mikerusso1451 Posted July 31, 2016 Posted July 31, 2016 First let me say that I'm new here I just recently stumbled onto this site and register after seeing a few good post on here. Moving foward My ex contacted me after almost 2 months of NC. I’ll try to make it short. My ex gf broke it off because she wasn’t happy, I would cancel dates on her a lot, not because I wasn’t interested in her, but because I have a demanding job. When we were together everything was pretty good. Anyway, at some point she had enough of me studding her up and things got ugly and took a turn for the worse, and then the break up came. She told me it was over. I told her I was making changes in my schedule to make it work that I love her and that didn’t want to lose what we had, but it didn’t work. She told me she didn’t want to talk to me. So, I left her alone after texting her a few times with her responding that it was over and to leave her alone. 2 weeks later she text me to wish me happy birthday at midnight. I replied thank you and the no contact continued between us for another 2 weeks, until she text me again. She text me a picture I framed for her of us and it was shattered, she deliberately broke the image. I didn’t respond to the message because I thought it wasn’t a nice way to reach out and didn’t know what to make of it. She finally reached out to me 2 weeks later and said she just wanted to know how I was doing. This time I responded by saying I was fine and I asked how she was and she said she said same old that she’s been working. Then I text her the following day to say hi. I noticed that I was the only one initiating contact, with her being responsive, but very short. The other day I intitiated if we could meet up for dinner so we could sit down and talk, she agreed. A few days later I text her that I miss her, she replied with “I miss our friendship” I haven’t responded with “I wish I could say that same” and she replied that she can’t go back to that. We’re scheduled to meet up soon for dinner. I feel somewhat awkward now. I’m still in love with her and the NC has help me improve myself, but I do miss her and feel she’s the one for me. Also I don’t know what to make of this, but she snapped a image of her on a bike she obviously was riding with someone on the bike, her ex has a bike maybe I’m overanylyzing, but maybe she’s working things out with him? She told me they were just friends in the past. Am I setting myself up for heartache and disaster? Should I still meet with her for dinner? Any advice is appreciated. Thank you for reading.
heartfeltlove Posted July 31, 2016 Posted July 31, 2016 I keep reading about No Contact on here, and I saw it in someone's signature as a link. This is the No Contact advice. It seems everyone here swears by it. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/470829-all-new-2014-no-contact-guide I would suggest you read it, because it sounds very much as if you are prolonging your own agony. She doesn't want to re-start your relationship, but she seems to want to hang onto you because you're a convenient person to have around as a friend. This is fine for her, but a disaster for you. 1
Author mikerusso1451 Posted July 31, 2016 Author Posted July 31, 2016 That's how I'm feeling. Is there anything besides no contact that will make this workout? Thanks for the advice.
SevenCity Posted July 31, 2016 Posted July 31, 2016 Time. That's it. And by work out I mean you will get over it. She is showing absolutely no signs of ever wanting you back.
LostOnes05 Posted July 31, 2016 Posted July 31, 2016 Dude, no contact is NO CONTACT. You haven't been in no contact. You'll never get over her if you keep letting her reach out and text/snap you crap to pull you back in. I learned this the hard way...if she wants out, she's out and let it be. But don't let them creep back in unless you've worked through things and are ready to work on the relationship. Otherwise, you're setting yourself up for the firing squad... 1
LD1990 Posted July 31, 2016 Posted July 31, 2016 I never understand how people say they've been in NC when they're still talking to their exes. Anyways, there's no secret formula to getting an ex back. Your ex either decides she wants to try again, or she doesn't. Considering she specifically said she misses your friendship, it doesn't sound like she wants anything romantic. It's best to go real NC and move on. 1
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