tjk64 Posted July 17, 2016 Posted July 17, 2016 Met a girl online. Went on two dates, they both went really well and the chemistry was great. I noticed this week however when texting and calling her, something seemed off. After our second date we had planned our third date to go kayaking this weekend. Based on how lukewarm she was acting all week, I was surprised when she said she still wanted to go. So we went today, and while things went ok, I could still tell something was off. Thoughts? If she wasn't interested anymore, why would she keep talking to me or going on dates?
Bialy Posted July 17, 2016 Posted July 17, 2016 Things are still very new. I wouldn't overthink it. You two don't know each other very well - she might be going through something in her personal/family life that is affecting her mood. These lukewarm feelings might not have anything to do with you. If she didn't like you, she would not have went on a third date. Is there a plan to meet again? 1
Author tjk64 Posted July 17, 2016 Author Posted July 17, 2016 That's what I'm thinking but I'm just not sure. I asked her about coming over and watching a movie sometime this week and she said she'd let me know what day she is free....so, I dunno
Bialy Posted July 17, 2016 Posted July 17, 2016 You can say something like, "Hope everything is OK. Really enjoyed seeing you last time, but I noticed you were a bit quiet. Is everything alright?" She may or may not answer your question, but it's worth a shot if you're uncertain.
Gr8fuln2020 Posted July 17, 2016 Posted July 17, 2016 If she didn't like you, she would not have went on a third date. Well, this is not entirely so. People need distractions, companionship, however lukewarm they may be. She could have gone with you b/c she had no other options at the moment. I'm being real. I'm also hoping that keeping things in perspective will keep you from over-compensating or over-extending yourself emotionally. Don't try too hard, but continue showing her that you are interested. Look, you are online dating. Do you think that she's stopped looking? Found something...hmmm...better? Have you stopped looking? Just be as objective as you can. This is a very new relationship. 1
Author tjk64 Posted July 17, 2016 Author Posted July 17, 2016 Valid points, although if it were me, I wouldn't keep going out with someone I wasn't all that interested in.
Gr8fuln2020 Posted July 17, 2016 Posted July 17, 2016 Valid points, although if it were me, I wouldn't keep going out with someone I wasn't all that interested in. People make the habit of projecting...don't project yourself onto others. Just be "safe."
leogirl876 Posted July 17, 2016 Posted July 17, 2016 Honestly, if a guy asked me to come over and watch a movie just 3 dates in, that would make me wonder about him. That's what you do after you've been dating a while. Asking a girl to come over and watch a movie suggests you're just trying to get in her pants, and are cheap. Please wait at least the 7th date to do that. I'd be turned off if a guy asked me that too early on.
NIGHT1985 Posted July 17, 2016 Posted July 17, 2016 Honestly, if a guy asked me to come over and watch a movie just 3 dates in, that would make me wonder about him. That's what you do after you've been dating a while. Asking a girl to come over and watch a movie suggests you're just trying to get in her pants, and are cheap. Please wait at least the 7th date to do that. I'd be turned off if a guy asked me that too early on. I'm glad I've never dated someone with your mentality.
smackie9 Posted July 17, 2016 Posted July 17, 2016 Have you tried to kiss her yet? Some women base their interest on your desire for them. If you don't try to hold their hand or show your desire, they start to wonder how interested you are, and may feel things are off.
bu2002 Posted July 17, 2016 Posted July 17, 2016 Have you guys had any physical activity? Anything from holding hands, to a kiss, to making out? Cuddling? Anything at all? With online dating, you have to realize she's likely talking to other men. Online dating takes on a shopping mentality. It could be she's talking to someone else who also piques her interest and wants to see how things progress there.
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