ElsieA Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 Ok so here it goes , My boyfriend of 2 years just broke up with about a month ago. Even if I was thinking about doing the same, I have to admit it hurts like hell. I have to tell you that in those 2 years I did everything like EVERYTHING to make this relationship work. For example, not going out in clubs anymore, cause we all know that this is the worse for a relationship, to doing everything at home. I cooked all his meal preps for work all the time, did his laundry - washed his hockey and baseball clothes, made him diner every night. I would buy him little gifts (nothing expensive) telling him how he meant the world to me and how much I was happy to share my life with him and etc. So in other world he was being treated like a king with a gf that did everything in her possible way to make him the happiest guy on earth . Now that I think of it, after a while he took all this for granted. BUT one day out of the bleu he decided that he did not want all that anymore and left me, took all his belonging and left, to come back not even 2 days later to tell me how sorry he was how much he loved me and was so lucky to have me in his life and wanted me back. So of course I did what I probably should of not have done and took him back in a heartbeat . It went well for weeks even months. We went on trips together and had a lot of fun . But inside I was still hurting always scared he would run out of my life once again and I would get hurt all over again. Guess what my gut feeling was right …. yep it happened again he has now been gone for about a month now. The main reason this time for his departure is that he was applying for a new job and did not have time to think about a relationship and was stressed about the new job and wanted to be alone. So he left AGAIN. So here is the sad and difficult part of all this for me to understand is how can it seem so easy and simple for him to move on ? After all I did for him, and how much he was loved, how can I be so easy to forget ? Sometimes I tell myself that I did probably too much ? Always trying to please him, always doing stuff for him . But each time I would ask him to do something for me or just to show me in a way that he was grateful for what we had and it sounded impossible to him. I would sometimes ask him if he was happy, if he was ok, if he did really love me, cause he would never do anything to show it except for texting me every morning saying " good morning chérie". So when we had these discussion and between his eye rolling, I would say why don’t you try and show it to me sometimes ? He would replied .. " like how "? I don’t know what to do ? like come on it's impossible I'm not stupid. I would then suggest things like going for walk, hiking, go to the movies, but when we actually did some of these thing it was always an effort to him and he would not talk during the walk and be in a hurry to get back home to his TV/sports. Afterwards, I would feel bad and insecure . An example of another effort I did to find something we can do together, I bought some roller blades thinking he would like that because he love hockey..no you guessed it…he said this is not in my comfort zone. Also, every time we are in public we cannot talk loudly and need to be very quiet and he keeps telling me to shssss when I speak. We can never speak about the future, when I try he would change the subject. Another annoying thing is every time I tried to have a serious discussion he would roll his eyes and avoid the topic. The only thing that he would love to do is play hockey, play baseball, watch sports and play on his playstation, I can honestly say that is the only time I could tell he was exited and really happy . Made me feel so hurt inside that at the end, I was myself thinking of leaving, but could just not make the move cause a part of me still believed in us . So when he left he said I’m sorry I wish things could have ended up differently but I have no time for someone in my life .. I have been texting him from day one telling him I miss him, I miss us, and all that stuff you know the rest . At first, I got msg back saying "sorry like I said I have no more time for that " then a week went by and he told me that he misses everything, that he misses me and all that BUT he still has no time for me . After that the text continued and he said that he could not imagine himself sleeping with another woman and that he dreams about me all the time and that he could not think or even consider seeing someone else . He leads me on and when I come around the next day or a few days later he tells all the same stuff that he wants no contact with me and has no time to talk. Likeeeeeeeee wtf ? I’m so confuse . So today I started no contact with him and I feel terrible all I can do is think and think that he will forget me cause will no longer me talking . I need advice I need to try to understand cause right now I’m so lost .
