Peachykeen85 Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 I'm a female. My close platonic male friend of 4 years knows that I'm going through a tough time right now. For the first time he's told me he loves me and that I'm a light in his life. He then asked if I want to come stay with him for a while. (He lives in a different country than I do.) He said he will pay for the ticket and everything and to seriously think about it. I took a day to think about it then said "yes". I haven't heard from him since and that was 4 days ago. I contacted him on the third day and asked if everything is ok and he still didn't answer but I see him active on Facebook. I've never gone this long without talking to him and I just don't know what to think, if our friendship is changing or if I did something wrong.
Toodaloo Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 He is over stepping his mark.. Stay at home and prepare yourself. I have a feeling he was hanging in the wings as an orbiter waiting for a chance and now you have said yes its a bit too much reality... 1
anika99 Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 You haven't given enough info on this friendship for anyone to guess what is going on with your friend but I'll take a stab at it. It sounds like when he made the offer for you to visit he wasn't really prepared for you to say yes and now that you have something is making him have second thoughts. Perhaps he made that offer impulsively because it sounded like a really good idea in the moment but now he's changed his mind. He doesn't know how to tell you so he is just avoiding you altogether.
Nowty V Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Was he an online friend or did you ever live in the same town? 1
Author Peachykeen85 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 Was he an online friend or did you ever live in the same town? Yes for 9 months then he had to leave.
Author Peachykeen85 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 You haven't given enough info on this friendship for anyone to guess what is going on with your friend but I'll take a stab at it. It sounds like when he made the offer for you to visit he wasn't really prepared for you to say yes and now that you have something is making him have second thoughts. Perhaps he made that offer impulsively because it sounded like a really good idea in the moment but now he's changed his mind. He doesn't know how to tell you so he is just avoiding you altogether. I agree with you. Do you think he will avoid me forever and the friendship us over? Or just a while?
preraph Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 I would just caution you that he's probably not really a platonic friend and was hoping more for something like "I'm in love with you too." And now he's thinking She won't even say she loves me too but she expects me to buy a ticket. If it's not that, he's spinning his wheels getting money and his place together or trying to borrow money or something and so he doesn't want to answer until he knows if he can really even do that. Be sure you get a return ticket as well. Don't get stuck there! 2
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