hippychick3 Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Stubbornness everywhere. What if he apologised and said he had a hectic weekend? Can someone understand why she might have agreed to talk on the phone? like I don't get it, she could have just ignored me outright. That's not stubbornness. That's me choosing to date only men who are very interested. Guys with low interest are a waste of my time. I'm not going to be rude to the guy so may agree to the phone call. But, again, my interest has waned.
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 I am only interested in men who show high interest in me. Otherwise I'm moving on. A lot of women are like this. If a man does not show a consistent level of interest our interest fades. Women want attention, we want a healthy level of attention. We are not men, we do not enjoy chasing a man, we are not wired to chase men, if a woman chases a man other women will ask her where is her self-respect. When a man shows us a healthy level of attention we're excited, it gives us value. Just look on here, women are thrilled to hear from their date the following day!! 1
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Stubbornness everywhere. What if he apologised and said he had a hectic weekend? Can someone understand why she might have agreed to talk on the phone? like I don't get it, she could have just ignored me outright. Your changing your story. At first you said you waited Monday to contact her to create Attraction and it was the Corey's rule. Now you are saying you contacted her on a Monday because you were booked!
Vado Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Not in the context that you did. If you take me out on a week night, if you ignore me over an entire weekend and contact me on a Monday to invite me again on a week night date, then no, no way I am going to be thrilled. I met my boyfriend for the first time on a Tuesday. He asked me for a second date the following day and set it up for coming Saturday. He took me out to dinner and a movie on a prime-time date night. I knew then I was his main interest. Moviedate, seriously? It's a wonder, cause you don't get to know each other over the movies, do ya?
Versacehottie Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 The right ones. The ones who are equally ambitious and have a good life and aren't insecure and sitting by the phone every night. Its designed to weed out those who get butt hurt and cause drama, as well as weeding out those with so-so interest level from the beginning. so under his theories, it did exactly this: it weeded out a girl with so-so interest. Just accept that you were only so-so interesting. You can follow some guy's plan but if you are shooting out of your league or don't have chemistry from the girls point of view, there's nothing his plan is going to help you with. You are part of the so-so'ers in this case with her. 1
Author Swan89 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 A lot of women are like this. If a man does not show a consistent level of interest our interest fades. Women want attention, we want a healthy level of attention. We are not men, we do not enjoy chasing a man, we are not wired to chase men, if a woman chases a man other women will ask her where is her self-respect. When a man shows us a healthy level of attention we're excited, it gives us value. Just look on here, women are thrilled to hear from their date the following day!! Ok so what should I do? She allowed me to kiss her so there's interest right? Do I contact her again? A cheeky snapchat picture to break the ice?
Redhead14 Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Stubbornness everywhere. What if he apologised and said he had a hectic weekend? Can someone understand why she might have agreed to talk on the phone? like I don't get it, she could have just ignored me outright. Can someone understand why she might have agreed to talk on the phone? -- Sure, she was bored and felt like talking on the phone or she picked it up absentmindedly and didn't realize it was you and politely conversed or she was waiting for another guy to call and picked it up quickly hoping it was him and didn't notice caller ID or she knew it was you and was going to accept your invitation but you said something that put her off or her girlfriends dared her to answer it to play with your head . . .
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Moviedate, seriously? It's a wonder, cause you don't get to know each other over the movies, do ya? We had plenty of time to chit chat over dinner and a walk before the movie. We have been dating 7 months, seems his tactic worked better than yours. :-)
Vado Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Ok so what should I do? She allowed me to kiss her so there's interest right? Do I contact her again? A cheeky snapchat picture to break the ice? Bite your tongue, once a week in the early stages will do
Versacehottie Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 The reason behind his method is that when you pursue MORE than the woman does, it unbalances the polarity of masculine vs feminine energy- allowing her to do 70-80% of the pursuing. His method implements setting definite date places and times and continuing to do so on a weekly basis, allowing her space to wonder about you and as the dates keep coming, she reaches out more and more to the point that you pretty much no longer have to do any of the pursuing. Its to help keep guys from falling into the trap of becoming her emotional 'tampon', or 'gay male girlfriend' so to speak. I'm only a little familiar with him but i think this is where guys that follow him and people like him is that they interpret incorrectly. There is a nugget of truth in this in that if I like a guy and he is setting up dates like a masculine guy and doesn't really contact much in between, that wouldn't bother me so much. That's because that is a fine level of "pursuing" for some people. But I don't think that means she is going to make up the difference in between time in pursuing you trying to get you to do chit chat with her. AS your girl obviously didn't. Some girls will just be fine until they see you next time. In meantime, they can conclude you have not that interested behavior and/or another guy can swoop them up. Or if she is the one contacting you with texts to stay in touch in between, she can tire of doing that. You don't have to go all the way "male girlfriend" and you don't need to act like you've got nothing else going on in your life. Contact a bit here and there in a guy's way, shows you are thinking about her and is a good thing.
