james1990 Posted June 22, 2016 Posted June 22, 2016 Hi everyone, So I went on a date with a girl recently and it seemed to go pretty well. We've already arranged another date for less than a week from now. When it comes to texting, I am always the one who initiates the convo. What does this mean?Should I wait to see how long she texts back?
nickflick Posted June 22, 2016 Posted June 22, 2016 Hi everyone, So I went on a date with a girl recently and it seemed to go pretty well. We've already arranged another date for less than a week from now. When it comes to texting, I am always the one who initiates the convo. What does this mean?Should I wait to see how long she texts back? I wouldn't stress about it too much tbh. (Even though you are going to don't worry I know the feeling) but do what I usually do: Text her once then wait like two or three hours, check the text to see if maybe she might have been unable to add anything. Ask a completely harmless question perhaps relating to what you are talking about. THEN DON"T TEXT HER ANYMORE. Wait a bit until she responds and at this point the ball is in her court. Let her respond if and if she doesn't maybe shes busy. Just remember, really it doesn't matter till you are at the next date. She kinda has to respond then and that way you can get a feel for what type of stuff she likes to talk about. Bottomline is don't read too much into text messages and text message response times; they tend to be poor indicators of a persons actual feelings or situations. I know from personal experience
Author james1990 Posted June 22, 2016 Author Posted June 22, 2016 I wouldn't stress about it too much tbh. (Even though you are going to don't worry I know the feeling) but do what I usually do: Text her once then wait like two or three hours, check the text to see if maybe she might have been unable to add anything. Ask a completely harmless question perhaps relating to what you are talking about. THEN DON"T TEXT HER ANYMORE. Wait a bit until she responds and at this point the ball is in her court. Let her respond if and if she doesn't maybe shes busy. Just remember, really it doesn't matter till you are at the next date. She kinda has to respond then and that way you can get a feel for what type of stuff she likes to talk about. Bottomline is don't read too much into text messages and text message response times; they tend to be poor indicators of a persons actual feelings or situations. I know from personal experience Thanks man I appreciate it.
gkly Posted June 22, 2016 Posted June 22, 2016 (edited) Most girls prefer guys to text first. There are so many blogs out there telling girls to not initiate text to avoid looking needy. Also she may not like texting or be a phone-attached person. Keep in mind that at the first/second date stage, there is nothing because it's a testing period. Guy I'm seeing (4 wks now) texted me every morning from the beginning. He texted inside jokes, pictures, or flirty comments. I was surprised by this because not many guys do this. He's still doing it and it makes me happy. This lets a girl feel stable and more confident to text you first. But yes, first try to see if she responds to your text all the time (even though she may take a long time, as long as she's replying you have a chance) and keeps her text positive. Also, interactions during a date will tell you more about her feeling. Edited June 22, 2016 by gkly
Larryville Posted June 22, 2016 Posted June 22, 2016 Bottomline is don't read too much into text messages and text message response times; they tend to be poor indicators of a persons actual feelings or situations. I know from personal experience. After reading so many text threads this is an issue I am continuing to evolve on, having said that in my (recent) experience, most of the women I have started conversing with, (did meet) all very busy types, demanding jobs… also these primarily are 50 plus, I’m 52. The interest they have in me equates to text response times and type of texts. Before if I liked them I tried to initiate texts for that day (Good Morning, how are you) type texts. I have stopped doing that, and since I have stopped going that I can tell quicker about their interest. I get more (was about to go to a meeting, wanted to see how your day was) type of texts. If the interest is/was not as strong their response times were considerable longer, and you can tell tone of the texts as well. When I started reading these text threads I rolled my eyes, but now I find myself paying more attention and freaking analyzing it more. Typical obsessive type behavior I know… 2
Author james1990 Posted June 22, 2016 Author Posted June 22, 2016 Thanks everyone your replies are helpful. When we do end up texting her replies are pretty quick. My question is, if I end off the day with the last text, should I always be the first one to text the next day?
gkly Posted June 23, 2016 Posted June 23, 2016 text if you want to, you're over-thinking... Just don't text bomb her. Stay on topic and don't throw multiple questions or change topics alone. Text is a text, so don't take it as phone conversation. Use it to ask about her day so you let her know she's in your mind. The purpose of texting is to keep the chemistry flowing and to set up dates.
kendahke Posted June 23, 2016 Posted June 23, 2016 Hi everyone, So I went on a date with a girl recently and it seemed to go pretty well. We've already arranged another date for less than a week from now. When it comes to texting, I am always the one who initiates the convo. What does this mean?Should I wait to see how long she texts back? If you want to text her, then text her. don't turn this into a game. Understand that some people aren't texters---perhaps she'd rather wait until she's face to face to communicate with you. 1
thelastunicorn Posted June 23, 2016 Posted June 23, 2016 If she's responding right away then you're probably good. I don't text guys first because I want to be able to gauge their interest and that's much harder to do if I'm the one initiating. I think texts should be a back and forth thing. If you sent the last text the night before then the ball is in her court to keep the conversation going the next day. I would start getting concerned if you've been dating for a couple weeks and she still expects you to always initiate.
Author james1990 Posted June 23, 2016 Author Posted June 23, 2016 So after 2 days she finally text me this morning. Score! Thanks for the help everybody.
tinkerbell16 Posted June 23, 2016 Posted June 23, 2016 Thanks everyone your replies are helpful. When we do end up texting her replies are pretty quick. My question is, if I end off the day with the last text, should I always be the first one to text the next day?[ I prefer for the man to always take the lead with texting. I am pretty busy with my work so it does make it difficult to reach out randomly it does not mean I'm not interested in any way though.
Cablebandit Posted June 24, 2016 Posted June 24, 2016 You could just ask why she doesn't initiate texts. You will find out one more thing about her from her answer.
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