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Unsolicited Selfies - Turn on or Turn off??


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Posted

I just started texting this guy (yesterday) who I "met" via online dating. Talked about getting dinner but we have not made plans yet. Our conversation yesterday was decent, no complaints....until today. He sends me a selfie of himself (no top on) from the chest up with those dog ears from snap chat, and his lips are puckered. My first reaction was "ew". :sick:

 

Anyways, my question is...am I overreacting or is this the norm? Lol I was just so turned off to this I have no interest in meeting him anymore. It screams little boy. How can I politely tell him in not interested anymore. :laugh: We are both in our mid twenties btw.

Posted

Politely tell him that you don't think you are a match.

 

Be honest and upfront with Puppy Ears because there are plenty of ghosting and fading stories that come to light here on LS.

  • Like 4
Posted

Yes, I know younger mostly people here will totally disagree but the evidence is mounting…

 

Selfies Linked to Narcissism, Addiction and Mental Illness, Say Scientists

 

Selfies Linked to Narcissism, Addiction and Mental Illness, Say Scientists

 

When I browse Facebook and I see my female friends post a bunch of selfies, something is never right, like clockwork. Narcissism is running rampant everywhere.

  • Like 1
Posted

If you reacted positively, the next one would have been a picture of his junk.

  • Like 2
Posted
Politely tell him that you don't think you are a match.

 

Be honest and upfront with Puppy Ears because there are plenty of ghosting and fading stories that come to light here on LS.

 

To each their own but I'd also be inclined to add I didn't like the puppy ears so he could possibly add that to his knowledge base going forward. ;)

  • Like 1
Posted

Yeah, I feel ya. I'm not a huge fan of selfies. I mean, take one pic and send it to me but after that, lets be more creative about how we do things. If you're tossing me the same ridiculous duck-face pose in various states of dress one after the other without prompting than it becomes a HUGE turn off for me, regardless of your age.

 

Then again, I'm in my forties which makes my tolerance for such things is a lot less tolerant. I know so many twenty something year olds are obsessed with snapchat and selfies and it's how so many you communicate but I'd feel the same way you're feeling if I were in your shoes.

 

Just my two cents.

  • Like 2
Posted

I think it would be really funny to say something like 'oh you like dogs too???!?!' and then plan a date and stand him up at the dog pound. It's probably mean, though.

 

 

Alas <sigh> not many take that sort of humor the right way....

Posted

What is with this dog ears and muzzle thing. I swear, at least 2 out or 3 profiles I see online are women with this crap. That or the crown of flowers thing...

:sick:

 

 

 

  • Author
Posted
Politely tell him that you don't think you are a match.

 

Be honest and upfront with Puppy Ears because there are plenty of ghosting and fading stories that come to light here on LS.

 

Yea, I have no intention of ghosting him....I just feel bad letting someone down! Because he seemed like a sweet guy.

  • Author
Posted

What is with this dog ears and muzzle thing. I swear, at least 2 out or 3 profiles I see online are women with this crap. That or the crown of flowers thing...

:sick:

 

 

 

 

Idk either! It's even worse when a guy does it lol:laugh:. I didn't think it was cute!

Posted

Deal breaker. I think it shows what kind of girls he's interested in....juveniles.:sick::sick::sick:

Posted

Um...no.

 

I don't want unsolicited selfies until after we've met and been dating a while. And even then, it's really not necessary unless its to show me a new outfit you've bought or something.

 

And I certainly don't want a topless one if we've never met (yes, believe it or not, not all us guys need to see you women topless right off the bat!)

 

I don't blame you for your thoughts of ..Ewww. Theres a maturity level that's lacking in his sending that type of selfie especially. Topless and dog ears with a duck face...really?

  • Like 4
Posted (edited)

So you are willing to let him go at such an early stage because he sent you a selfie?

 

I can completely understand if he sent a dick pic or something low class like that, but a shirtless selfie with a filter? That seems kind of shallow to me.