Redhead14 Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Ok so what should I do? She allowed me to kiss her so there's interest right? Do I contact her again? A cheeky snapchat picture to break the ice? Listen, overthinking is a product of insecurity and fear of being "rejected". Just take the leap if you really have an interest in her and call her and ask her one more time for a specific day, place and time and take whatever the outcome is. One more time, isn't going to hurt anything. Ten more times would. A cheeky snapchat picture to break the ice? -- ICE? She kissed you, there isn't any ice. You are making "ice" by letting too much time pass if anything.
Vado Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 We had plenty of time to chit chat over dinner and a walk before the movie. We have been dating 7 months, seems his tactic worked better than yours. :-) Maybe you guys were so made for each other, that the tactic worked despite the moviedate, instead of because of the movie. I meet her tomorrow. First date. Cant say it worked better, we haven't start yet.
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Can someone understand why she might have agreed to talk on the phone? -- Sure, she was bored and felt like talking on the phone or she picked it up absentmindedly and didn't realize it was you and politely conversed or she was waiting for another guy to call and picked it up quickly hoping it was him and didn't notice caller ID or she knew it was you and was going to accept your invitation but you said something that put her off or her girlfriends dared her to answer it to play with your head . . . Actually I remember being in her situation and picking up the phone. I liked the guy, my female ego was hurt from not being invited out on the weekend or not hearing from them for days. I picked up thinking maybe he will say or do something that will fix everything like he'll say he was at a hospital on life support type of thing. OP, what did you tell her on Monday?
Versacehottie Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 A big problem nowadays with a lot of guys is that they put the very pretty girls on a pedestral, they almost behave like her butler instead of potential lover. It's not so much about playing games, it's more about things not to do (don't put her on a pedestral, don't persue, don't be needy) and in a way guys don't have to change at all, because that's how they behave around all the women they have no romantic or sexual interest in (their sister, friends, cousins). She's not your queen. Relax! Well isn't that why guys like you guys need and respond to his strategies?? They are a bandaid for what comes authentically for other guys who have no problem dating. You don't know how to do a grey area. You either suck up and put the girl on a pedestal which is lame or need the strategies which you interpret incorrectly and in a black and white fashion because you can't rely on your own instincts. Thus it's a matter of time before you hit a situation where you can't cope on your own. 1
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Maybe you guys were so made for each other, that the tactic worked despite the moviedate, instead of because of the movie. I meet her tomorrow. First date. Cant say it worked better, we haven't start yet. I will surprise you. When I met him for the first time I had decided to not see him again for different reason. He was a gentleman from A to Z. He contacted me by calling, not texting, he invited me ahead of time, he did not overwhelmed me ever so I decided to accept his 2nd date. Then I liked him a little more and accepted a 3rd one. It was very fragile! If he had done something weird, or showed half an interest I would have been gone! but his gentleman ways, his sense of humor, his kindness won me over. SO yes even if the first date is not perfect it's still possible to win a woman over.
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 I meet her tomorrow. First date. Cant say it worked better, we haven't start yet. Wonderful, I'd love to see a thread about your date. Tell me, will you wait 4 days like OP and contact her again after the weekend like Tuesday night? or you will get off the pot and ask her out for a quick date for Sunday?
Author Swan89 Posted July 1, 2016 Author Posted July 1, 2016 Actually I remember being in her situation and picking up the phone. I liked the guy, my female ego was hurt from not being invited out on the weekend or not hearing from them for days. I picked up thinking maybe he will say or do something that will fix everything like he'll say he was at a hospital on life support type of thing. OP, what did you tell her on Monday? I asked how how her weekend has been, how her shift in work went in another town, just asked stuff about her and let her know I had plans on the Saturday to see my buddies of the weekend the passed. I then asked her if she was free to meet again this week.
Vado Posted July 1, 2016 Posted July 1, 2016 Well isn't that why guys like you guys need and respond to his strategies?? They are a bandaid for what comes authentically for other guys who have no problem dating. You don't know how to do a grey area. You either suck up and put the girl on a pedestal which is lame or need the strategies which you interpret incorrectly and in a black and white fashion because you can't rely on your own instincts. Thus it's a matter of time before you hit a situation where you can't cope on your own. yeah, but there's no alternative, can't do everything on your instinct. But maybe it's a bit like cardriving. You'have to learn it, but after a while you do a lot autopilot, but still there might be unexpected situations. Got to accept that life is not always fun. I know men who were intinctively good at seducing women, but later in live had a terrible divorce. It happends... but if ya can improve...for the better.
