrified/paranoid of men in general -- She may not trust men, but she does want validation from them and her fear/paranoia stems from worrying that they won't give her that validation. It's both fear and thrill.

 

I consider myself a very good judge of character and i wouldn't have ever guessed she was a deceitful person. -- She's probably not being intentionally deceitful, she's lying to herself more than anything else.

 

By family history I mean -- does she come from a chaotic home life? Suffered any abuse from family members or a home where one parent abandoned the family, or alcoholic, etc? Her "symptoms" imply a history of some kind of abuse early in her life. At 32, she should be more together than she sounds. Since she isn't, the foundation laid for her was very weak.

 

Run, don't walk.

[leogirl876]

Even let's say she does have depression, it sounds like bipolar disorder. Someone who has bipolar, even when they're on meds still have erratic moods. My ex-bf was bipolar, and trust me, you don't wanna go through that. They don't get better, even with medication. This wouldn't be acceptable to me. I think you should move on. How can you build a healthy relationship? And she keeps saying you two have chemistry and a good relationship. What do you think? Do you think this is healthy? My guess is no, otherwise you wouldn't be asking us what we think.

[alpo]

 

By family history I mean -- does she come from a chaotic home life? Suffered any abuse from family members or a home where one parent abandoned the family, or alcoholic, etc? Her "symptoms" imply a history of some kind of abuse early in her life. At 32, she should be more together than she sounds. Since she isn't, the foundation laid for her was very weak.

.

 

Oh, okay. I wouldn't say chaotic, but she says when she's been to therapy, they have nudged her to bring up her childhood and she recalls from her childhood where her mother went out on weekends and she would be left to care for all her other siblings without any support. She was like 15 or 16 and would be caring for multiple siblings all by herself and having to sort everything out for them, provide food, heat for them etc while her mother was out partying with boyfriend/husband. Also had a step dad who ruled with an iron fist. But not physically abused or alcohol abuse as far as I know. She's told me loads about her upbringing and childhood but nothing appeared out of the ordinary to me. But then again I also come from a similar sort of background (single parent, aggressive dad, not much money etc) to her so I guess I didn't think much into that side of it.

 

What she's been through in more recent times seemed more alarming to me like she admitted she tried suicide quite recently before we were seeing each other, and then contemplated giving the kids up to social care because she wasn't coping. She was drinking a lot and lost her home.

 

We've talked for hours about this stuff but she's always given me the impression that me being around is perfectly fine and that I'm not an inconvenience while she deals with this stuff. I've told her many times that if she isn't ina position for a relationship I don't mind and we can either cut ties and move on, just be friends, or whatever, but each time she continues to say about how much she likes me, how she loves my company and her actions convey about as much at the time - phoning me all the time, inviting me out with her and her kids, spending time with me, and then all of a sudden, bang, she's gone again and it's nothing for 2-3 weeks.

[Redhead14]

Oh, okay. I wouldn't say chaotic, but she says when she's been to therapy, they have nudged her to bring up her childhood and she recalls from her childhood where her mother went out on weekends and she would be left to care for all her other siblings without any support. She was like 15 or 16 and would be caring for multiple siblings all by herself and having to sort everything out for them, provide food, heat for them etc while her mother was out partying with boyfriend/husband. Also had a step dad who ruled with an iron fist. But not physically abused or alcohol abuse as far as I know. She's told me loads about her upbringing and childhood but nothing appeared out of the ordinary to me. But then again I also come from a similar sort of background (single parent, aggressive dad, not much money etc) to her so I guess I didn't think much into that side of it.

 

What she's been through in more recent times seemed more alarming to me like she admitted she tried suicide quite recently before we were seeing each other, and then contemplated giving the kids up to social care because she wasn't coping. She was drinking a lot and lost her home.

 

We've talked for hours about this stuff but she's always given me the impression that me being around is perfectly fine and that I'm not an inconvenience while she deals with this stuff. I've told her many times that if she isn't ina position for a relationship I don't mind and we can either cut ties and move on, just be friends, or whatever, but each time she continues to say about how much she likes me, how she loves my company and her actions convey about as much at the time - phoning me all the time, inviting me out with her and her kids, spending time with me, and then all of a sudden, bang, she's gone again and it's nothing for 2-3 weeks.

We've talked for hours about this stuff but she's always given me the impression that me being around is perfectly fine and that I'm not an inconvenience while she deals with this stuff. -- And, yet, she cuts you off . . . She cannot maintain a meaningful relationship and won't be for a long time. I hope she sticks with therapy, it does help and it's a process, not an event. There will not be some kind of epiphany-type awakening, it will be a slow process of growth and self-awareness.

 

Her family life has set her and any other partners up for disappointment and heartache. She was basically abandoned and left to fend for herself at a young age. At that age, if there is no support system, they have to turn inward in order to deal with and figure things out for themselves and that is survival mode.

 

I wouldn't say chaotic -- For a 15 year old, that environment is nothing but chaotic, stressful and damaging on a whole bunch of levels. Being forced to deal with adult issues while still being a kid is a confusing, scary, hectic and filled with uncertainty, self-doubt, guilt and fear.

 

And, you could simply tell her that you can't tolerate her pulling away for weeks at a time -- but her response would likely be something along the lines that you are trying to control her . . .

Edited August 3, 2016 by Redhead14

[bachdude]

It's completely your decision OP, but from what you describe my opinion is a long term relationship with your GF with be difficult and draining. It would be for me anyway.

[katiegrl]

 

and she keeps saying the chemistry we have and the mental connection -- It is very unlikely that there is that kind of connection, otherwise, she could not do what she does. Pushing people away is a sign of disconnectedness.

 

They aren't bonded well enough to people/the world. How can they be connected if they can shut it out for period of time? Sure, when she's "up", she thinks there's a connection, but trust me, she isn't being totally open and transparent and connected. People like this can put on a very good face for the outside world, but their inside world is dark, tumultuous and full of anxiety and fear.

 

 

Bolded -- or they aren't bonded enough to the person they are pulling away from.

[Redhead14]

Bolded -- or they aren't bonded enough to the person they are pulling away from.

 

Of course . . .

[katiegrl]

 

It's just these random weeks of no contact and disappearing that is bothering me very much. She seems to think there is no problem with it. Like it's no big deal to be so close to someone and then ignore them completely for weeks. Not even a single text, nothing.

 

Just says 'My head went on me and i had to cut off and lock myself in my house not speak to anyone'.

 

 

Well if she cuts herself off from everyone, perhaps she suffers from some sort of mood disorder because that's not normal.

 

Has she been evaluated by a doctor for this? If not, you might want to encourage her to... as again this behavior is not normal.

 

It might have nothing to do with you personally.