 

Selfies are not my thing, but damn, that seems pretty petty to do.

 

[]

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
deleted personal attack/insult ~6
  • Author
Posted (edited)
So you are willing to let him go at such an early stage because he sent you a selfie?

 

I can completely understand if he sent a dick pic or something low class like that, but a shirtless selfie with a filter? That seems kind of shallow to me.

 

Selfies are not my thing, but damn, that seems pretty petty to do.

 

[]

 

I'm not being shallow at all. Im more interested in having a normal conversation with him....not communicating about what he looks like today. If anything, he's being the shallow one....So you make no sense.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
  • Like 1
Posted

Text him back and tell him that selfies are for teenage girls.

Posted

Hate topless selfies. But lots of guys mistakenly think girls like that, so that alone wouldn't make me bail. That alone would cause me to make a lighthearted comment that conveyed my distaste for those types of pics.

 

However, using Snapchat selfies with puppy dog ears or any other filter is complete ewwwwww unless you're 12. That would be more of a turnoff for me.

  • Like 2
Posted
So you are willing to let him go at such an early stage because he sent you a selfie?

 

I can completely understand if he sent a dick pic or something low class like that, but a shirtless selfie with a filter? That seems kind of shallow to me.

 

Selfies are not my thing, but damn, that seems pretty petty to do.

 

[]

 

See, this is where guys and gals think differently. We (many guys) seem to think that women would like to see us nude, or partially nude, to get an idea of if they'd like us physically or not.

 

That's guy think, how we may think about a woman and her body, it's generally not how women consider a mans body. Sending a topless pic, or having a topless profile pic on a dating site, is more turn off than turn on to many. Or, so I have been informed.

 

I'd bet it's probably more the topless part than the dog ears part that bothered Mssweet. Though, it could well be a toss up there! Am I correct?

  • Author
Posted
See, this is where guys and gals think differently. We (many guys) seem to think that women would like to see us nude, or partially nude, to get an idea of if they'd like us physically or not.

 

That's guy think, how we may think about a woman and her body, it's generally not how women consider a mans body. Sending a topless pic, or having a topless profile pic on a dating site, is more turn off than turn on to many. Or, so I have been informed.

 

I'd bet it's probably more the topless part than the dog ears part that bothered Mssweet. Though, it could well be a toss up there! Am I correct?

 

Its a combination of being a selfie, shirtless, puppy ears and kissy face that bothered me, only within a 24 hr period of texting this guy lol. I just feel bad turning around and telling him I'm no longer interested...Lol. He already friended me on Facebook too (didn't accept yet though) Ugh :laugh:

Posted
Its a combination of being a selfie, shirtless, puppy ears and kissy face that bothered me, only within a 24 hr period of texting this guy lol. I just feel bad turning around and telling him I'm no longer interested...Lol. He already friended me on Facebook too (didn't accept yet though) Ugh :laugh:

 

Oh brother, are you sure he's not really a 12 year old girl??

  • Like 3
Posted
I just started texting this guy (yesterday) who I "met" via online dating. Talked about getting dinner but we have not made plans yet. Our conversation yesterday was decent, no complaints....until today. He sends me a selfie of himself (no top on) from the chest up with those dog ears from snap chat, and his lips are puckered. My first reaction was "ew". :sick:

 

Anyways, my question is...am I overreacting or is this the norm? Lol I was just so turned off to this I have no interest in meeting him anymore. It screams little boy. How can I politely tell him in not interested anymore. :laugh: We are both in our mid twenties btw.

 

You're not overreacting. If someone turns you off, you're not obligated to continue giving them your time or attention.

 

If I were you I would actually tell the guy that sending someone "selfies" (especially shirtless) is totally moronic and self indulgent. Taking pictures of yourself in general is asinine. I'd ask him why he did that and see what lame excuse he comes up with.

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