confusedone19 Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 Not in the best place to give advice going through my own heartache and doing NC He sounds like my guy be careful he might just be keeping you there as a plan b ur doing the right thing with NC and I know how hard it is it is killing me 2
bummer Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 Sorry for your heartache. It's obvious from your description of your relationship he was pulling away awhile ago. The lack of any romance, coldness of dates, rolling eyes, and ignoring future talk describes any man who lost his attraction. Yes he still dreams of you, yes he regrets his choice. BUT, not enough to be with you again. This is all guilt soothing validation and trying to ease his discomfort. Ignore his comments. Good luck with NC. You deserve a partner, 50/50 an nothing else. 2
Author ElsieA Posted July 7, 2016 Author Posted July 7, 2016 he was like this that since day one . I think he is the type that will grow old all by himself cause he can't do anything for anybody not even his own parents . How sad is that ? 1
Author ElsieA Posted July 7, 2016 Author Posted July 7, 2016 Not in the best place to give advice going through my own heartache and doing NC He sounds like my guy be careful he might just be keeping you there as a plan b ur doing the right thing with NC and I know how hard it is it is killing me I feel your pain like bummer said we deserve alot more than that !
bummer Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 he was like this that since day one . I think he is the type that will grow old all by himself cause he can't do anything for anybody not even his own parents . How sad is that ? Wonderful, poorly-adjusted man child. You deserve much better. Work on your boundaries and make sure you aren't giving everything to someone who isn't giving it right back. 3
adelfue Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 Hi After a two year relationship on May 27 , I was also dumped... due to a lot of differences and insecurities in our relationship I was sooo devastated I didn't know what to do to convince he didn't have to leave... he dumped me 3 days before my 25th birthday... hahaha you can imagine how much my birthday sucked but that's because I wanted it to suck... I begged him sooo much , I went no contact on him 3 weeks and around two weeks ago I talked to him and he told me he was done that he cared for me and that was love but not the one that I wanted and well just that I wasn't what he was looking for anymore , you can imagine all the nasty anxiety attacks I got and crazy thoughts that went through my mind I was going crazy butttttt I think what im trying to say is that once you change your mind set once you understand that self LOVE is the answer to everything every suffering and question regarding the relationship you have gets answered , he might not be available to be in a relationship right now but that does not mean that in the future he wont , and this are not words of HOPE because you need to let go of hope and of the person in order for them to come back no amount of begging or talking or telling them you miss them will make them come back. NO CONTACT is great for you to heal for you to understand that this person is your addiction at the moment and any time you talk to that person and that person rejects you , you will have an allergic reaction such as worry , anxiety , depression. If you truly love yourself or if you are on the process of learning to do so please don't hurt yourself chasing this man , if he is the guy for you have faith in the future but right now you need to HEAL because you seem hurt and no amount of begging or talking will bring that old relationship back , and why would you want it , wouldn't you like to heal and be better and then start a new relationship if the attraction brings you guys back together? I am wishing you the best through your journey we are strong and a positive attitude and a big dose of self love can get us through everything!! feel free to reach me if you ever need to talk stay positive life has great this for us!!! 2
MissBee Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 (edited) Read a site called Baggage Reclaim, it's very helpful! The author of that blog even has a book about the No Contact Rule which I found extremely valuable, as it explains the entire logic of this, discusses the rollercoaster of emotions you will feel, practical things to do, traps not to fall in etc...it will really help to strengthen you and believe me, you need the strength because this 'relationship' is not worth it and you need to find the courage to keep your resolve to walk away, or rather, KEEP ON WALKING and NEVER LOOK BACK! You listed ALL the horrible ways in which this was not a mutual, loving, supportive relationship. I got angry reading all that stuff. You basically had a man you did way too much stuff for, while he did little to nothing for you and you had to beg for his gratitude and affection, he walked out on you twice, you had to live in fear that he would walk out, he refused to act like he had any sense....I mean...it's a laundry list of horrors. On the site, she also talks about emotionally unavailable men/assclowns and fall back girls (women who put up with these men and who are basically their doormats and back up plan, waiting hand on foot for these losers to love them because they don't love themselves enough), that may also give you some insight into your own self worth and why you want love from a man who made every effort to avoid this. Even if he came back, why would you want him? So you can continue washing, cooking, cleaning, buying