cubfanforlife2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 (edited) Hi Everyone. I'm a 41 year old male, single dad. A week or so ago, I was at the pool with my two boys and I saw a woman with her kids who frequents the same gym as I do. We're both regulars at this gym and while I find her extremely attractive, I've never approached her or introduced myself because I find the gym an awkward place to meet women. Besides, she's always got her earbuds in and to me that says "leave me alone." We would say "hi" in passing, but nothing more. Anyway, when I was at the pool, I did notice her looking my way several times (at least that was my perception) and I was discretely stealing a few looks myself. Last Monday, she approached me at the gym and said, "I saw you at the pool with your kids the other day." She was friendly and we talked a bit and at the end of the conversation she introduced herself. So my question is... does this signal interest? Or was she being friendly? The fact that we never talked over a two year period and all of a sudden she introduces herself to me after seeing me outside the gym says to me that maybe she's shy and she saw an opportunity to open dialogue with me when before she didn't see an opening. Anyway, I've seen her a few times since and we exchanged hellos. I feel like now the ball's in my court and I need to initiate conversation. After which, I'll pull back and let her come to me again. If she does that would probably suggest interest. If she doesn't, she was probably just being friendly. I'd really appreciate some opinions on her level of interest. I've been out of the dating game a long time and my radar isn't what it used to be! Edited June 27, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator paragraphs ~6
smackie9 Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Ask her out for a coffee or a juice sometime. If she says yes she's interested. Tip: confidence wins the girl.
Dis Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 From a woman's perspective....It sounds like she's interested. I personally wouldnt approach a guy at the gym unless I was very interested She went out on a limb...make your move now Like smackie said....you need to be confident. It doesnt matter if you've been out of the dating scene for awhile....maybe she's in the same boat. As a woman I can honestly say I prefer guys who arent smooth talkers...I like guys who are humble Approach her and ask her out to do something casual She might be just as shy as you...maybe she got divorced 2 years ago and was giving herself time before she got back into dating....maybe now is your chance Be confident and positive hun! 1
KatZee Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 She gave you the green light to proceed. She's not looking for her new BFF. Women don't go up to men unless they're interested. Ever.
joseb Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Wow. She walked up and introduced herself? That's brave. Yes, the ball is most definitely in your court. Don't leave her hanging. 2
mizunomead Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Yes, initiate a conversation. And ask to go for coffee or something in the same conversation. Roll the dice and see what happens.
Author cubfanforlife2016 Posted June 28, 2016 Author Posted June 28, 2016 I saw her this morning at the gym and approached her the first opportunity I got (basically while she was in between sets). We made small talk and she seemed receptive. I even noticed her play with her hair a couple times, so it seems like game on. I kept the convo very brief...basically to the topic I opened with. I almost went on but caught myself before I dragged the convo out longer than it needed to be. I'm going to let her come to me one more time before asking her out. I've noticed she gets a lot of male attention so 1.) I need to set my self apart from all the other guys who give her CONSTANT attention 2.) Let her think about me a little more and see if she comes back.
mizunomead Posted June 28, 2016 Posted June 28, 2016 i think everyone has their own style so to speak. personally im a bit more assertive so i would go with asking her to meet up sometime. make my intentions known to her and put the ball in her court to respond to me more directly. good luck
PogoStick Posted June 28, 2016 Posted June 28, 2016 Anyway, when I was at the pool, I did notice her looking my way several times (at least that was my perception) and I was discretely stealing a few looks myself. Last Monday, she approached me at the gym and said, "I saw you at the pool with your kids the other day." She was friendly and we talked a bit and at the end of the conversation she introduced herself. Actually, at the pool is when you should have manned up, approached her and said "Hey, don't I see you at the XXX gym?" Luckily she womaned up for you. Yes, she opened the door. In fact, when she approached you at the gym was your 2nd chance to ask her out and you missed that too Ask her out already!
sc0316 Posted June 28, 2016 Posted June 28, 2016 If you don't make a move soon, she'll lose interest. Next time, after some opening small talk, just tell her you enjoy chatting with her and let's continue the convo over drinks. 2
joseb Posted June 28, 2016 Posted June 28, 2016 Let her think about me a little more and see if she comes back. She has already gone out on a limb making the initial approach. Ask her out, before it starts becoming awkward or you are friend zoned. 1
tndawg Posted June 30, 2016 Posted June 30, 2016 Dating is hard when you are older and been out of it for while. It sounds like you both have been cautious and respectable. Why not ask her for coffee or a smoothie after the gym? Whatever you choose to do, remain the gentleman you have portrayed. That is always the way to go.
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted July 1, 2016 Posted July 1, 2016 Wow women usually don't do that the way she walked up to you
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