10 months later, and she's in a new relationship. Still, I can't let go.

[JustAnotherLostLove]

We're still Facebook friends, but I've maintained absolutely zero contact since January first. Shortly after our break up, she began hanging with this guy who was always in the picture, but had a wife and kid at the time. Well, apparently he don't anymore, cause she's announced their relationship.

 

It's crazy, cause I waited for this moment, knowing that it'd be my license to let go for good. But even tho I know all hope is lost, I still can't severe that last thread. I've put all the major things away. Pictures, letters, random items, everything. But two things remain, our Facebook friendship, and her shaving cream in my shower, lol. I don't know why, out of all things, I'm having trouble disposing of that.

 

We were together for over 3 years, spoke of marriage, and even picked names for our children. I was also very close with her family. But when she randomly let me go (I had no idea something was up until about 2 days prior), her family let me go as well. They referred to me as their son in law, but completely disowned me after the fact. I have not spoken to them once, as side from the time I wished her mom happy mothers day, and got an awkward response. I should have known tho, that was out of line.

 

Thoughts? I know I'll get bagged on. But I think that's what I want, I need to hear it.

 

Thanks.

Edited July 19, 2016 by JustAnotherLostLove

[ExpatInItaly]

We're still Facebook friends, but I've maintained absolutely zero contact since January first. Shortly after our break up, she began hanging with this guy who was always in the picture, but had a wife and kid at the time. Well, apparently he don't anymore, cause she's announced their relationship.

 

It's crazy, cause I waited for this moment, knowing that it'd be my license to let go for good. But even tho I know all hope is lost, I still can't severe that last thread. I've put all the major things away. Pictures, letters, random items, everything. But two things remain, our Facebook friendship, and her shaving cream in my shower, lol. I don't know why, out of all things, I'm having trouble disposing of that.

 

I was also very close with her family. But when she randomly let me go (I had no idea something was up until about 2 days prior), her family let me go as well. They referred to me as their son in law, but completely disowned me after the fact. I have not spoken to them once, as side from the time I wished her mom happy mothers day, and got an awkward response. I should have known tho, that was out of line.

 

Thoughts? I know I'll get bagged on. But I think that's what I want, I need to hear it.

 

Thanks.

 

Firstly, these two statements contradict each other. You're not No Contact if you're still friends on any social media.

 

Secondly, delete her from FB. If you don't, prepare yourself for an onslaught of "happy couple" pictures, cutesy posts, and more painful reminders of what isn't yours anymore.

 

Thirdly, ditch the shaving cream immediately. You can't let it go because that would be the last tangible piece of her left in your home. But you really need to toss it.

 

It's not easy when an ex moves on, but you're really making it harder for yourself to do so. You know have definitive evidence that she has closed that chapter in her life and has started a new one. You need to do the same. No more FB friends, no more shaving cream, and certainly no more contacting her family members.

[JustAnotherLostLove]

Firstly, these two statements contradict each other. You're not No Contact if you're still friends on any social media.

 

Secondly, delete her from FB. If you don't, prepare yourself for an onslaught of "happy couple" pictures, cutesy posts, and more painful reminders of what isn't yours anymore.

 

Thirdly, ditch the shaving cream immediately. You can't let it go because that would be the last tangible piece of her left in your home. But you really need to toss it.

 

It's not easy when an ex moves on, but you're really making it harder for yourself to do so. You know have definitive evidence that she has closed that chapter in her life and has started a new one. You need to do the same. No more FB friends, no more shaving cream, and certainly no more contacting her family members.

 

Lol, "no more shaving cream". But in all seriousness, I agree. Upon thinking about it, that's exactly why it's here.

[Giggles666]

Yeah man, toss that shaving cream and lose the FB connection. You've been dwelling since January, no wonder it sucks.

 

Also a lot of what you are experiencing might be your ego, I was over a girl for months. We were long time friends so we got back to being friends recently, the other day I found out she is dating someone (small town) and bam, right back into "this sucksville". It's my ego/self-esteem. You never really know if you are OK, so go No Contact for real this time.

