Do Opposites Really Attract????

[Ryan_XD]

We've all heard the famous saying "opposites attract" but do they?

 

From my personal experience - yes.

 

I'm currently in a relationship with a girl, we have been seeing each other for about 4 months and decided to make things more official this week.

 

Anyway, we are complete opposites And we get on amazing! Much better than any previous relationships in which I went with girls that I had more in common with.

 

It's been a huge eye opener as to not always stick with what you're comfortable with and that we don't really have a "type" we just stick with what we are used to and what we feel most comfortable with (in my opinion).

 

Interested to see what you guys think whether couples who are from complete opposite background or have completely different personalities or different tastes can actually work?

 

Or do you think people need to have some sort of common ground between each other?

[Bialy]

That's cool. How are you two opposites?

 

I think it's totally possible for opposites to attract. I think it shows a strong sense of individuality and strength as a couple. I do think there are SOME topics that are important to have common ground in: financial and long-term goals - these two can be at the root of so many arguments.

 

There are certain things I love to share with a partner - the outdoors, hiking, biking, etc. I love these activities so much and do them often enough that it's something I love to overlap with a special someone.

 

I've been total opposites with someone on what I like to read vs what he likes to read. Also, we've been opposites in terms of how we grew up and how we've approached life differently.

 

I'm not religious -- I don't think I'd be a good match for someone who was a regular church goer.

Edited July 31, 2016 by Bialy

[Gr8fuln2020]

I believe in complementing a partner, but I have yet to meet a couple that were opposites. On the surface, you may think they are opposites, but you find that they have more similarities and mutual interests than no.

 

I think it TOO dangerous to put too much merit on the whole opposites attract thing becoming a meaningful, long term relationship. It may be that the mysterious, unknown is exciting at first and lures some to someone who is outside of their norm, but long term relationships are often strained after the novelty wears off.

[Ami1uwant]

It depends on how you are opposite and what you do share that are common.

 

In some ways being opposite in some ways can be good in a relationship like your strengths are their week nessus and visa versa.

 

There are ares where differences can cause problems like different religion, wanting kids, operate on different work schedules, one is a night person and the other a morning person.

[scooby-philly]

I think you are seeing a consistent message here OP. I have yet to meet a couple thats completely opposite and id also advise someone from dating a mirrored copy of themselves. As several people said what do any of us mean when we say that line? The approach to things might be different but insee couples last that share the same core values even if they never realize they do.

 

My list is....sexual compatability.....intro vs extroverts.....financial planning and spending......need for friends vs need for intimacy.....religion......child raising..... thrill seekers vs stable makers...class and social status.... and work life balance...and intellect. Outside of those areas differences are fine. And they play to that loint of weaknesses and strenghts complimenting each other. But those non negotiable areas....need tonbe aligned for something to survive long term. One or two may be slightly different but thats about it. And obviously too strong of a difference in just kne area can cause a split...but it has to be a red hot buttoj for someone

[thecrucible]

I see what my worst flaw is - emotional avoidance. If I was with a guy and we were both like this, the relationship would just not work as communication would break down between us. If the guy balances out that flaw of mine, then that's a way in which 'opposites attract' works well for me.

 

I can't assume but instinct and experience tells me that I'm better being with a fellow introvert. In a past relationship, I didn't quite get on well enough with my extroverted bf - he didn't have the emotional depth I needed and we both found each others' behaviour frustrating. I like 1-to-1s and I've learned not to bombard a guy with serious chat too often but I'd still want a guy who can do that on occasion so I felt safe in the relationship.

 

In terms of interests, I like us to have a few things in common - they don't have to exactly match. For instance, I like reading about certain topics but they wouldn't have to be the same as his but hey we both enjoy reading. I like some forms of outdoor exercise but they don't have to be his favourites if in general we are similar. We just have to have lifestyles which work well together. I think a bit of difference is good as you can learn from each other. The differences just have to be something you can live with. You can't want to change the person because that's not love.

 

For all that's gone wrong in my relationships, it's sometimes those opposites which have bought out the best in me and made me into a better person. I definitely don't want to date a clone of me!

[Larryville]

I read in an article some time ago is that humans seriously overthink this question (I did for a time)

 

Bottom line is we like those who like us in return we prefer consistency in our desires, thoughts, and attitudes. We are drawn to those who are similar to us because it affirms our own characteristics are normal, or desirable.

 

However... The happiest couples never have the same character they just have the best understanding of their differences.

 

Unconditional acceptance of their partner regardless of any perceived “difference”