lily536 Posted July 22, 2016 Posted July 22, 2016 I met this guy on the coffee meets bagel app. I've dated men using diff apps/websites before, but I don't think I've ever come across his style of communication before. We've been talking for 2 weeks. When we were on the app, he sent me 1-2 paragraph-length message per day max. I could tell he was becoming interested (asking questions, joking, being engaged, etc). Now at this point (in my own experience), I'm used to having the guy pick up the pace of the conversation. The more someone is interested, the more they normally try to chat you up a bit more. After a week of this engaged but slooooow approach, he offered me his number to text directly (he was very polite and asked if I was comfortable with it first). Coffee meets bagel caps the days you can speak to someone for, so at that point we either moved to text or ended the chat for good. I thought moving to texting would mean progress, but noooooo. Now we text, but it's the same slooooooooow rhythm. 1-2 semi long messages a day. It really feels like we didn't leave the app. I strongly believe in mirroring the communication style of the guy at first, so I've been sending the same type of message with the same length and frequency as him. I'm sure this is normal for some people, but I've never come across someone who seems very interested (long thoughtful engaging messages) but is so slow to act. And I have my fair share of online dating experience. It's been almost two weeks of the same thing. Is this a normal experience? i like him, but the pace is confusing me.
kolleamm Posted July 22, 2016 Posted July 22, 2016 Sounds almost funny if you ask me I might just send essays daily Ask him more personal questions and see what happens. Like I always say, if someone likes you it's pretty hard to screw it up.
hippychick3 Posted July 22, 2016 Posted July 22, 2016 It sounds like a complete waste of your time. Online is a MEDIUM to meet people, not a substitute for dating. If he's not suggesting you actually meet in person, then he is either married/in a relationship and/or looking for a penpal. Stop responding with long text messages and tell him you prefer to have conversations in person. 1
leogirl876 Posted July 22, 2016 Posted July 22, 2016 He sounds like a waste of time. What you could do is respond to his next text and say I'm not looking for a penpal, you have my number, call me if you'd like to take me out on a date. If he keeps texting, then ignore him. I've come across plenty of people on dating apps like that, that are time wasters. I refuse to apps like that anymore, go to a paid online dating website, at least the people who pay are generally more reliable.
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