newbby Posted June 29, 2005 Posted June 29, 2005 mm is really bending over backwards to please me right now, he is also lying to me, i know that. however the nice stuff, its so addictive. same as when it first begins. this time however, i must not melt. i have the upper hand here, i really mustnt lose that.
joodee Posted June 29, 2005 Posted June 29, 2005 What's he saying? You communicating with him? I know what that's like, listening while you KNOW they are lying. The attention is what we like, and that when we don't see straight. Therapy helped me deal with those feelings. Mind you, it's not easy for me either, but I can see that after an hour of ignoring the attention I start to see clear again. Try not to respond to any form of communication for the rest of day. Just try to make it through this day alone. Walk away from the phone and however else he tries to get a hold of you....
westernxer Posted June 29, 2005 Posted June 29, 2005 Care for an exorcism? You've come to the right priest.
TUDOR Posted June 29, 2005 Posted June 29, 2005 Don't give in newbby, no matter how tempting or how good or familiar the attention feels. That road leads no where and I think you know that. You can waste more time by indulging in this fun for now scenario or you can move on and find something that has a chance to go some where. Be strong and just walk away from it for good.
Miffy Posted June 29, 2005 Posted June 29, 2005 I gave in and met mine tonight, after everything I promised myself I wouldn't do. Thought it would feel nice but even though he was saying the right things, it felt like lies and I ended up feeling cheap and guilty. Listen and take notice, please don't do it, when you hear the same lines over and over - why do we do it to ourselves.
ConfusedInOC Posted June 29, 2005 Posted June 29, 2005 Originally posted by newbby mm is really bending over backwards to please me right now, he is also lying to me, i know that. however the nice stuff, its so addictive. same as when it first begins. this time however, i must not melt. i have the upper hand here, i really mustnt lose that. Why aren't you in NC right now?
whichwayisup Posted June 29, 2005 Posted June 29, 2005 Don't give in to that push/pull thing!!! He is pushing your buttons! When you feel yourself caving, REMEMBER the s***ty things he's done and said. Remember the "feel good, he's into me right now" only will last for a very short time. Is it worth it? To feel that and then have a door slammed in your face again? Be strong - Keep the wall up around you. Do NC.
Author newbby Posted June 30, 2005 Author Posted June 30, 2005 hi guys, thankyou for all your replies. westernxr thanks for making me laugh everyone else, to answer your questions, yes we were speaking, supposed to be being friends, only he was insisting his marriage was on the rocks and that him and i were just friends, but the way he was speaking to me was more than just friendly. he also started showing up in public as though to say to me that the friendship is all above board, however i did notice him looking around alot! lol, ridiculous!!! anyway, finally last night i spoke to him, and said, if we really are to be friends its about time you were honest, you seem to think i am completely unaware of your lies, but i'm not, and a friendship based on this amount of distrust is really no friendship at all. he insisted so vehemently that his marriage really was in trouble that i said, "oh dear, in that case i really had best leave you alone so that you can concentrate on sorting this out." and that was that, he is blocked and deleted, i didnt leave it on bad terms, i said i will miss talking to him but that really this is for the best. i have nothing to wait for, i only expect from him more of the same, if anything. i am not treating this as a punishment to him or a game or anything. i dont feel that i am giving up some crazy addiction, but i definetly will miss his company. as for myself i have a lot to work on, and i have some more dates to go on with the very nice sg
TUDOR Posted June 30, 2005 Posted June 30, 2005 Good for you newbby!! Sounds like you are moving in the right direction!
Author newbby Posted June 30, 2005 Author Posted June 30, 2005 Good for you newbby!! Sounds like you are moving in the right direction! thankyou Is it wrong to say I'm very proud of you? thankyou
Author newbby Posted July 1, 2005 Author Posted July 1, 2005 i am an idiot, i spoke to him again, it was purely boredom, i dont even think i have any feelings anymore at all. its just boredom. we spoke of nothing in particular, and he irritated me but still...
ww Posted July 1, 2005 Posted July 1, 2005 doubt you can be more idiot than i am this morning i appeared in front of my mother in law totally naked. ( i thought it was my H in kitchen preparing the coffee instead it was his mum looking for him. we both almost fainted.
ww Posted July 2, 2005 Posted July 2, 2005 i wish I could say ANYTIME...but really ..I am not quiet sure if I want this to happen again
Recommended Posts