stuff for him and then begging him to listen to you as he shushes you, actively avoids discussions of the future and says he is clueless about how to be a mutual and loving partner? For what? One way to heal in NC is to focus on your own problems and not the other person. You can't control him and can't make him love or respect you...so it's best to focus on why in the first place you were with or want someone who basically added little real value to your life. That path of figuring it out will be eye-opening and even painful, but will keep you busy, and will also help you not to simply "heal" and then end up with another dude just like this. You already wasted 2 years with this clown, you can't get it back, but you can REFUSE to waste anymore time with him and NC is the start of that. Block and delete and just keep writing down all the things he didn't do and you didn't like and be angry and hurt and upset and grieve it and that will keep you in reality instead of wishing for a man that likely doesn't exist or a relationship that wasn't much to wish for. Edited July 7, 2016 by MissBee 1
JewelD Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 No contact is hard, but it's the best thing! He's sending you texts leading you on because he's a pos and wants your attention. Not you, just your attention. He knows he hurt you and instead of allowing you to heal, he's trying to use you in your vulnerable state to make HIM feel better. I had a horrible breakup with my bf of 3 years in April of 2015. He was similar to your ex, very self absorbed. It was back and forth until I moved on to a new relationship. He didn't want me to be happy with someone else, so he lead me astray from my new partner by promising to change and be a better man and pick out a ring for me and how he wanted me to have his kids. And like a fool, I went back to him. I kid you not, about 3 weeks later, he was like "I don't know if I see a future for us". Barged into my new relationship just to get me back and dump me again because he didn't want me to be happy. I was devastated. and I had to spend the whole summer alone going through a breakup. I quit my part time job bc I was too depressed to go, I didn't sleep or eat. and occasionally he would pop back up the first month or so to tell me dumb things. and I latched onto it bc I was lonely. The bastard even told me he had cancer so I'd feel sorry for him. He had bleeding, hadn't seen a doctor ad yet diagnosed himself with cancer (obviously, he didn't have it, just wanted attention). Then eventually he went ghost on me entirely. Wouldn't answer my calls or texts. I legit wanted to die most days. Worst/Best summer ever. I moped for a long time, but I started going to the gym, eating healthy, doing things out of my comfort zone, like hikes and online dating (OLD is a lil complicated after a breakup though, sometimes it can make things worse) and meditating and just overall focusing on making myself a better person. Write a list of every mean and nasty thing he did/said to you and post it somewhere you will see it every morning. Not to bring up pain, but to remind you why you DO NOT want to talk to him. Keep a journal and write your feelings down everyday, whenever you feel anxious or sad. If you feel like crying, do it and get it all out. I know it doesn't seem like it, but it will get better! Not that you should care, but trust me, he won't forget you. My ex tried to contact me about 3 mos after NC. I picked up, realized it was him and hung up in his face. He called back several times and I didn't pick up. He sent texts asking how I was doing, I did not respond. He texted me again 3 months later around Thanksgiving and I ignored him. Then he tried to call and text about a month or two ago. He texted "hey! just seeing how things were going with you. so much has happened, it blows my mind!" <<< This is the cry for attention, the "I want you to want to talk to me". I don't have his number saved, but I didn't block it because I love ignoring him. It's a special feeling to regain your power and be able to say no to the person who said no to you. But getting over him is the best thing for you. Soon, that sadness will turn into anger. and that anger will turn into mild annoyance. and then you'll forget him most of the time until someone brings him up. and by then, you'll be so much stronger! 1
Author ElsieA Posted July 8, 2016 Author Posted July 8, 2016 Read a site called Baggage Reclaim, it's very helpful! The author of that blog even has a book about the No Contact Rule which I found extremely valuable, as it explains the entire logic of this, discusses the rollercoaster of emotions you will feel, practical things to do, traps not to fall in etc...it will really help to strengthen you and believe me, you need the strength because this 'relationship' is not worth it and you need to find the courage to keep your resolve to walk away, or rather, KEEP ON WALKING and NEVER LOOK BACK! You listed ALL the horrible ways in which this was not a mutual, loving, supportive relationship. I got angry reading all that stuff. You basically had a man you did way too much stuff for, while he did little to nothing for you and you had to beg for his gratitude and affection, he walked out on you twice, you had to live in fear that he would walk out, he refused to act like he had any sense....I mean...it's a laundry list of horrors. On the site, she also talks about emotionally unavailable men/assclowns and fall back girls (women who put up with these men and who are basically their doormats and back up plan, waiting hand on foot for these losers to love them because they don't love themselves enough), that may