 

It's over, you're toast. Please don't hold onto false hope because the next step is waiting around to see if they break up.

 

Sorry for your pain, do the right thing...no contact and move on.

[JewelD]

You can't let go because you're holding on. Block her on fb. Just get off social media entirely if you can't resist looking at her page. You're not going to see anything on there that's going to make you feel better.

 

And with SO's family members, you have to remember, they are HER family, not yours. Of course they liked you when you guys were together, but now that it's over, those connections (however strong you thought they were), need to end as well. If you're not talking to your ex, DEFINITELY don't talk to her family. Erase their numbers, erase and block hers.

 

No contact helps, it really does. But you have to actually commit to it. You haven't with the facebook friendship, so you've been dwelling on this for much longer than you need to.

 

You have to train yourself to not think about the breakup as often and to view it in a different perspective. It takes time, but you won't always feel this way.

 

Take up some new hobbies, focus on self improvement. You should always be striving to be a better person and doing that will give you something new to focus on besides the breakup.

[JustAnotherLostLove]

Yeah man, toss that shaving cream and lose the FB connection. You've been dwelling since January, no wonder it sucks.

 

Also a lot of what you are experiencing might be your ego, I was over a girl for months. We were long time friends so we got back to being friends recently, the other day I found out she is dating someone (small town) and bam, right back into "this sucksville". It's my ego/self-esteem. You never really know if you are OK, so go No Contact for real this time.

 

It's over, you're toast. Please don't hold onto false hope because the next step is waiting around to see if they break up.

 

Sorry for your pain, do the right thing...no contact and move on.

 

I won't deny your ego theory, it's perfectly legit. But what I think I'm really having trouble with, is our future that was lost, and more specifically, the children that I already imagined having a relationship with. For me, it was a daughter. I knew her name, I knew what she looked like. And I imagined protecting her, in a way that I was not able to do for my sister. So much was lost, and I virtually have no family. I was really looking forward to creating my own.

[JustAnotherLostLove]

I'm about to do it. I'm throwing everything away, and deleting her right now. Crazy, I actually had the nerve to think that I already let her go. But now I realize, I'm just starting to now.

[SevenCity]

I won't deny your ego theory, it's perfectly legit. But what I think I'm really having trouble with, is our future that was lost, and more specifically, the children that I already imagined having a relationship with. For me, it was a daughter. I knew her name, I knew what she looked like. And I imagined protecting her, in a way that I was not able to do for my sister. So much was lost, and I virtually have no family. I was really looking forward to creating my own.

 

As luck would have it, there are billions of women out there who are fertile and

just your type. A portion of those women would love to date / marry you.

 

All you have to do is find her.

 

Good move to throw out the shaving cream. Make an event out of it. Recognize this as the day you let go and started the next chapter in your life.

 

Learn from your mistakes and knock one off before the next one comes along because she'll be much hotter and you don't want to nut too early

[Marc878]

She's not having any thoughts of you because she moved on like joh need to.

 

You want to break this?

 

Trash everything of her block FB and quit wasting your life.

 

Or not. Either way she doesn't care.

[asphyxis]

I ca relate. Although my relationship was LDR, it was the best relationship I have EVER had. Sparks flew instantly, and our chemistry was amazing when we saw each other. We talked about a future, and having kids, etc. The hardest part is letting that go. I remember all the wonderful things he said to me that made me feel so lucky and full of life. I've questioned if I messed up the best relationship I'll ever have, but our relationship had become dead weight the last 7 months. We grew distant, and my personal life issues conflicted with how I felt inside with where my life was going. I don't blame him for dumping me. The past few days on here have helped me tremendously. You aren't alone in feeling messed up over what could have been, but it's not. So it's time to let that go.

[JustAnotherLostLove]

She's not having any thoughts of you because she moved on like joh need to.

 

You want to break this?

 

Trash everything of her block FB and quit wasting your life.

 

Or not. Either way she doesn't care.

 

I deleted her and blocker her on FB, and threw the shaving cream away. Moments later, I noticed I was out of shaving cream... So I pulled it out of the trash and used it on my face. I will throw it away for good once it's empty.

 

I'm cheap.