Vado Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 @Swan89 if you like podcasts, you might want to check this site: https://www.datingskillsreview.com/podcast/ has interviews with all kinds off specialists about dating. I especially recommend Mark Manson, cause he talks about ´masculine vulnerablity´ which is not part of Corey´s repertoire, cause according to Corey dates always have to be playfull and fun, but what do you do if she starts to bring a seriouss topic you can´t make fun off?
katiegrl Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 (edited) I'm interested, i'm not going to wait just because. Exactly. Although if our date was a Friday and you had other plans all weekend, or were sick or something happened in your family or with a good friend, I would understand if you waited a few days to make contact... after a first MEET. But this intentionally waiting crap, for the purpose of increasing interest? Apparently it works on some women... I wish the men who get involved with suck chicks much luck. Because what happens when you do start indicating real interest and stop the games? Since the reason she was attracted was because you presented this "challenge" what happens when that challenge goes away? Or is a man supposed to continue implementing these strategies for the rest of his life, say if they get married? Does it ever stop? I would imagine it could become quite tiring. Edited June 30, 2016 by katiegrl
Author Swan89 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 @Swan89 if you like podcasts, you might want to check this site: https://www.datingskillsreview.com/podcast/ has interviews with all kinds off specialists about dating. I especially recommend Mark Manson, cause he talks about ´masculine vulnerablity´ which is not part of Corey´s repertoire, cause according to Corey dates always have to be playfull and fun, but what do you do if she starts to bring a seriouss topic you can´t make fun off? Thanks man. Looks interesting, I'll check it out!
Author Swan89 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 Exactly. Although if our date was a Friday and you had other plans all weekend, or were sick or something happened in your family or with a good friend, I would understand if you waited a few days to make contact... after a first MEET. But this intentionally waiting crap, for the purpose of increasing interest? Apparently it works on some women... I wish the men who get involved with suck chicks much luck. Because what happens when you do start indicating real interest and stop the games? Since the reason she was attracted was because you presented this "challenge" what happens when that challenge goes away? Or is a man supposed to continue implementing these strategies for the rest of his life, say if they get married? Does it ever stop? I would imagine it could become quite tiring. As Corey quotes, once you read the book- you need to read it again- several more times in order to ingest it and understand the psychology. Essentially, yes, you have to keep it up forever. Its a state of mind or way of life, per say. Because when a man starts going back to his old habits of chasing, she loses attraction.
katiegrl Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Thanks man. Looks interesting, I'll check it out! Swan, when is your second date with this chick? Just curious. I mean since this Cory guy's strategies work so well and all.... hehe 2
Vado Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Exactly. Although if our date was a Friday and you had other plans all weekend, or were sick or something happened in your family or with a good friend, I would understand if you waited a few days to make contact... after a first MEET. But this intentionally waiting crap, for the purpose of increasing interest? Apparently it works on some women... I wish the men who get involved with suck chicks much luck. Because what happens when you do start indicating real interest and stop the games? Since the reason she was attracted was because you presented this "challenge" what happens when that challenge goes away? Or is a man supposed to continue implementing these strategies for the rest of his life, say if they get married? Does it ever stop? I would imagine it could become quite tiring. A big problem nowadays with a lot of guys is that they put the very pretty girls on a pedestral, they almost behave like her butler instead of potential lover. It's not so much about playing games, it's more about things not to do (don't put her on a pedestral, don't persue, don't be needy) and in a way guys don't have to change at all, because that's how they behave around all the women they have no romantic or sexual interest in (their sister, friends, cousins). She's not your queen. Relax! 1
Author Swan89 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 Swan, when is your second date with this chick? Just curious. I mean since this Cory guy's strategies work so well and all.... hehe Originally Posted by Swan89 View Post The right ones. The ones who are equally ambitious and have a good life and aren't insecure and sitting by the phone every night. Its designed to weed out those who get butt hurt and cause drama, as well as weeding out those with so-so interest level from the beginning.
katiegrl Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 As Corey quotes, once you read the book- you need to read it again- several more times in order to ingest it and understand the psychology. Essentially, yes, you have to keep it up forever. Its a state of mind or way of life, per say. Because when a man starts going back to his old habits of chasing, she loses attraction. Well I don't believe in chasing either.... neither men nor women should "chase." So I agree with him there. But when one is secure within themselves, has good intuition and a modicum of perception... they should be able to judge each individual experience with a woman (or man) separately... and act on that experience accordingly... meaning your actions should be relative to that individual experience. Implementing the same strategy on every woman is bound to result in many failures. I can tell right now from what you've written, they wouldn't work with me. And like I said, I don't believe or even want a man to chase me, nor do I chase him. I believe in a 50/50 percent balance of power which means we BOTH pursue (not chase) "each other."