also give you some insight into your own self worth and why you want love from a man who made every effort to avoid this. Even if he came back, why would you want him? So you can continue washing, cooking, cleaning, buying stuff for him and then begging him to listen to you as he shushes you, actively avoids discussions of the future and says he is clueless about how to be a mutual and loving partner? For what? One way to heal in NC is to focus on your own problems and not the other person. You can't control him and can't make him love or respect you...so it's best to focus on why in the first place you were with or want someone who basically added little real value to your life. That path of figuring it out will be eye-opening and even painful, but will keep you busy, and will also help you not to simply "heal" and then end up with another dude just like this. You already wasted 2 years with this clown, you can't get it back, but you can REFUSE to waste anymore time with him and NC is the start of that. Block and delete and just keep writing down all the things he didn't do and you didn't like and be angry and hurt and upset and grieve it and that will keep you in reality instead of wishing for a man that likely doesn't exist or a relationship that wasn't much to wish for. thx alot for taking the time to write back to me it felt really good to read all at and even if it is hard i know that you are right . I guess with NC i will start feeling better i have to stop thinking about what he's thinking cause im driving myself crazy . The worse part is that he is probably doing just fine and im here hurt as hell . But i do believe in karma and it always catches you back one day not that i wish him harm but i just wish i will have the chance one day to turn him down and say NO this time im NOT taking you back .
Author ElsieA Posted July 8, 2016 Author Posted July 8, 2016 No contact is hard, but it's the best thing! He's sending you texts leading you on because he's a pos and wants your attention. Not you, just your attention. He knows he hurt you and instead of allowing you to heal, he's trying to use you in your vulnerable state to make HIM feel better. I had a horrible breakup with my bf of 3 years in April of 2015. He was similar to your ex, very self absorbed. It was back and forth until I moved on to a new relationship. He didn't want me to be happy with someone else, so he lead me astray from my new partner by promising to change and be a better man and pick out a ring for me and how he wanted me to have his kids. And like a fool, I went back to him. I kid you not, about 3 weeks later, he was like "I don't know if I see a future for us". Barged into my new relationship just to get me back and dump me again because he didn't want me to be happy. I was devastated. and I had to spend the whole summer alone going through a breakup. I quit my part time job bc I was too depressed to go, I didn't sleep or eat. and occasionally he would pop back up the first month or so to tell me dumb things. and I latched onto it bc I was lonely. The bastard even told me he had cancer so I'd feel sorry for him. He had bleeding, hadn't seen a doctor ad yet diagnosed himself with cancer (obviously, he didn't have it, just wanted attention). Then eventually he went ghost on me entirely. Wouldn't answer my calls or texts. I legit wanted to die most days. Worst/Best summer ever. I moped for a long time, but I started going to the gym, eating healthy, doing things out of my comfort zone, like hikes and online dating (OLD is a lil complicated after a breakup though, sometimes it can make things worse) and meditating and just overall focusing on making myself a better person. Write a list of every mean and nasty thing he did/said to you and post it somewhere you will see it every morning. Not to bring up pain, but to remind you why you DO NOT want to talk to him. Keep a journal and write your feelings down everyday, whenever you feel anxious or sad. If you feel like crying, do it and get it all out. I know it doesn't seem like it, but it will get better! Not that you should care, but trust me, he won't forget you. My ex tried to contact me about 3 mos after NC. I picked up, realized it was him and hung up in his face. He called back several times and I didn't pick up. He sent texts asking how I was doing, I did not respond. He texted me again 3 months later around Thanksgiving and I ignored him. Then he tried to call and text about a month or two ago. He texted "hey! just seeing how things were going with you. so much has happened, it blows my mind!" <<< This is the cry for attention, the "I want you to want to talk to me". I don't have his number saved, but I didn't block it because I love ignoring him. It's a special feeling to regain your power and be able to say no to the person who said no to you. But getting over him is the best thing for you. Soon, that sadness will turn into anger. and that anger will turn into mild annoyance. and then you'll forget him most of the time until someone brings him up. and by then, you'll be so much stronger! Oh wow i feel for you right now . How can they be so heartless? like they really dont give a f*** about hurting us and about are feelings . And im pretty sure just like me you were amazing to him . That is the part that hurts the most on my side .. Like l know im far from beeing perfect but if im sure about one thing i was good to him for 2 years and would of done ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING to make him happy . And i did say I cause i was the only one trying . He would tell me he loves me but no actions .. And in my book action speaks louder than words .
