Sara1989 Posted July 10, 2016 Posted July 10, 2016 Went for lunch, thought was going really well...conversation flowed then I asked him if I was his first date from od. He said yes then told me he had a date Thursday though I was bit shocked, he then asked me if I had any dates lined up and he would thought I would have loads. Surely that is a straight out rejection? who tells someone they got a date with someone else lined up? I am dating these guys and cant seem to get to a second date, I am feeling so ugly and unattractive. Maybe my pictures are too nice?
Art_Critic Posted July 10, 2016 Posted July 10, 2016 to me it doesn't sound like a rejection but a comment that was designed to try and make himself look more marketable and in demand...
trippi1432 Posted July 10, 2016 Posted July 10, 2016 Agree with Art Critic.... I try to establish what the dating style is like with a person before I agree to meet them for a date. I also won't just meet someone from a dating site until after we have had conversation for at least a few weeks. You can get to know a person's personality in texting, email and talking on the phone prior to meeting them. How long did you and this person actually chat/talk prior to the lunch?
central Posted July 10, 2016 Posted July 10, 2016 I rejected - or was rejected - dozens of women after a first meet. And this does not sound like a rejection, just honesty that he is looking and has not yet met someone with whom he wants to be exclusive (and that takes time). You both have to evaluate whether or not there is sufficient compatibility and attraction to make a second date desirable. And of course he will have other meets lined up if possible - as should you - because it is typical to not hit it off on a first meet, and you need to have a continuous stream of prospects if you really want to finds someone really compatible. You'll know if he found you potentially compatible if he asks you out again. Would you want to see him again? 1
Author Sara1989 Posted July 10, 2016 Author Posted July 10, 2016 I rejected - or was rejected - dozens of women after a first meet. And this does not sound like a rejection, just honesty that he is looking and has not yet met someone with whom he wants to be exclusive (and that takes time). You both have to evaluate whether or not there is sufficient compatibility and attraction to make a second date desirable. And of course he will have other meets lined up if possible - as should you - because it is typical to not hit it off on a first meet, and you need to have a continuous stream of prospects if you really want to finds someone really compatible. You'll know if he found you potentially compatible if he asks you out again. Would you want to see him again? I would go out with him again, I been on a lot of first dates and I did feel we got on well and have a lot in common but it did feel like a slap in the face when he said that. If your potentially intrested in a girl, would you really tell her you got a date lined up with someone else? really? He said he text me when we said bye but I am 90% sure he wont want see me again which sucks...another rejection...must be v ugly.
Gaeta Posted July 10, 2016 Posted July 10, 2016 I would go out with him again, I been on a lot of first dates and I did feel we got on well and have a lot in common but it did feel like a slap in the face when he said that. If your potentially intrested in a girl, would you really tell her you got a date lined up with someone else? really? He said he text me when we said bye but I am 90% sure he wont want see me again which sucks...another rejection...must be v ugly. The fact he said he had another date Thursday is irrelevant. He maybe just wanted to brag that he gets a lot of dates to raise his value in your eyes. Now, when you leave a 1st date and the mans says 'he will text you' THAT is indicative he is not very interested. Not being successful at a first date doesn't mean you're ugly. I have a female friend who's pretty and is not successful at first dates, it's not her looks but her attitude the problem. She constantly thinks she is not good enough so it transpires in her meetings and it's not attractive. Men don't want to date women that think little of themselves.
smackie9 Posted July 10, 2016 Posted July 10, 2016 The reality is most who are using OLD are multi dating. Now do you want to know they are dating others of would you prefer they cloak that information? I agree with Gaeta. Attitude and body language can be the reason for your lack of success. I suggest finding a male friend to go out on a date with and get some honest input. Or locate a dating coach. Some will offer their services for free.
Erik30 Posted July 10, 2016 Posted July 10, 2016 I wouldn't call that a rejection, just a really dumb thing to say on a first date. No one wants to hear that. So he's probably inexperienced, or thought mentioning other dates would make him look more attractive. 3
Author Sara1989 Posted July 10, 2016 Author Posted July 10, 2016 Well update, I texted him as I couldn't wait...but he asked me out on an second date:) we agreed Friday even though he have cancel something he has with a friend to see me. On multi dating thing, yes I expect him or myself to date other people but you don't tell a person your on a date with that...he admits dating is alien to him and new so I given him a pass. 1
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