ebm Posted July 2, 2016 Posted July 2, 2016 Hi I spoke to a guy on Tinder last week and ended up meeting last saturday. It ended up being five hours long and had a hug at the end of the date. On Wednesday, we met up again to go bowling, restaurant and went back to his watch a movie. It got quite late so I ended up staying at his. I told him I didn't want sex and he said I am genuinely interested, I was only expecting to go bowling today. We ended up kissing for hours. He was so passionate and I've never had anyone kiss me that much. Last night, we went to watch a movie at his because we both had long days. After a few hours, we started kissing and then I told him he kisses me too much and I need a break. After a while, we started kissing again and I said I don't want him to use me and he said that's hurtful. I said what are we? and he said is this the talk? and I said no, are we friends for now and he said yes but maybe more in the future. In the morning, he kissed me and I asked if he would like to do it again and he said yes. The only problem is that I'm not in the area for a week and I just have a gut feeling that i won't see him again. He absolutely sucks at texting and only replies to make plans. He told me that his very laidback. I find it difficult to trust people and this guy is the first I have been on a date with. At uni, I always say no to people. How do you know when a person is genuine and actually likes you for you?
Otter2569 Posted July 2, 2016 Posted July 2, 2016 Always trust your gut and take a chance! You have to hang yourself out there sometimes. What have you got to lose?
gorf Posted July 2, 2016 Posted July 2, 2016 I mean.. depends what kind of relationship you want. Its tinder, so you should know what kind of relationships come from tinder in general, on average. Second, you stay at his place right off the bat, hes pushing for sex and intimacy right away, I mean its clear what he wants... and he is hurt?? cause you did not want it?? Sounds kinda scumbaggish to me So what do you want? I would say look at the big picture as early on as you can so you dont get attached and swept away.
katiegrl Posted July 2, 2016 Posted July 2, 2016 He told you he only wants to be friends (for now maybe more later - yeah right). But it is clear he also wants sex! What does this all mean? No strings sex... friends with benefits ... Unless that is what you want too, move on. 1
kardinal3 Posted July 2, 2016 Posted July 2, 2016 Fun fact: there's no magical tell-tale sign that makes you aware of whether someone likes you or not. You just have to wait it out, and eventually get to the point where both of you are either sure or unsure. The sad reality is that some people don't know what they want right off the bat. Some will lie. Others will be honest. It seems fairly likely that him telling you he's laid back is his way of telling you "don't have any expectations of me". My advice? It's clear you like this guy, but don't put all of your energy into it, because he doesn't seem to be doing that for you. Keep dating and talking to other guys, and when you're back in town, ask this guy out again to see where you both stand. It sounds like you haven't been on Tinder long either? Tinder is an entirely new ball of wax. Most people are there are setting up dates left and right, and talking to multiple people at once. If they're normally busy outside of their regular work schedule--and dating on top of that--most will not put energy into longer texting conversations.
joseb Posted July 3, 2016 Posted July 3, 2016 If you go to a guys house to watch a movie, he is going to assume you want sex. If that was not your intention, then don't go around to "watch a movie" 1
longjohn Posted July 3, 2016 Posted July 3, 2016 If you go to a guys house to watch a movie, he is going to assume you want sex. If that was not your intention, then don't go around to "watch a movie" I had a lady ask me to her house to "watch a movie" turns out she only wanted sex too! I felt so violated and cheap but I enjoyed every second of it. OP, trust your gut. From what you've said so far as a guy I'm thinking he's trying to put you into the friends with benefits place. You'll think there'll be more there'll only be a whole lot of "Netflix and Chill". 1
ExpatInItaly Posted July 3, 2016 Posted July 3, 2016 Avoid going to a guy's house so early in the game. Let a guy show you his intentions. See if he arranges dates, not movie nights. Not yet.
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