katiegrl Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Originally Posted by Swan89 View Post The right ones. The ones who are equally ambitious and have a good life and aren't insecure and sitting by the phone every night. Its designed to weed out those who get butt hurt and cause drama, as well as weeding out those with so-so interest level from the beginning. That's what I said! That she wasn't interested from the get go. At least we agree on something. 1
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 as weeding out those with so-so interest level from the beginning. So every girl that won't respond to your Guru's tactic will simply be not interested enough? 1
Author Swan89 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 So every girl that won't respond to your Guru's tactic will simply be not interested enough? Precisely.
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 On the first date we got chatting nicely and she said I'm the first guy to meet from the website and that 'you're the most normal'- which I took as a compliment. We went to another bar and it started getting busier, she got quiet towards the end which I took as an indicator of her perhaps not enjoying it. (She had to get a train home to be up early for work by the way). I took her kiss as a sign of interest but now I'm wondering if I'm wasting my time. To me that sounds like an interested woman. The date went nicely, she gave you compliments, she agreed to prolong the date to another bar. If she had not enjoyed herself she would have cut it short and not follow you to another spot. And finally you made out when she left. Something happened between Thursday and the next Monday, guess what it is ...
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Something happened between Thursday and the next Monday, guess what it is ... If your no-show for 4 days and over an entire weekend turned her off it's because.................She was interested TADAM!!
Author Swan89 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 (edited) To me that sounds like an interested woman. The date went nicely, she gave you compliments, she agreed to prolong the date to another bar. If she had not enjoyed herself she would have cut it short and not follow you to another spot. And finally you made out when she left. Something happened between Thursday and the next Monday, guess what it is ... I mean, if you REALLY like a guy, and he takes a few days after the date to initiate a new one, would you seriously turn them down? just because of that? come on... anything could have been going on in my personal life. You'd be thrilled if they asked you out again. I'd also like to add that she openly admitted to me on the date that she's 'hot headed and stubborn'. Edited June 30, 2016 by Swan89
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 I mean, if you REALLY like a guy, or a guy REALLY likes a girl, and he takes a few days after the date to initiate a new one, would you seriously turn them down? just because of that? come on... anything could have been going on in my personal life. You'd be thrilled if they asked you out again. Swan, you don't want to accept it but majority of women expect a call within 1-2 days , 3 top. Majority of women want to be invited out on weekends because it's prime-time date. We don't want to be your Thursday and Wednesday night filler. Majority of women want a man to show interest soon after a 1st date, we don't want you to suffocate us with 100 of calls but we want a clear show of interest with A) a call the following day or 2 days later and an invite for a 2nd date. I have a lot of dating experience. I have spent close to 4 years online. I have met up to 200 men. I could write the next book on dating. So lets not argue over and over, lets just see how you do in your next date with your tactic. Again, take a new girl out on a Thursday, don't make a noise for 4 days, ignore it's a weekend and you could be on an amazing 2nd date and contact her on Monday...to again offer her a weekday date. Lets see how successful that will be. 1
Author Swan89 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 Swan, you don't want to accept it but majority of women expect a call within 1-2 days , 3 top. Majority of women want to be invited out on weekends because it's prime-time date. We don't want to be your Thursday and Wednesday night filler. Majority of women want a man to show interest soon after a 1st date, we don't want you to suffocate us with 100 of calls but we want a clear show of interest with A) a call the following day or 2 days later and an invite for a 2nd date. I have a lot of dating experience. I have spent close to 4 years online. I have met up to 200 men. I could write the next book on dating. So lets not argue over and over, lets just see how you do in your next date with your tactic. Again, take a new girl out on a Thursday, don't make a noise for 4 days, ignore it's a weekend and you could be on an amazing 2nd date and contact her on Monday...to again offer her a weekday date. Lets see how successful that will be. You didn't answer my question. You know its logically reasonable. Honestly, if they are this stubborn over something like that then they are not the sort of woman I would want to date.
Lois_Griffin Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 I have to be honest. If I had a decent date with a guy and we kissed goodbye and he flippantly said to me, "text me" when we were leaving, that would be a huge turn off. 2
Author Swan89 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 I have to be honest. If I had a decent date with a guy and we kissed goodbye and he flippantly said to me, "text me" when we were leaving, that would be a huge turn off. Why? this is 2016, women are capable of reaching out, or at least letting them know they had a good time.
