Maximboi23 Posted July 9, 2016 Posted July 9, 2016 Hello everyone, I have posted plenty of times In the breaking up section but figured I can post my way of coping here. I have ever coped well with any of my girlfriends leaving, from the first one ever to the last. Maybe just have that void that gets filled and taken out and emptied when they leave. I really get hurt badly with people always leaving me. Maybe the emotional separation from my parents since I was a toddler to now. I lost my fiancé almost 2 years ago and still have not dealt with the loss. I loved her deeply and her son and finally said to myself that I finally got what I always desired which was a family. Her leaving left a huge scar on my heart and head from then to even now. Last I checked she was already married and had a kid. I was seeing someone last summer on and off. She was lovely and I really thought she would make me move forward and us to be happy together cause I thought I would never find anyone I loved after my fiancé. Then as weeks went by she was tellin me she had last drug addiction and been clean. It upset me cause i have someone in my family who is an addict. So I stood by her and she just was a lot of baggage I guess coming from 10 year toxic relationship and having no car or license due to her many tickets and liscence being taken. We were so intimate and close and loving in beginning. Then out of no where she said she was done cause I was asking for too much reassurance and was gone. Months later we reunited and this time she wanted to take things slow. We would go to same bars everythime I saw her. I would pick her up and pay for everything. Even paid some of her bills and medical prescription bills. Thousands of Dollars but I didn't care cause I loved her. She would not once offer to pay for anything or be so much happy thst I was trying to be her hero and save her. We fought all the time cause she would Not be Intimite with me or say she would love me or be affectionate. Be so Cold and nasty and we would literally be driving somewhere 30 min to get there and 30 min back, and she would not make any conversation or talk. It would Be so quiet and uncomfortable. We fought constantly cause I wanted what we had in the beginning and me asking for it and pushing her she would pull back And be angry. I can't leave I don't know why. I get sad when I feel I have lost her for good.
Heart..PLS STAHP Posted July 10, 2016 Posted July 10, 2016 I feel you. I am the same. Even though I had a couple of girlfriends they all left me. 2 of them cheated on me, the third just left out of the blue. These are the ones I actually had really strong love for. The others I don't count because I didn't care as much. All that leaving seems to have left a hole in me that I can't fill. No matter what they do and how they make me feel (besides cheating) breaks me. I feel so emotionally depressed and down I try to set my mind to something else but it constantly comes back to this. The truth is you will always have to fight your demons. I realize you wish to start a family and don't get me wrong I always longed for one - a wife and a child (or two) that we love each other immensely and just be together no matter what. However that girl doesn't sound to me that she has any real feelings for you. I think she is just using you paying bills and stuff. I realize she may not have money or may be feeling down that she can't help you out with the bills so that is heavy for her to bear but regardless when you said she doesn't talk in the car for 30 minutes or show you the affection you need that's a red flag for me. Understand that you are not here on this earth to heal the entire world. You want to be together, to help her out, but who's gonna help you? You need to find that person and you won't be able to if you are sticking with someone else that just slams your feelings to the ground. Don't do the same mistake I did. Even though my relationship was completely opposite to yours and I received attention and love from her ultimately at the end it was me who took the entire blame, sadness and mourns for the loss still. End it. Find your happiness. 1
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