Author katiegrl Posted June 11, 2016 Author Posted June 11, 2016 Don't they have a registry? If they did, hopefully they picked a variety of gifts (expensive, not so expensive) to accommodate the financial means of the people who wanna gift them. My fav podcaster was talking about how she was impressed on her son and daughter-in-law's care to others who were going to come to the wedding. They literally went to a department store (not those expensive bridal stores) and picked out bridesmaid dresses that literally were on sale and had additional discounts - and, because they were not actually bridesmaids dresses (they were evening gowns) the people who were going to be the bridesmaids could re-use/sell them. I like people like that, they are more about sharing the moment (their unity as man/wife) rather than imposing their fairytale of expensive dress, event, and/or gifts on people who they expect to attend the wedding and/or send them gifts. So, if on their wedding registry they got nothing but expensive crap, then send them a card and who cares what they think. -- **How rude it is for them to impose upon others...IMO. ^^Lol, I don't want to start trashing my SS (more than I have been), but yeah I think it is rather rude too. To not have convenient parking available and expect your guests to Uber or taxi? Gifts are expected so that is not a huge deal to me. My SS is well off financially so forking out $150 for a cab is no big deal to her, but not everyone can afford that to attend a wedding. I think it is a bit much to ask that of your guests. I wouldn't! Again, if we were close I would. But not as things stand now, and how they've been for years.
Gloria25 Posted June 11, 2016 Posted June 11, 2016 Hi Gloria. Thank but pls read my post right before yours ... no. 23. It's an outdoor buffet, at the bride's aunt's home. Not a formal sit down. No registry, it is very casual. But to answer your question, she called me and invited me before invites were emailed out, sort of put me on the spot so I initially said yes. But after thinking about it, and with everyone's great input. ... I will change my yes to no. And send card with money order. Sorry I didn't read the entire thread, but still, even for a buffet, if I'm correct a head count would still be necessary to ensure adequate estimate of food needed that an average person would consume, no? 1
Author katiegrl Posted June 11, 2016 Author Posted June 11, 2016 (edited) Sorry I didn't read the entire thread, but still, even for a buffet, if I'm correct a head count would still be necessary to ensure adequate estimate of food needed that an average person would consume, no? No I doubt it. She knows me I eat like a bird anyway, and I don't drink alcohol.... I am not concerned about her losing money if I say no now.... A sit down, yes. But not a buffet. She only invited me out of obligation anyway, no love lost between us.... She won't care..... Edited June 11, 2016 by katiegrl
Leigh 87 Posted June 12, 2016 Posted June 12, 2016 She was obligated to invite you because you are family. You don't want to go, and she probably doesn't want you there. Send your regrets. Gift is optional, but a nice thing to do for the kid.[/quote Gifts should be reserved for the less fortunate who actually need them. Or your actual friends or close family who doesnt trash talk you. I am sure the son and his wife have perfectly good jobs and have no need for gifts from virtual strangers. Personally, I would not be comfortable in accepting wedding gifts from distant family members with whom I dont have a relationship with.
Author katiegrl Posted June 12, 2016 Author Posted June 12, 2016 She was obligated to invite you because you are family. You don't want to go, and she probably doesn't want you there. Send your regrets. Gift is optional, but a nice thing to do for the kid.[/quote Gifts should be reserved for the less fortunate who actually need them. Or your actual friends or close family who doesnt trash talk you. I am sure the son and his wife have perfectly good jobs and have no need for gifts from virtual strangers. Personally, I would not be comfortable in accepting wedding gifts from distant family members with whom I dont have a relationship with. Well my nephew never trashed me and the gift would be for him and his wife as they begin their lives together . Not my SS. 1
Toodaloo Posted June 13, 2016 Posted June 13, 2016 Its your nephews wedding not your step sisters. It is traditional for the parents to invite guests. Sod your step sister. Do you like your nephew and do you want to celebrate his impending marriage with him? If the answer is yes then go and take a gift and celebrate with him and wish him well. If the answer is no then send apologies with best wishes and leave it at that. Simples. Problem solved. 1
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