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Should I be worried- early stages issue


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Posted

I'm tying not to worry but was after some second opinions.

 

I met a guy on tinder, we have been on not many dates, just 3, but getting on really well, and especially after the last date at the weekend seemed quite connected.

 

We mentioned if seeing each other again and he said he would like to meet again but to be totally honest wasn't sure how he was feeling as had been through a lot and he didn't really know how to put it he said. (Previous marriage and child). He then said that he did like me so not to take it the wrong way.

 

This was fine I confirmed I also liked him and while did also want to meet again it was very early days and there was no pressure beyond that. So we agreed to see how it goes and I said just to let me know about doing something/meeting.

 

However while we spoke the next day since then while previously we were speaking a fair amount over each day's I have had one message over the last two days.

 

Is this something I should be concerned about hat he is fading away and has decided against pursuing any further or is it more of a pull back where he is a bit uncertain and needs space to come to terms with what he wants?

 

Either way I will leave him be and give space, but was just after some opinions on if it's likely an ending or a pause.

Posted

he said he would like to meet again but to be totally honest wasn't sure how he was feeling as had been through a lot and he didn't really know how to put it he said. (Previous marriage and child). He then said that he did like me so not to take it the wrong way.

 

Seems like a red flag to me when people start making excuses.

Posted
Seems like a red flag to me when people start making excuses.

 

I think he's about to fade out, so just mirror his behavior. If you feel him pulling away, then you pull away, if he takes 3 days to return your call, take 3 days to return his. Never invest more in someone than they're willing to do for you.

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Posted

Hun, if a guy ever expresses that he's "not sure"...walk away right there and then!!!

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Posted
I think he's about to fade out, so just mirror his behavior. If you feel him pulling away, then you pull away, if he takes 3 days to return your call, take 3 days to return his. Never invest more in someone than they're willing to do for you.

 

I agree. And to the poster after this quote - walk away. I'm a decent guy. I myself just let something go after 8 dates b/c I wasn't feeling the spark and the chemistry. She was funny, she was smart, she had a lot of the same viewpoints as me, she was balanced but I just wasn't feeling it and out of courtesy to her and respect for myself, I let it go.

 

I can't speak for all guys - but most men will chase what they want pretty hard (unless they're scared, immature, etc) so while it's decent for you to be the bigger person and exercise patience, he'd break over hell and high water and find a way to keep it going regardless of what was going on (within reason of course - having a sick parent is tough if you're close to them)

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