allboys111 Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 So I met him when I was 21 and he was 27 (last year). We went on a date and didn't think much of it because I was seeing other people (he was seeing other people as well). The first date was okay then he calls me on my way home to come over the next, which I did. Fast forward to two weeks, he said he just wanted to be ****buddies and I agreed. I didn't care. The guy is a doctor and very good looking so I didn't think that I was pretty enough for him to just stop seeing other people. I was having sex with two other guys which I later told him about. He was not happy even though he had sex with 5 different girls while we were **** buddies. Still i didn't care. It was before our relationship and didn't expect for him to just have sex with me. At that time, he said not to have sex with 2 guys on the same day.. Which I almost did with him but didn't. Fast forward to now, he found out about this and was furious. He calls me disgusting and was crying like i cheated on him. He also knows that I had a threesome waaay before I met him and I was boastful about it. I was only boastful because I wanted to seem like I was fun. Up until this day he would not stop making me feel bad about it. I also said the guy that i had a threesome with was gorgeous and has a bigger dick. Which is not true. I was trying to make him jealous and I'm a dumb ass for saying that.. I also have that guy on my instagram and my bf has asked me if thats the guy. I kept saying no because I know he would be jealous and would constantly stalk him. He now find out that that is the guy and he is pissed off at me for lying. So, okay, I completely understand where he is coming from. He now demands that we have a threesome. Which I agreed to now because of everything i said. Seeing how it has affected him. our whole relationship since may has just been all about the threesome.. We cant find a girl and hes annoyed because the other guy had it easy with me. He thinks I like the guy but i honestly dont... I am now lazy and will start bullet points from here - I moved in with him after 2 months. I was only supposed to stay there for a month until I moved in at the new condo but he said that we should just live together. I pay 600 rent and he pays 1000. Which im fine with. But we eat out everyday because we live dt and he doesnt have the time to cook. I'm not a good cook. I tried to cook before but he was very judgmental. So i just dont. Im too afraid of what he would think - he made himself breakfast and didnt bother to ask me if i wanted any. This is a thing, He never asks me if i wanted any food. Im very tiny 5'3 100lbs. I could barely eat anything. I just wanted the gesture. - on his birthday he was in a washroom with 2 other guys and a girl and was about to do a line of coke on the girls boobs in the bathroom. Over heard because I needed the washroom. I freaked out and banged on the door and threw my beer on the floor. I was also high on MDMA at that time. Tried to break up with him after is birthday weekend but asked for a second chance. So i said ok. - He was talking to the girl he liked (also had sex) before me about our relationship for months...... the only reason they didn't work was because she had to go back home for about a month and he said that they can't just pick up where they left off when she asked. - he expects me to just book off days when he has days off. He also expects me to go on every vacation he goes to. Roughly 4 times a year. I only make $40,000 and pay for myself.. he pays some of my portion but no more than $300 And i call in sick whenever he has a day off. - He used to flirt A LOT with girls. He likes the attention which stopped just recently. - both of our friends dont like us for each other - We spend all our free time together (which i do enjoy and so does he) - i have put much more effort on his birthday and valentines day than he did.. I know im not supposed to compare but WTF. - on my sisters birthday he would much rather hangout with his buddies than go hang out with my sister with me. - hes very entitled. I am no angel. I yell at him A LOT. I'm not sure if I'm making the right decision to break up.
bummer Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 Jealousy and resentment are the cornerstones to building yourself a wonderful wall of youthful insecurities. Once your wall is tall enough, you won't see this delicious doctor for the good in him or the bad when he's blowing lines off boobies. you'll find more unhealthy coping mechanisms. You or him will either cheat or admit to some episode earlier. Want to see how deep this rabbit hole goes? Alternatively, you being the young adult you are, you can start pulling away now. Save some money and find your own place and gtfo. Next time you'll be better and so will the next guy.
