Kristine Posted June 12, 2016 Posted June 12, 2016 I'm trying to understand something about a guy I'm interested in. He's been divorced. But his current status is long term relationship over 5 years. See my mom told me never waste years on a guy so I really don't have an understanding of LTR. She says either get married or get moving onto someone you want to marry. Quite dragging out the inevitable. Ok so said guy flirted mercilessly with me I've hinted interest but I will not date a guy involved with another and honestly I don't feel too keen on a recent breakup either. I know a few things about her from what he's shared. She makes more money than him. She likes guy stuff. Frankly she's the man in that relationship. I'm more of a girly girl in comparison. He has described her as fashionable, wealthy, kids, and years together. My coworker friend says he's totally in love with me. He has said I have changed his life. Yet I barely know him. So I'm planning to just go about my work. I don't want to push him to end things than blame me for busting up his life. What a predicament. This is my new job. 3rd week Monday.
carhill Posted June 12, 2016 Posted June 12, 2016 Unmarried couples have become more commonplace in my demographic (50's-70's) of late, as older folks get divorced and enjoy more free-form associations without marital entanglements. I've also noted a few friends, while apparently quite interested in and coupled in the relationship sense, have no interest in living together, preferring their long-time personal homes where they can gather and host family as they have for a long time. If this guy is demonstrably with someone else, like they're seen as a couple socially, and especially if they live together, IMO no sense in investing anything into the milieu. Such people can be good for transitory social fun, flirting, or casual sex as one's proclivities deem appropriate but IMO nothing long-term. If he's totally in love with you and you've indeed changed his life, he'll have no problem pursuing those ideals unabashedly single because, well, you're worth it. Right? 1
Author Kristine Posted June 12, 2016 Author Posted June 12, 2016 Thank you for your insight. I will step back and focus on my job. He can than figure out his life. Right now I'm detoxing, and healing my body from the traumas of my last experience. I will not be having an affair. Healing/recovery and work are my focus.
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