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 I mean, if you REALLY like a guy, and he takes a few days after the date to initiate a new one, would you seriously turn them down? just because of that? come on... anything could have been going on in my personal life. You'd be thrilled if they asked you out again. I'd also like to add that she openly admitted to me on the date that she's 'hot headed and stubborn'. Not in the context that you did. If you take me out on a week night, if you ignore me over an entire weekend and contact me on a Monday to invite me again on a week night date, then no, no way I am going to be thrilled. I met my boyfriend for the first time on a Tuesday. He asked me for a second date the following day and set it up for coming Saturday. He took me out to dinner and a movie on a prime-time date night. I knew then I was his main interest.
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Why? this is 2016, women are capable of reaching out, or at least letting them know they had a good time. Look up Beta male. 1
Author Swan89 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 Not in the context that you did. If you take me out on a week night, if you ignore me over an entire weekend and contact me on a Monday to invite me again on a week night date, then no, no way I am going to be thrilled. I met my boyfriend for the first time on a Tuesday. He asked me for a second date the following day and set it up for coming Saturday. He took me out to dinner and a movie on a prime-time date night. I knew then I was his main interest. The next day? Jesus... I mean, I already had plans that entire weekend, I was moving out, visiting family. Monday really was the only time I felt I had a breather to give her a call. Maybe this works for you... I guess everyone's different.
Gaeta Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 The next day? Jesus... I mean, I already had plans that entire weekend, I was moving out, visiting family. Monday really was the only time I felt I had a breather to give her a call. Maybe this works for you... I guess everyone's different. We did not go on a date the next day!! He contacted me and asked me for a date on the next Saturday, he was booking my time ahead of time. And yes in all of the dating I did, every man I went on a second date with, and that is a lot of men!! they reserved my time for the next date A) right after our 1st date B) within 2 days of our 1st date.
hippychick3 Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 No matter how interested I was in a guy on the first date...if he took 4 days to contact me again and those 4 days included Friday and Saturday, I would assume HE wasn't interested enough and then lose interest myself. I am only interested in men who show high interest in me. Otherwise I'm moving on. 2
Author Swan89 Posted June 30, 2016 Author Posted June 30, 2016 No matter how interested I was in a guy on the first date...if he took 4 days to contact me again and those 4 days included Friday and Saturday, I would assume HE wasn't interested enough and then lose interest myself. I am only interested in men who show high interest in me. Otherwise I'm moving on. Stubbornness everywhere. What if he apologised and said he had a hectic weekend? Can someone understand why she might have agreed to talk on the phone? like I don't get it, she could have just ignored me outright.
Versacehottie Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 I followed Corey's advice to the core. I did not chit chat, no texting, no texting to confirm the date on the day (she did) She asked if we could 'talk more before the date' to which I agreed but simply only replied to her initiated contact. I called to make a definite date both times. But obviously this time, she pretended she was interested in another date with the 'schedule check' routine. Gaeta, I am nearly 27 years old and I have dated around 10 women in my life. Only 2 of them long term as the rest had no long term potential. Ok, if you are 27 and dated 10 people why are you following some guy's advice to the tee. It did not work it appears. Can't you make your own decisions? If we were dating and I found that out, I might dump you for that alone. It feels lame. I do agree with not much chit chat before first date (unless you already know each other). I think it can take the wind out of the actual date. Guys that want to do a whole interview process before the date are also lame because that's what it can seem like. Ditto with girls who do the same. It should be more organic, chit chat about nothing is better. Every time one of my friends comes to me with a story that they talked a lot beforehand and had long conversations (text or phone) before the first date, it typically does not work out. That's because you suck the life out of what SHOULD be the excitement on the date which you will then both attribute to the date itself and the other person. I have a feeling that is not the reason he advises this but i do somewhat agree with it. HOWEVER, if some freak was essentially refusing to talk to the girl when she is really trying to talk to you beforehand, you will be giving out a bad impression before you even go on first date. I think fitnessfan always says it and i agree: talk a little bit, very little, set the plans as soon as possible; make sure she knows that you are very busy up until the time of the first date. All problems alleviated if you do that. You did act like you were uninterested with your actions and needing reassurance and inauthentic because your following some guy's rules rather than just going with the flow. Unfortunately, she did not get the chance to really meet "you", which may have been your real downfall. 1
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