soccorsilly Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 OK, I became casually involved with this woman a few months back, we had maybe a half dozen dates and finally slept together (I posted about her interrupting to tell me she "needed me to be watching and looking at her to know I was with her" a while back). Anyhow, we only slept together once and then for a few eeks her life became complicated with a kid issue at school, and my own life began to fill up with some of my own business issues. We had a few texts back and forth and the last message I left o her machine was that I would give her a call later that night to "catch up". Well one thing led to another and I never returned the call. It is now almost a month since then and I feel bad. But she has not called either. In hindsight this was not going anywhere--the sex was great (except for the interruption) but there were just some idiosynchrosies that drove me nuts--talked incessantly and unfortunately they tended to be the same stories she told me the week before! So, am I a cad for not calling her back? Should I call and just say that hey it is not gonna work, or let sleeping dogs lie? We never "broke up" we just sort of seemed to set like the sun.
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 Originally posted by soccorsilly So, am I a cad for not calling her back? Should I call and just say that hey it is not gonna work, or let sleeping dogs lie? We never "broke up" we just sort of seemed to set like the sun. It seems a little mean to me - I always like to give a clear signal to girls. Saves on heartbreak But it's done now. After a month she has already got the message. So unless you want to ring for another reason - lunch on a friendship basis, for example - I'd let sleeping dogs lie.
debs Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 Being a female and being one who is now actively dating, your lucky it wasn't me you had a lapse in memory to call! I know you have a conscious or you wouldn't have posted this! Since a month has past, you would add more insult to injury and just make her feel like a "convience" if you contacted her now!
alphamale Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 you did nuthin' wrong SOCCORSILLY....do nothing and say nothing. just leave it be...
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale just leave it be... Cue music: When I find myself in times of trouble, Father Alpha comes to me, whispering words of wisdom - Let it be...
Author soccorsilly Posted June 28, 2005 Author Posted June 28, 2005 The not calling was not intentional. She had been out of touch for a week or so with her daughter's issues at college and then it seemed to be my turn. Debs--your right I do have a conscious and feel bad, but the reality is also that thee was no future there and I think I will just let sleeping dogs lie----and wait for that confrontaton on a street some evening! LOL Alpha--I think you and I are very similar and might have a fun time out over a few drinks.
debs Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 I agree with all of your posts on this thread! And SC, I do know how these things can get put in the back ground of things to do lists! lol!!! SC!!! Not many women would cause a public scene by this! Unless she becomes a rabid dog when provoked?!
lindya Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 Well, it seems a bit charmless to me, but most people have at some point adopted the easy route of simply avoiding someone they don't want to see again. Whether or not you actually did something wrong here totally depends upon the kind of person you want to be. If you could re-run the situation, would you play it the same way?
alphamale Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 Originally posted by soccorsilly Alpha--I think you and I are very similar and might have a fun time out over a few drinks. I agree
lindya Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 Admit it, Soccorsilly...you made this whole post up in order to fix up a date with alphamale
alphamale Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 Originally posted by lindya Admit it, Soccorsilly...you made this whole post up in order to fix up a date with alphamale I'm strictly hetero...
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale I'm strictly hetero... And yet, I have a distant memory of you asking advice about gay bars in Detroit...
Author soccorsilly Posted June 28, 2005 Author Posted June 28, 2005 In the immortal words of Gary Coleman "Whats you talkin' bout Willis?" And for the record--43 Divorced White Male 100% Hetero
alphamale Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 Originally posted by ReluctantRomeo And yet, I have a distant memory of you asking advice about gay bars in Detroit... Let me refresh your failing memory RR. That was cause I was meeting this chick who was singing in a band playing at a gay bar.
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 28, 2005 Posted June 28, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale Let me refresh your failing memory RR. That was cause I was meeting this chick who was singing in a band playing at a gay bar. Sounds pretty contrived to me Seriously, do you still hear from the singer chick?
Rosalind Posted July 1, 2005 Posted July 1, 2005 Originally posted by ReluctantRomeo But it's done now. After a month she has already got the message. I'd let sleeping dogs lie. Word
Author soccorsilly Posted July 2, 2005 Author Posted July 2, 2005 OK, so now out of the blue, I get an IM from her and an email. Grrr--women
debs Posted July 2, 2005 Posted July 2, 2005 Ok SC so what did she have to say? You know us "inquiring" minds on LS want to know!
Rosalind Posted July 2, 2005 Posted July 2, 2005 Originally posted by soccorsilly OK, so now out of the blue, I get an IM from her and an email. Grrr--women *laughing* Let me guess...it was probably friendly, and saying she's sorry for not contacting you sooner, but it's because she's had a really busy month...and she hopes that the 2 of you will be able to get together again soon. Am I right?
Author soccorsilly Posted July 2, 2005 Author Posted July 2, 2005 Close....just a hey where have you been I haven't talked to you in ages. A cursory catch up on her life and a let's talk soon.
alphamale Posted July 2, 2005 Posted July 2, 2005 Originally posted by soccorsilly Close....just a hey where have you been I haven't talked to you in ages. A cursory catch up on her life and a let's talk soon. if your not initerested then blow her off....otherwise you'll be opening up pandora's box. and pandora can be a pretty mean bytch when she wants to be.
ReluctantRomeo Posted July 4, 2005 Posted July 4, 2005 I'd be friendly and kind, but find some way to signal that romance isn't going to work. Like telling her about a girl you're interested in. Or saying you'd love to see her again, but it won't work till after the summer holidays now. In fact, if you're still interested in friendship, you could come right out with a clear "friends only" speech. She has a right to clear signals from you.
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