katiegrl Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 I walk to/from work every day, about a mile, and if I work late, even 9:00 pm, I call a cab. If it is after dark, I don't walk it, at least not alone. Still cannot believe this guy let you do this. I know you make your own choices, but come on dude (referring to him)...
Gaeta Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 I walk to/from work every day, about a mile, and if I work late, even 9:00 pm, I call a cab. If it is after dark, I don't walk it, at least not alone. Still cannot believe this guy let you do this. I know you make your own choices, but come on dude (referring to him)... They were both in town and left each their way. It's not like she left his home at 2 am. When I was dating and left my date downtown they usually would offer to walk me to my metro station but from there I was responsible for my safety. Something could have happened in the metro or in parking lot where I left my car, it was not my date's responsibility. OP should have taken a taxi or public transportation. 2
stillafool Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 We had a small chat on monday, he asked where it all happened. And later in the afternoon we had a short chat, not about what happened. I definitely might have been infatuated, but nevertheless I think it's a principle to make sure whether it's a colleague, vague acquaintance, a girl you just met or a FWB to make sure they're allright. Whether I was big, fat and the most annoying or ugly girl in the world, whether the guy is sexually interested or not, he should just make sure someone's allright after such an attack. I think it very selfcentered, really. As I said, I wasn't being the damsel in distress or exaggerating at all about what happened. I know some state that I can't expect this from a 'FWB' kind a guy, but for f* sake, we are both human beings as well, and this was defo a matter of humanity and what is civilized to do. Did you contact him for the chat or did he contact you? He also could have thought that if you were in terrible distress you would be calling the police, or a close relative, instead of him. 2
Emilia Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 I don't want to get too far off topic, but in the many threads I've read on here about FWB, I'd say very few of them have a real underlying friendship at their base. I think the majority just use it as a more civilized term for f-buddies. Fully agree. I think it's a lot about people's expectations and boundaries. As I understand it, the fbuddies thing is not very frequent, the FWB thing requires more frequency - but everything else is the same. This guy wanted nothing to do with the situation, why waste a whole thread on him page after page? Should have spoken to your family or whoever else.
Emilia Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 Did you contact him for the chat or did he contact you? He also could have thought that if you were in terrible distress you would be calling the police, or a close relative, instead of him. Yes this exactly.
Emilia Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 Still cannot believe this guy let you do this. I know you make your own choices, but come on dude (referring to him)... Let? She is a grown woman. 1
Author Vicky876 Posted June 15, 2016 Author Posted June 15, 2016 They were both in town and left each their way. It's not like she left his home at 2 am. When I was dating and left my date downtown they usually would offer to walk me to my metro station but from there I was responsible for my safety. Something could have happened in the metro or in parking lot where I left my car, it was not my date's responsibility. OP should have taken a taxi or public transportation. EXCUSE ME, I was DEFINITELY NOT holding him responsible for the attack! I felt safe enough going home alone! Walked a zillion times alone to my home, by day or by night, never felt particularly threatened or unsafe. So again, nót holding him responsible. I was just saying, again, that I felt left alone and unvalued by the way he responded to the fact that I was attacked.
Author Vicky876 Posted June 15, 2016 Author Posted June 15, 2016 Did you contact him for the chat or did he contact you? He also could have thought that if you were in terrible distress you would be calling the police, or a close relative, instead of him. The next day he responded to what I send him that night after it happened.
Gaeta Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 EXCUSE ME, I was DEFINITELY NOT holding him responsible for the attack! I felt safe enough going home alone! Walked a zillion times alone to my home, by day or by night, never felt particularly threatened or unsafe. So again, nót holding him responsible. I was just saying, again, that I felt left alone and unvalued by the way he responded to the fact that I was attacked. You misunderstood me. I was not telling you he was responsible for your safety. I was responding to katiegrl and telling her that you are responsible for your own safety. Before attacking make sure you get it right.
katiegrl Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 (edited) Let? She is a grown woman. haha, I knew I was gonna get dinged for that.... I didn't know what other word to use -- allowed maybe? That didn't sound right either. I dunno, I guess my experiences with men have been different. Perhaps because they actually gave a crap. But none of them would have been comfortable with me walking home alone at that ungodly hour. They would have either walked me home themselves or insisted I call a cab, or Uber.... if I had insisted on walking alone, which I NEVER would have in the first place. I would have called a cab. Personally, I'd be scared shytless walking home at 2:00 am in the morn by myself. Just me. Edited June 15, 2016 by katiegrl 1
katiegrl Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 Vicki have they caught the guy? Just for next time, IF, god forbid anything like this happens again, immediately call 911. That way, the police can be dispatched immediately so they can catch the guy!
Recommended Posts