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Posted

Hi, I hoping for some advice on why I am feeling like this.

 

So to give you a bit of background, I've been dating this girl for nearly 5 1/2 months and it has so far been the best relationship I've been in. I love her a lot and she loves me a lot too, we get along really well, we have a lot of fun and have only really fought once or twice.

 

Now, for some reason, every time I don't see her for more than a few days I feel really insecure and think she's gonna talk to other guys or cheat on me but I have no idea why I feel like this. I trust her 100% (please don't comment saying I obviously don't because I do) and I know she would never cheat on me because she regularly talks about our long term future, like morning in together or going travelling together. But for some reason I feel insecure whenever I don't see her for a few days and I can't explain it.

 

I don't want to feel like this any more and what annoys me more is I know I have no reason to feel like this.

 

Any advice on how I get over this feeling would be appreciated. Thanks.

  • Like 1
Posted

Firstly, say this to yourself, when you get those uncomfortable feelings:

 

 

"These are my feelings, and I am responsible for them."

 

 

These feelings are not about her.

 

They are about you.

 

They exist, in you.

 

Don't give yourself a hard time, for having those feelings, but do step back and examine them objectively, from a mental distance.

 

 

Ask yourself:

 

 

"Is she trustworthy?" "Yes."

 

"Is she loyal to me?" "Yes."

 

"Would she cheat on me, behind my back?" "No."

 

"Can I afford to trust her?" "Yes."

 

 

Ask and answer aloud.

 

 

It's a bit like a pilot's preflight checklist, you just own the feelings, and do your checklist.

 

You'll be OK.

 

You won't mess this up.

 

 

Take care.

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