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My wife's betrayal bordering infidelity is tearing every emotion I have to shreds

Joker0530

By Joker0530
in Infidelity

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While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

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fenix Established Member

fenix

Posted
Posted
dollars to doughnuts they did hook up. A man does not keep texting a woman if nothing is happening. Your ww as all ww's only confess to what you can prove.

 

 

She is hiding more info. Time for a polygraph test.

 

^^^^ this ^^^^^

NTV Established Member

NTV

Posted
Posted

fyi - you can forgive her and divorce her at the same time...

  • Like 1
Cephalopod Established Member

Cephalopod

Posted
Posted
I've got to be honest with you I think her having some sort of affair as a response was wrong. She should have up and divorced you the day you disrespected her in her own home by forcing your deadbeat pregnant daughter and her kid move in against your wife's wishes.

 

 

That is your wife's home too, why do you think it is ok that just because your daughter is admittedly a major f*ckup and major strain on your wife, you could force your wife to live with that in HER OWN home? Why is it because your daughter fails every chance you give her, your wife has to pay for you not allowing your daughter to take responsibility?

 

 

If I had a wife that did something like that to me, the total lack of respect would probably be the wave I rode to the divorce lawyers office the next day.

 

 

I think the wrong person is playing victim here.

 

Granted, he showed her disrespect.

 

What the hell does this have to do with her cheating?

 

Two totally separate issues.

  • Like 3
spanz1 Established Member

spanz1

Posted
Posted

"a man she had sex with 25 years ago before we were together "

 

 

don't you think you are over-reacting a little over this? If she has been faithful while you were married, that should be enough

WilyWill Established Member

WilyWill

Posted
Posted
don't you think you are over-reacting a little over this? If she has been faithful while you were married, that should be enough

 

I think he's more hurt about the fact that he was lied to from the get go, hurt about the EA/sexting that happened recently, and hurt about her intent to turn it into a PA.

  • Like 2
Cephalopod Established Member

Cephalopod

Posted
Posted
"a man she had sex with 25 years ago before we were together "

 

 

don't you think you are over-reacting a little over this? If she has been faithful while you were married, that should be enough

 

:confused:

 

Faithful until now.

 

If I carry a gun for twenty years and never use it, but then one day pull it out and shoot you in the leg for no good reason, do all the years I didn't shoot you make up for the gaping bloody hole in your leg and immense pain?

 

It is not all about the cheating, it is about her lying and sneaking around, and about the possibility that she has checked out of the marriage and is looking for ways to have her cake and eat it too. Her intent to cheat on him is almost as painful as her actually going through with it.

BluesPower Established Member

BluesPower

Posted
Posted

Your wife is having a physical affair it is almost certain. Locking the phone, texting for 2 years?????

 

 

Brother you have got to wake up. I know you don't want to believe it but you have go see what is happening.

spanz1 Established Member

spanz1

Posted
Posted
I think he's more hurt about the fact that he was lied to from the get go, hurt about the EA/sexting that happened recently, and hurt about her intent to turn it into a PA.

 

i do not necessarily think a partner has a RIGHT to ask about a lover's past that happened before they met. That is none of his business.

 

If she chooses to tell him, fine. but it he is demanding to know, and from the tone she figures out telling him the truth of past lovers is going to wig him out, i fully support her fibbing about it.

 

It would be TOTALLY different if she cheated after they were married! But she did not.

understand50 Established Member

understand50

Posted
Posted
i do not necessarily think a partner has a RIGHT to ask about a lover's past that happened before they met. That is none of his business.

 

If she chooses to tell him, fine. but it he is demanding to know, and from the tone she figures out telling him the truth of past lovers is going to wig him out, i fully support her fibbing about it.

 

It would be TOTALLY different if she cheated after they were married! But she did not.

 

I would agree, but add "unless that past is effecting the relationship in the present" then all should be shared. In other words, there is no hard a fast rule. When your wife is in communication with a past lover, yes this is effecting the relationship. Our rule, is when my wife, or I, is in contract, or a "friendship with a past lover" we let the other know there is a past. I think this is common courtesy and short circuits any problems.

  • Like 2
BluesPower Established Member

BluesPower

Posted
Posted

We would all like some type of update if you have one.

 

 

 

 

Joker,

 

 

Understand that your wife had and probably is having a physical affair with this man. SHE IS PROBABLY STILL SLEEPING WITH HIM.

 

 

 

 

You have got to wake up and kick her out and file for divorce. She how she acts then. None and I mean none of this is your fault.

 

 

 

 

Please for your own good wake up and man up. There tons of other women out there that want and will respect a great person like you.

 

 

 

 

Believe me I have been through this. Got out now.

spanz1 Established Member

spanz1

Posted
Posted

 

Understand that your wife had and probably is having a physical affair with this man. SHE IS PROBABLY STILL SLEEPING WITH HIM.

.

 

i can not, base on what the OP said, be sure she is having a physical affair.

he can be certain it was an emotional affair (EA), but a LOT of people get tempted, then find they can not cross the line to make it physical sex.

 

a lot of women, after a long marriage, start feeling taken for granted. then some player comes along, throws them some compliments, and they get turned on by it. THAT is human nature. What they THEN do is more important....if they go have unexplained "business trips" to the mans location.....you can assume they are doing the deed. But if there is no other evidence they actually met (credit card receipts, lots of girls nights out, etc)....then you just can not assume it happened.

 

Keep asking about the details. Liars will not be able to tell the same story over and over, and will mess up the small details. So you want to get her talking about it, and keep communicating.

BluesPower Established Member

BluesPower

Posted
Posted

spanz1, have you ever been cheated on? I have. To both of you I am telling you that she has been screwing this other guy for at least 2 years. Women do not behave this way if they are not. Joker she is using you.

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