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My massive crush on my co-worker....


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Posted

So I'm 21 and so is she. I've had a massive crush on her for awhile and just recently I've been getting the feeling of a mutual attraction. We were texting earlier about work and she then said "we should drink soon". She's already asked me to a happy hour party she was having awhile ago but it ended up getting cancelled. I think that's a good sign I just don't really know about how to bring it up. Like how do I know if it's a group thing and she brings some friends? I don't want to show up by myself then and look like an idiot. What way should I bring that question up? I get anxiety from all this so I just need some advice. During work I catch both of us making eye contact and smiling, and stuff like that.

 

pls help

 

should note that another girl i work with who's pretty good friends with this girl was teasing about me and her being together.

Posted

Ask her whatever is on your mind. If you are funny about something you can ask someone anything.

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Posted
Ask her whatever is on your mind. If you are funny about something you can ask someone anything.

 

I mean does it seem like she's into me? I'll admit I haven't done this in awhile... I got out of a relationship of 2 years about 5 months ago

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Posted

cmooonnnn anyone?

Posted

Ask her on a date.

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Posted
Ask her on a date.

 

sooo you're saying the signs are good?

Posted

Man up and just ask her out. Don't try to "figure it out" or you'll end up hesitating and potentially losing your shot.

 

Yes, the signs are good. At your age a lot of the time girls will use friends like your coworker is to feel you out.

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Posted

Don't live life with the "what if syndrome" go ask her out and then you'll have an answer one way or another.

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Posted (edited)

Here is the thing. You have to ask her out. People are almost impossible to figure out by pure body language or tiny hints.

 

For example some people are jaded. This can make you think they hate you when deep down they think they don't have a chance with you and really like you.

Edited by kolleamm
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Posted

Women are turned on by confident assertive men....are you being one now?

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Posted

sooo i ended up asking her if she wanted to see a movie and have some drinks. she said yes at first and we both seemed pretty excited about it. she ended up canceling on me but she said she wanted to reschedule. she texted me again after i didn't respond, apologizing again and saying we could hang out the next day as her our other co-worker were getting together... i told her i'd let her know but i just never really felt like doing it.

 

i literally feel like an idiot when it comes to these kind of things and any advice would be wonderful.

Posted

i literally feel like an idiot when it comes to these kind of things and any advice would be wonderful.

She gave you an alternative and you failed at the follow-up.

 

Reschedule for a PROPER date: Not a movie, where you can't really talk to each other and get to know one another. Ask her out to dinner. Treat her like a lady and be impressive.

 

A movie and a drink is lame. It also takes up too much time without an opportunity to really have face-time with one another.

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Posted
She gave you an alternative and you failed at the follow-up.

 

Reschedule for a PROPER date: Not a movie, where you can't really talk to each other and get to know one another. Ask her out to dinner. Treat her like a lady and be impressive.

 

A movie and a drink is lame. It also takes up too much time without an opportunity to really have face-time with one another.

 

you're right i did... but it felt more like a consolation hang out than anything else so i just didn't feel like it.

 

when should i ask her then? how long should i wait?

Posted

I need clarification. Did she cancel to reschedule so the other coworker would also be there, or did you mean she ended up going something with the other coworker and that's why she cancelled but the next day will just be you and her?

 

If she cancelled so that the other coworker would also be coming with you, she is not intersted in you that way and realized you asked her on a date and quickly turned it around to make it "just you coworkers."

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Posted
I need clarification. Did she cancel to reschedule so the other coworker would also be there, or did you mean she ended up going something with the other coworker and that's why she cancelled but the next day will just be you and her?

 

If she cancelled so that the other coworker would also be coming with you, she is not intersted in you that way and realized you asked her on a date and quickly turned it around to make it "just you coworkers."

 

she cancelled on me bc she had a lot going on she didn't realize, she said she wanted to reschedule then.

 

in a different text she said she and another coworker were hanging out the next day and she was seeing if i wanted to come along.

Posted

Hey you had the courage to ask her out so that's a plus for you.

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Posted
Hey you had the courage to ask her out so that's a plus for you.

 

yeah i just need to make it actually happen though

Posted

when should i ask her then? how long should i wait?

Why not right now.

 

Call her and say, "Hey, I'm sorry our plans keep fizzling out. How about I take you out to dinner on XXX?"

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