Versacehottie Posted July 1, 2016 Posted July 1, 2016 Stubbornness everywhere. What if he apologised and said he had a hectic weekend? Can someone understand why she might have agreed to talk on the phone? like I don't get it, she could have just ignored me outright. I'm not that stubborn and it would be understandable if someone after we had only gone on one first date was busy and took four days. Not the best but we are still learning about one another. She's learning about you and has a right to "change" her mind. Well correction: she is gathering info to ALLOW her to make a decision about whether to pursue things the next step with you. She is not changing per se, she is still deciding and everything you do contributes to that decision. So she may have agreed and you just seem like too much trouble for not enough attraction (that's the danger of the cw theories and others). So basically instead of ignoring the first time, she is ignoring you now. Happens all the time. Her decision about you is not an outcome or final stage yet. She is still deciding as lots of people do. You'd be wise to pay attention to what could have caused her to go quiet while on the date toward the end. Usually that means, especially if she was engaged before that she lost steam about you and has doubts in seeing it go further.
Gaeta Posted July 1, 2016 Posted July 1, 2016 Ok so what should I do? She allowed me to kiss her so there's interest right? Do I contact her again? A cheeky snapchat picture to break the ice? You could contact her again that would show an interest. If she'd be responsive I don't know but it can't hurt. You have nothing to lose. You could say you have 'insert time' free and if she'd like to grab a bite or 'insert activity'. On a scale of 1 to 10 how much you liked her?
Author Swan89 Posted July 1, 2016 Author Posted July 1, 2016 I'm not that stubborn and it would be understandable if someone after we had only gone on one first date was busy and took four days. Not the best but we are still learning about one another. She's learning about you and has a right to "change" her mind. Well correction: she is gathering info to ALLOW her to make a decision about whether to pursue things the next step with you. She is not changing per se, she is still deciding and everything you do contributes to that decision. So she may have agreed and you just seem like too much trouble for not enough attraction (that's the danger of the cw theories and others). So basically instead of ignoring the first time, she is ignoring you now. Happens all the time. Her decision about you is not an outcome or final stage yet. She is still deciding as lots of people do. You'd be wise to pay attention to what could have caused her to go quiet while on the date toward the end. Usually that means, especially if she was engaged before that she lost steam about you and has doubts in seeing it go further. Spot on there. Who knows, only time will tell the result. It could have been the loud music, nerves, not feeling it. But when I noticed her going quiet I took action and asked her about things, flirted, sat closer to her facing her, touching her back, etc.
Author Swan89 Posted July 1, 2016 Author Posted July 1, 2016 You could contact her again that would show an interest. If she'd be responsive I don't know but it can't hurt. You have nothing to lose. You could say you have 'insert time' free and if she'd like to grab a bite or 'insert activity'. On a scale of 1 to 10 how much you liked her? Nothing to lose indeed at this point. But I guess I might look like a sucker for trying to reach out now when she hasn't replied... Probably around a 6/7 at the moment.
Gaeta Posted July 1, 2016 Posted July 1, 2016 Nothing to lose indeed at this point. But I guess I might look like a sucker for trying to reach out now when she hasn't replied... Probably around a 6/7 at the moment. Who cares if you look like a sucker if you don't see her again.
Vado Posted July 1, 2016 Posted July 1, 2016 Wonderful, I'd love to see a thread about your date. Tell me, will you wait 4 days like OP and contact her again after the weekend like Tuesday night? or you will get off the pot and ask her out for a quick date for Sunday? Unless she brings it up 'hey there's this and that on sunday...' like an invitation from her for me to ask her to meet each other sunday, i'll probably wait 4 or 5 days, if there was a spark/click. But I do thank her the next morning after the date, even if there was no spark, cause that's polite (Corey wouldn't agree at this, but it never backfired so far). Once I had a date with a girl I liked but not more than that. Thanked her for the evening the next day. Guess what happend? 5 weeks later she texted me if I like to have a second date next weekend.
Gaeta Posted July 1, 2016 Posted July 1, 2016 But I do thank her the next morning after the date, even if there was no spark, cause that's polite (Corey wouldn't agree at this, but it never backfired so far).. I am glad to hear that, a thank you note will always leave a good impression on a woman.
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