Author ElsieA Posted July 8, 2016 Author Posted July 8, 2016 Thx for your reply means the world to me . Yes i know that NC is the best way to get through all this . Im trying my best to NOT contact him cause all it does is bring me back to square one . He will say that yes he misses me and everything we had but has no time for me ..I can't handle reading thoes text anymore there heartbreaking. Like you said we are strong and we can do this !
Author ElsieA Posted July 8, 2016 Author Posted July 8, 2016 No contact is hard, but it's the best thing! He's sending you texts leading you on because he's a pos and wants your attention. Not you, just your attention. He knows he hurt you and instead of allowing you to heal, he's trying to use you in your vulnerable state to make HIM feel better. I had a horrible breakup with my bf of 3 years in April of 2015. He was similar to your ex, very self absorbed. It was back and forth until I moved on to a new relationship. He didn't want me to be happy with someone else, so he lead me astray from my new partner by promising to change and be a better man and pick out a ring for me and how he wanted me to have his kids. And like a fool, I went back to him. I kid you not, about 3 weeks later, he was like "I don't know if I see a future for us". Barged into my new relationship just to get me back and dump me again because he didn't want me to be happy. I was devastated. and I had to spend the whole summer alone going through a breakup. I quit my part time job bc I was too depressed to go, I didn't sleep or eat. and occasionally he would pop back up the first month or so to tell me dumb things. and I latched onto it bc I was lonely. The bastard even told me he had cancer so I'd feel sorry for him. He had bleeding, hadn't seen a doctor ad yet diagnosed himself with cancer (obviously, he didn't have it, just wanted attention). Then eventually he went ghost on me entirely. Wouldn't answer my calls or texts. I legit wanted to die most days. Worst/Best summer ever. I moped for a long time, but I started going to the gym, eating healthy, doing things out of my comfort zone, like hikes and online dating (OLD is a lil complicated after a breakup though, sometimes it can make things worse) and meditating and just overall focusing on making myself a better person. Write a list of every mean and nasty thing he did/said to you and post it somewhere you will see it every morning. Not to bring up pain, but to remind you why you DO NOT want to talk to him. Keep a journal and write your feelings down everyday, whenever you feel anxious or sad. If you feel like crying, do it and get it all out. I know it doesn't seem like it, but it will get better! Not that you should care, but trust me, he won't forget you. My ex tried to contact me about 3 mos after NC. I picked up, realized it was him and hung up in his face. He called back several times and I didn't pick up. He sent texts asking how I was doing, I did not respond. He texted me again 3 months later around Thanksgiving and I ignored him. Then he tried to call and text about a month or two ago. He texted "hey! just seeing how things were going with you. so much has happened, it blows my mind!" <<< This is the cry for attention, the "I want you to want to talk to me". I don't have his number saved, but I didn't block it because I love ignoring him. It's a special feeling to regain your power and be able to say no to the person who said no to you. But getting over him is the best thing for you. Soon, that sadness will turn into anger. and that anger will turn into mild annoyance. and then you'll forget him most of the time until someone brings him up. and by then, you'll be so much stronger! Join Date: Jul 2016 Posts: 6 Thx for your reply means the world to me . Yes i know that NC is the best way to get through all this . Im trying my best to NOT contact him cause all it does is bring me back to square one . He will say that yes he misses me and everything we had but has no time for me ..I can't handle reading thoes text anymore there heartbreaking. Like you said we are strong and we can do this !
