hawx79 Posted July 28, 2016 Posted July 28, 2016 She is 36 and I am 37. I had a relationship with her only 3 months, and I loved her, but she broke up with me. She claims I was trying to control her. I just wanted to know what she was doing a lot. I made a mistake and now she pushed me out of her life. I cant sleep and I cry a lot. What do I do now? How can I ease the pain? 1
Redhead14 Posted July 28, 2016 Posted July 28, 2016 She is 36 and I am 37. I had a relationship with her only 3 months, and I loved her, but she broke up with me. She claims I was trying to control her. I just wanted to know what she was doing a lot. I made a mistake and now she pushed me out of her life. I cant sleep and I cry a lot. What do I do now? How can I ease the pain? claims I was trying to control her. I just wanted to know what she was doing a lot. -- I would spend more time thinking about why you felt the need to check up on her and keep her under a microscope. You'll need to figure that out before you can move into a new relationship anyway. Other than that, you just need to keep yourself busy with friends, hobbies and doing things that you may have left undone for a while. 5
eagleowl Posted July 28, 2016 Posted July 28, 2016 Other than that, you just need to keep yourself busy with friends, hobbies and doing things that you may have left undone for a while. Or you can stalk her, rewind the reel, think about the past untill your throw up and become sick even of the thought thinking about the past and move on. I did it, because staying occupied and getting fit wasn't my piece of cake. So I smoked two packs a day and killed myself slowly untill I didin't feel sorry for myself anymore 1
GorillaTheater Posted July 28, 2016 Posted July 28, 2016 She is 36 and I am 37. I had a relationship with her only 3 months, and I loved her, but she broke up with me. She claims I was trying to control her. I just wanted to know what she was doing a lot. I made a mistake and now she pushed me out of her life. I cant sleep and I cry a lot. What do I do now? How can I ease the pain? As of another thread of yours, as of a month ago you'd only dated her twice, and now you're at a point where you "cry a lot" because of the breakup? You were waaaaaaay overinvested in that relationship. And yes, likely over-the-top controlling given it's duration. 1
Author hawx79 Posted July 28, 2016 Author Posted July 28, 2016 (edited) As of another thread of yours, as of a month ago you'd only dated her twice, and now you're at a point where you "cry a lot" because of the breakup? You were waaaaaaay overinvested in that relationship. And yes, likely over-the-top controlling given it's duration. Even if it was a short time, I'm still crushed by our break up. I really loved her. I know, everyone tells me this. I guess I'm like a microwave, I fall in love very quickly. But I don't think that's necessary a bad thing. I am 37, I feel if I cant find someone soon, ill be alone forever. And I want children too, with a woman my age you see. I still hope one day she would contact me again. Edited July 28, 2016 by hawx79 1
GorillaTheater Posted July 28, 2016 Posted July 28, 2016 I still hope one day she would contact me again. She might, but she probably won't, so the best thing you could do is learn some lessons from this and incorporate those lessons into how you approach relationships. There's nothing sexy about desperation, man. 1
Satu Posted July 28, 2016 Posted July 28, 2016 This is all very intense and dramatic. "She claims I was trying to control her." "I just wanted to know what she was doing a lot." "Can't sleep." "I cry a lot." " I guess I'm like a microwave." "I fall in love very quickly." "I feel if I can't find someone soon, I'll be alone forever." Everyone has a limit of how much drama they are willing to put up with, and I suspect that your intensity and emotional extremes, went beyond what she was willing to tolerate. Most people want a peaceful and stable existence, and I suspect that she decided that that wasn't possible if she was in a relationship with you. She will have given it some serious thought. People always do. She didn't end it with you "because you made a mistake." She ended it because her thinking led her to conclude that ending it was the best thing to do. I honestly think that you would be wise for you to get into therapy to deal with whatever is underneath all this intensity and desperation, and to give you a chance of having a healthy relationship at some future time. Pick up the phone. Call a few therapists and make an appointment. Take care. 1
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