PegNosePete Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 Wow, reading that was like watching a train wreck in slow motion. Why are you even with this guy? Apart from he's a doctor (so presumably not short of a quid or two) and good looking? Those don't sound like the cornerstones of quality relationship to me. I think you both need to move on. You're quite clearly not a good match and you've both treated each other so badly that you can't possibly recover now. 3
stillafool Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 I agree with your friends that you are definitely not right for each other. Too much drama, sex and drugs. 1
Redhead14 Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 So I met him when I was 21 and he was 27 (last year). We went on a date and didn't think much of it because I was seeing other people (he was seeing other people as well). The first date was okay then he calls me on my way home to come over the next, which I did. Fast forward to two weeks, he said he just wanted to be ****buddies and I agreed. I didn't care. The guy is a doctor and very good looking so I didn't think that I was pretty enough for him to just stop seeing other people. I was having sex with two other guys which I later told him about. He was not happy even though he had sex with 5 different girls while we were **** buddies. Still i didn't care. It was before our relationship and didn't expect for him to just have sex with me. At that time, he said not to have sex with 2 guys on the same day.. Which I almost did with him but didn't. Fast forward to now, he found out about this and was furious. He calls me disgusting and was crying like i cheated on him. He also knows that I had a threesome waaay before I met him and I was boastful about it. I was only boastful because I wanted to seem like I was fun. Up until this day he would not stop making me feel bad about it. I also said the guy that i had a threesome with was gorgeous and has a bigger dick. Which is not true. I was trying to make him jealous and I'm a dumb ass for saying that.. I also have that guy on my instagram and my bf has asked me if thats the guy. I kept saying no because I know he would be jealous and would constantly stalk him. He now find out that that is the guy and he is pissed off at me for lying. So, okay, I completely understand where he is coming from. He now demands that we have a threesome. Which I agreed to now because of everything i said. Seeing how it has affected him. our whole relationship since may has just been all about the threesome.. We cant find a girl and hes annoyed because the other guy had it easy with me. He thinks I like the guy but i honestly dont... I am now lazy and will start bullet points from here - I moved in with him after 2 months. I was only supposed to stay there for a month until I moved in at the new condo but he said that we should just live together. I pay 600 rent and he pays 1000. Which im fine with. But we eat out everyday because we live dt and he doesnt have the time to cook. I'm not a good cook. I tried to cook before but he was very judgmental. So i just dont. Im too afraid of what he would think - he made himself breakfast and didnt bother to ask me if i wanted any. This is a thing, He never asks me if i wanted any food. Im very tiny 5'3 100lbs. I could barely eat anything. I just wanted the gesture. - on his birthday he was in a washroom with 2 other guys and a girl and was about to do a line of coke on the girls boobs in the bathroom. Over heard because I needed the washroom. I freaked out and banged on the door and threw my beer on the floor. I was also high on MDMA at that time. Tried to break up with him after is birthday weekend but asked for a second chance. So i said ok. - He was talking to the girl he liked (also had sex) before me about our relationship for months...... the only reason they didn't work was because she had to go back home for about a month and he said that they can't just pick up where they left off when she asked. - he expects me to just book off days when he has days off. He also expects me to go on every vacation he goes to. Roughly 4 times a year. I only make $40,000 and pay for myself.. he pays some of my portion but no more than $300 And i call in sick whenever he has a day off. - He used to flirt A LOT with girls. He likes the attention which stopped just recently. - both of our friends dont like us for each other - We spend all our free time together (which i do enjoy and so does he) - i have put much more effort on his birthday and valentines day than he did.. I know im not supposed to compare but WTF. - on my sisters birthday he would much rather hangout with his buddies than go hang out with my sister with me. - hes very entitled. I am no angel. I yell at him A LOT. I'm not sure if I'm making the right decision to break up. he said he just wanted to be ****buddies and I agreed. -- F**k buddies don't break up, they just go their separate ways . . . He just wants to be F buddies and that's how he's treating you . . . as evidenced by the statements highlighted below: he made himself breakfast and didnt bother to ask me if i wanted any. This is a thing, He never asks me if i wanted any food he was in a washroom with 2 other guys and a girl and was about to do a line of coke on the girls boobs he expects me to just book off days when he has days off i have put much more effort on his birthday and valentines day than he did.. I know im not supposed to compare but WTF. rather hangout with his buddies than go hang out with my sister with me. hes very entitled. Breaking up implies that there was an actual, connected relationship. F buddies, don't have that. However, it's usually the woman who starts wanting and expecting more and then starts to treat the arrangement like a relationship -- I moved in with him after 2 months -- how convenient for him -- A live in F buddy???? I am no angel. -- This may be true, however, what's worse is you are allowing yourself to be used. Get real with yourself and think about your future and have some goals for yourself. If you are hoping to have a relationship with someone in the future, starting raising the bar for yourself and don't accept "arrangements" with people just because they are doctors, or are cute, etc. and then start having expectations for more especially when they've told you upfront what they want. 2
Author allboys111 Posted July 7, 2016 Author Posted July 7, 2016 Sorry I should've been clear... We are official after 4 months of being **** buddies******
Redhead14 Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 Sorry I should've been clear... We are official after 4 months of being **** buddies****** We are official after 4 months of being **** buddies****** -- No, you're not. He's not treating you like that. I'd say he gave you lip service -- "Ok, ok, I let her call me her boyfriend if that will shut her up and I can still have what I want." Move on, Allboys, you're wasting your youth on a doctor who does cocaine on a woman's boobs and does whatever he wants when he wants to. He's irresponsible, at best. He doesn't respect his career or women. He's a doctor who can't save himself and won't save you.
Author allboys111 Posted July 7, 2016 Author Posted July 7, 2016 oh god i suck at this. Im the one who didnt want to be in a relationship even when he asked me. Until i got drunk and asked me again. so thats that. Kinda just brushed it off since i havent been in a relationship for awhile. and when i met him, i wasnt looking for a relationship either. but youre completely right. thank you. i just want to be treated better.. and clearly hes not going to do that for me 2
bummer Posted July 7, 2016 Posted July 7, 2016 i just want to be treated better.. and clearly hes not going to do that for me Boom! Find a place and be nice for now. But when you got your things lined up, pack up, be strong, write a note or say directly exactly what you said. Dont go back under any circumstance. He doesn't respect you.
Cayemmo Posted July 18, 2016 Posted July 18, 2016 Hi There, I'm so sorry to hear how difficult things have been for you. I may be somewhat late with this response but I wanted to share a link that might be helpful in finding closure after a break-up: Closure After a Tough Breakup | Boundless Blog I wish you the best. Blessings.
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