Author ElsieA Posted July 8, 2016 Author Posted July 8, 2016 Today is so hard .. Any tips and tricks to stay NC ??
PegNosePete Posted July 8, 2016 Posted July 8, 2016 Negative reinforcement. Whenever you feel the urge to break NC, slap yourself. Then eventually your brain will associate wanting to break NC with pain. 1
Author ElsieA Posted July 8, 2016 Author Posted July 8, 2016 No contact is hard, but it's the best thing! He's sending you texts leading you on because he's a pos and wants your attention. Not you, just your attention. He knows he hurt you and instead of allowing you to heal, he's trying to use you in your vulnerable state to make HIM feel better. I had a horrible breakup with my bf of 3 years in April of 2015. He was similar to your ex, very self absorbed. It was back and forth until I moved on to a new relationship. He didn't want me to be happy with someone else, so he lead me astray from my new partner by promising to change and be a better man and pick out a ring for me and how he wanted me to have his kids. And like a fool, I went back to him. I kid you not, about 3 weeks later, he was like "I don't know if I see a future for us". Barged into my new relationship just to get me back and dump me again because he didn't want me to be happy. I was devastated. and I had to spend the whole summer alone going through a breakup. I quit my part time job bc I was too depressed to go, I didn't sleep or eat. and occasionally he would pop back up the first month or so to tell me dumb things. and I latched onto it bc I was lonely. The bastard even told me he had cancer so I'd feel sorry for him. He had bleeding, hadn't seen a doctor ad yet diagnosed himself with cancer (obviously, he didn't have it, just wanted attention). Then eventually he went ghost on me entirely. Wouldn't answer my calls or texts. I legit wanted to die most days. Worst/Best summer ever. I moped for a long time, but I started going to the gym, eating healthy, doing things out of my comfort zone, like hikes and online dating (OLD is a lil complicated after a breakup though, sometimes it can make things worse) and meditating and just overall focusing on making myself a better person. Write a list of every mean and nasty thing he did/said to you and post it somewhere you will see it every morning. Not to bring up pain, but to remind you why you DO NOT want to talk to him. Keep a journal and write your feelings down everyday, whenever you feel anxious or sad. If you feel like crying, do it and get it all out. I know it doesn't seem like it, but it will get better! Not that you should care, but trust me, he won't forget you. My ex tried to contact me about 3 mos after NC. I picked up, realized it was him and hung up in his face. He called back several times and I didn't pick up. He sent texts asking how I was doing, I did not respond. He texted me again 3 months later around Thanksgiving and I ignored him. Then he tried to call and text about a month or two ago. He texted "hey! just seeing how things were going with you. so much has happened, it blows my mind!" <<< This is the cry for attention, the "I want you to want to talk to me". I don't have his number saved, but I didn't block it because I love ignoring him. It's a special feeling to regain your power and be able to say no to the person who said no to you. But getting over him is the best thing for you. Soon, that sadness will turn into anger. and that anger will turn into mild annoyance. and then you'll forget him most of the time until someone brings him up. and by then, you'll be so much stronger! I know i dont want to get back with him cause i was not happy anymore always insecure asking myself so many questions .. But i so wish that one day he will realize what he lost . It hurts inside to feel that he is probably doing fine while im here hurting as hell . How can someone you have been so good to be so heartless like not even once he texted me to ask how i was doing if i was ok .. It was always me doing it .
Densel Posted July 8, 2016 Posted July 8, 2016 Well for over 7mths post break up, my ex has never once ask how am I too. U have to stop contacting him. Write here to vent. 1
Author ElsieA Posted July 8, 2016 Author Posted July 8, 2016 Well for over 7mths post break up, my ex has never once ask how am I too. U have to stop contacting him. Write here to vent. I think it is so selfish of them . Like how can you stop caring so fast . I have been good to him always made him feel secure always showing him i loved him doing everything for him and that is what i get in return ! Not even a little " how are you doing" My birthday is coming up next weekend and i honestly hope he does not send me a text wishing me happy birthday cause i really dont feel like sending him one on his birthday that is like 3 days after mine . Im so hurt and mad at all this situation im going crazy.
