Freshly broken up. Need support. :(

[whatsherface]

Hi guys, I'm back.

 

It's been a while since I posted here. I went through a really tough breakup a while back ago and I finally managed to recover from it after a year. It took a lot of time and will-power for me to heal. After two years of being single, I finally found someone I was attracted to. The chemistry with this new guy was so much stronger than the one between my previous ex and I. I was so excited and happy. We both liked going on adventures so we would do a lot of fun things together. It was invigorating. He made me laugh way more than my ex did and I never had a dull moment with him. I thought this was going to last. I guess we crashed and burned too fast.

 

He was really sweet and caring in the beginning, he would want to see me everyday and would express how excited he was to see me. However, in the last three weeks of our relationship he just stopped trying. The conversations staled. It no longer felt like he cared about me. He used to text me quite often but the texts dropped to one a day. He also stopped saying sweet and loving things to me. Worst of all, it seemed like he was no longer excited to see me. This change was devastating for me since it felt like I was the only one putting any effort in. Yesterday I finally mustered up the courage to break off our short-lived 5 month relationship.

 

I feel so awful. It makes me feel like crap that the person I like could just suddenly stop caring about me. My self-esteem is at an all-time low. I feel like there's something wrong with me, but at the same time I know that I am deserving of love and care. I just wish it didn't have to turn out this way. I thought I had finally found someone I could be with long-term. This hurts so much. He was smart, funny, kind, successful, and we got along so easily I'm so scared I'll never find anyone like that again.

Edited July 15, 2016 by whatsherface

[Zahara]

I feel so awful. It makes me feel like crap that the person I like could just suddenly stop caring about me. My self-esteem is at an all-time low. I feel like there's something wrong with me, but at the same time I know that I am deserving of love and care. I just wish it didn't have to turn out this way. I thought I had finally found someone I could be with long-term. This hurts so much. He was smart, funny, kind, successful, and we got along so easily I'm so scared I'll never find anyone like that again.

 

There isn't anything wrong with you but that maybe your picker is off. I believe that the ones that shoot off the blocks really fast, are the ones that crash and burn really quick. I'm sure there are exceptions but from experience and the stories I've read on LS, it's often the ones to tread carefully with. It's not a reflection as to who you are nor does it define your worth. It's who he is and how he maneuvers and manages his relationships. It falls on his own emotional capabilities -- it's not about you.

 

He's someone you've known for 5 months. All that superficial stuff. You've placed him on a pedestal that he does not deserve to be on and neither do you need to limit your future based on a guy that came into your life and soon enough hurt you within months. He's not all that.

[Neel]

Hi guys, I'm back.

 

It's been a while since I posted here. I went through a really tough breakup a while back ago and I finally managed to recover from it after a year. It took a lot of time and will-power for me to heal. After two years of being single, I finally found someone I was attracted to. The chemistry with this new guy was so much stronger than the one between my previous ex and I. I was so excited and happy. We both liked going on adventures so we would do a lot of fun things together. It was invigorating. He made me laugh way more than my ex did and I never had a dull moment with him. I thought this was going to last. I guess we crashed and burned too fast.

 

He was really sweet and caring in the beginning, he would want to see me everyday and would express how excited he was to see me. However, in the last three weeks of our relationship he just stopped trying. The conversations staled. It no longer felt like he cared about me. He used to text me quite often but the texts dropped to one a day. He also stopped saying sweet and loving things to me. Worst of all, it seemed like he was no longer excited to see me. This change was devastating for me since it felt like I was the only one putting any effort in. Yesterday I finally mustered up the courage to break off our short-lived 5 month relationship.

 

I feel so awful. It makes me feel like crap that the person I like could just suddenly stop caring about me. My self-esteem is at an all-time low. I feel like there's something wrong with me, but at the same time I know that I am deserving of love and care. I just wish it didn't have to turn out this way. I thought I had finally found someone I could be with long-term. This hurts so much. He was smart, funny, kind, successful, and we got along so easily I'm so scared I'll never find anyone like that again.

 

FMO, thats a pretty common pattern. Happens a lot. However, it does not necessarily mean that he lost all of his interest in you. If you dig and go deep enough you can try and figure anything for your person. There are many stages that a love has to go through, and that stages are the ones that make it clean and well made. What i would recommend to you, since you said he ceased contact, is a simple thing. You cease contact too. An example to give you is that if at its highest form is 10/10 and then, he ceases to 4/10, you cease to 5/10. It doesn't have to be below it. The best way to reflect on the inside of a person, is to act like a mirror.

 

Since you broke it off, if you deeply care for this person, you can just initiate short contact again, however this time become the mirror and reflect.