Flamez Posted August 1, 2016 Posted August 1, 2016 Just looking for someone who is experienced with this. As i see homebrew gibson and them arent on here anymore.
Author Flamez Posted August 1, 2016 Author Posted August 1, 2016 Need more information. You seem to have been here awhile, im assuming youre experienced with this subject?
basil67 Posted August 1, 2016 Posted August 1, 2016 You seem to have been here awhile, im assuming youre experienced with this subject? You haven't given enough info for me to comment yet
basil67 Posted August 1, 2016 Posted August 1, 2016 I went back over your previous posts for context. I should start by saying that I don't believe in GIGS. I think it's just a way of trying to persuade ourselves that an ex was wrong for leaving. It's been 8 months. And unless you've got more to tell us, I'm guessing that she's well and truly moved on. If she's still the trainwreck you've described, count your blessings that you're out of there.
ExpatInItaly Posted August 1, 2016 Posted August 1, 2016 I went back over your previous posts for context. I should start by saying that I don't believe in GIGS. I think it's just a way of trying to persuade ourselves that an ex was wrong for leaving. It's been 8 months. And unless you've got more to tell us, I'm guessing that she's well and truly moved on. If she's still the trainwreck you've described, count your blessings that you're out of there. Bingo. OP, you need to provide more information about your situation if you want feedback.
Author Flamez Posted August 1, 2016 Author Posted August 1, 2016 (edited) Oh no shes still a trainwreck. Even worse/ maybe the same. I havent talked to her for 2 months going on 3. She sent me a happy birthday text 2 weeks ago at 12:15 though which i ignored. First text i ever ignored from her. I got tired of her mixed signals. Hot/cold behavior. I dont believe shes moved on. I believe shes to numb to feel/process anything. Been missing her recently. Back at 2 going on 3 months NC. Im about 90% id say i cant tell really, i just know i feel alot better than i did those first months. Not fully there yet. I dont think ill ever stop loving her, just learning to live without her is the task. She was my first serious g/f since i was 16 now im 23. She reached out to be friends at the 4 month mark. Broke NC. Well she ended up breaking vertebrates in a OVI accident. Totaled car etc. After that I tried to be friends, we hung out a couple times. She started crying one time, other times she was smiling nonstop etc. During those first months of contact ( 2 months ago ) she was saying she misses me, yada yada yada. Misses what we had. That she treated me like ****. That she sees me in the future. She still has time to be 'crazy'. She loves me ' but not like that RIGHT NOW ' That she feels we will always have a connection forever. Part of her doesnt want me to move on. We kissed one of those times. She said shes not ready to get intimate with me YET. From what i know shes gone through relationships that have failed. Shes addicted to alcohol, and benzos now that i know of. Shed be really hot on me for awhile then dissapears which she did, why we haven't talked and why im ignoring her now. It was breadcrumb city those 3 months straight. Reason why i didnt want to really post unless people have gone through it. Im not asking if you believe it or not. This is not the average oh im gonna call it a gigs because i cant come to reality were over. I came to that conclusion already. Im going off homebrews and smokeybears threads which have not been off. So thats what im calling it. From the slutty clothing she now wears. Change of circle of friends all the time. The everyday all day party scene. Not a day off. 8 months straight. The legal trouble, self destructive behavior. The see you in future talk. Short lived relationships. Reaching out for friends. The i still want you / i dont know what i want talk. Reasons for breaking up with me unknown/change monthly. Not really a question. Just been missing her. I improved alot. Now going to school for electrical. Gained 30lbs of muscle. Haircut etc. Just been working, working out. Thats about it. It does get easier but idk one of them weeks. Im assuming shes gonna reach out again soon. Me not responding probably through her for a tailspin. Edited August 1, 2016 by Flamez
ExpatInItaly Posted August 1, 2016 Posted August 1, 2016 How old is she, OP? It sounds to me like she wanted to be young and free (normal, at your age; I assume she is around your age, too) - and went completely off the rails. Also, how do you know that she's partying all the time, having short relationships, and so on? I ask because you badly need to cut off your source of information on her. Knowing all of these details is keeping you stuck. Good for you for making positive changes in your life. She is heading in a bad direction and you don't want to be dragged into that. It's not worth it. She might have been your first real love, but she won't be your last.
Author Flamez Posted August 1, 2016 Author Posted August 1, 2016 (edited) How old is she, OP? It sounds to me like she wanted to be young and free (normal, at your age; I assume she is around your age, too) - and went completely off the rails. Also, how do you know that she's partying all the time, having short relationships, and so on? I ask because you badly need to cut off your source of information on her. Knowing all of these details is keeping you stuck. Good for you for making positive changes in your life. She is heading in a bad direction and you don't want to be dragged into that. It's not worth it. She might have been your first real love, but she won't be your last. 21 gonna be 22 in november. All information came from her. Shes a bartender. She drinks on the job. When shes not working shes attending the bars on campus. ( she doesnt go to school ) theres just 5 bars on one street with alot of people. I dont believe any of that is whats keeping me stuck. I dont believen anything is keeping me stuck aside my own mind. Her having sex with guys is cake in my mind now. I can see her facebook whenever i want and i havent since our first month of our breakup.. i dont because i know i wont like what i see. I dont think anything is holding me back personally. Ive been super close to burning everything that ties our past together and blocking her all together on everything. I couldnt do that or was even thinking of that until recently. Im letting go and im almost completely there. Just this next hurdle. Edited August 1, 2016 by Flamez
Daking123 Posted August 1, 2016 Posted August 1, 2016 How old is she, OP? It sounds to me like she wanted to be young and free (normal, at your age; I assume she is around your age, too) - and went completely off the rails. Also, how do you know that she's partying all the time, having short relationships, and so on? I ask because you badly need to cut off your source of information on her. Knowing all of these details is keeping you stuck. Good for you for making positive changes in your life. She is heading in a bad direction and you don't want to be dragged into that. It's not worth it. She might have been your first real love, but she won't be your last. Sounds like my ex she left me 7 months ago. Went NC on the 2 month mark she reached out saying "I honestly thought you was my soulmate, my other rin, but right isn't a good time, if the time is right we will be back". Then I went NC she calls ask to hang out i agreed. The vibe was off I could sense she wasn't in the right mind. I could look at her and tell to up and down. Went hardcore NC for 3 months she would text I would ignore her, she would make fake profiles, I'd ignore her, she would reach out to my best friend I told them to ignore her. Wasn't til my birthday I broke NC. She messaged a friend I was hanging with and told him "to get me to contact her" I told him to ignore it. So she said put us in a group chat so we did, she told me Happy Birthday. Then she left the group just to talk to me individual. She was saying how proud she was of me, how happy she was for me etc. This where things get strange. Two days after she said that she texted me out of anger ( five stages of grief ) that's what I believe is apart of GIGS. Like she was telling me how she cheated on me so many times, how she was blocking all my friends on everything ( she never did, and my friends never intitated contact with her ) etc. This was the first time I've known her to do this put i belive its part of GIGS so hold tight
aloneinaz Posted August 1, 2016 Posted August 1, 2016 You're both very young and that relationship ran its course. You both need to have more relationship experience before settling down for a long term commitment or marriage w/someone new. It's hard to really let go of a first serious relationship but the vast majority of people on this planet do exactly that. They realize it was young love and nothing more. If/when you meet someone new who rocks your world, the time you spend thinking about this ex will diminish rapidly to the point where you no longer think of her. So, go out, date, have fun and enjoy your youth. Before you know it, you'll be middle age and wondering where your youth went. 1
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