NIGHT1985 Posted July 8, 2016 Posted July 8, 2016 Well for over 7mths post break up, my ex has never once ask how am I too. U have to stop contacting him. Write here to vent. Yep. I tried being friends with my ex and just cut it off this week. She was hurt by my decision, but I've noticed the conversations were one sided and only took place when she wasn't hanging with her new guy, it just made me feel sick. Wasn't healthy 1
Author ElsieA Posted July 8, 2016 Author Posted July 8, 2016 Yep. I tried being friends with my ex and just cut it off this week. She was hurt by my decision, but I've noticed the conversations were one sided and only took place when she wasn't hanging with her new guy, it just made me feel sick. Wasn't healthy Wow i can just imagine . Like she was trying to keep you there .. Not looking foward at all to the day that my ex will be with someone else just to think about it i feel sick to my stomach:(
NIGHT1985 Posted July 8, 2016 Posted July 8, 2016 Wow i can just imagine . Like she was trying to keep you there .. Not looking foward at all to the day that my ex will be with someone else just to think about it i feel sick to my stomach:( Well, I've been in a dark place and felt like I needed contact with her. So I told her I could stay friends with her and not break boundaries(dumb). But she started telling me weird things. Like she hated hearing me talking about going on dates, and she wanted us to go to church together as friends, but she couldn't if I brought another girl, because it would be too hard. I took these comments as mixed signals and tried to press forward, she got angry and said I was breaking boundaries. Such a effin mess that has left me confused, more heartbroken, and completely loss my self worth.
Author ElsieA Posted July 8, 2016 Author Posted July 8, 2016 Well, I've been in a dark place and felt like I needed contact with her. So I told her I could stay friends with her and not break boundaries(dumb). But she started telling me weird things. Like she hated hearing me talking about going on dates, and she wanted us to go to church together as friends, but she couldn't if I brought another girl, because it would be too hard. I took these comments as mixed signals and tried to press forward, she got angry and said I was breaking boundaries. Such a effin mess that has left me confused, more heartbroken, and completely loss my self worth. she is playing with your head , she is aloud to date someone but your not ? she doesn't want to be with you but she doesn't want you to be with somebody else either . I know it is not easy i miss my ex bf alot but trust me just go NC on her the faster you start NC the faster you will feel better . She just wants you to stay there "in case" it dosent work out with the other guy !!! Dont you think you are much more worthed than that ? Im 100% sure that you are .
NIGHT1985 Posted July 8, 2016 Posted July 8, 2016 It was more along the lines of she wanted me to move on, but didn't want to see it or hear about it. And yea we both cut off contact. 1
Densel Posted July 8, 2016 Posted July 8, 2016 I think it is so selfish of them . Like how can you stop caring so fast . I have been good to him always made him feel secure always showing him i loved him doing everything for him and that is what i get in return ! Not even a little " how are you doing" My birthday is coming up next weekend and i honestly hope he does not send me a text wishing me happy birthday cause i really dont feel like sending him one on his birthday that is like 3 days after mine . Im so hurt and mad at all this situation im going crazy. I feel you. My birthday is in 3 days. I feel uncomfortable for the past few days. I feel sad that I am not gonna spend it with the one I love. I think getting a birthday text or not will not make a difference to my mood. Breadcrumbs will always be Breadcrumbs. If you do receive a text from him, that does not mean you need to send him one too. You do what's best for yourself.
Author ElsieA Posted July 8, 2016 Author Posted July 8, 2016 I feel you. My birthday is in 3 days. I feel uncomfortable for the past few days. I feel sad that I am not gonna spend it with the one I love. I think getting a birthday text or not will not make a difference to my mood. Breadcrumbs will always be Breadcrumbs. If you do receive a text from him, that does not mean you need to send him one too. You do what's best for yourself. I feel for you 2 , we had plans for are birthdays but not anymore . And your right breadcrumbs we dont need that right now or never should i say !!!! It is so hard to let go .. Even when you know that it was probably the best decision:( I just cant imagine him with another woman i feel really sick to my stomach when i do . I just hope that one day he will realize what he gave up on im not perfect but i sure dint deserve all that .
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