kaynichole Posted June 4, 2016 Posted June 4, 2016 Hi all, I started seeing this guy, things got pretty serious between us. He asked me for exclusivity, I concurred and I thought everything was great with us. However, last night I saw he was hanging out with his ex fiancé at a bar. There were other people around but she was sitting on his lap in one of the photos posted on Facebook that he was tagged in. As if that isn't enough of a red flag, I coincidentally stumbled across the fact that he has a Plenty Of Fish Account where all of his information is correct except he is using a fake name and he lies about having children (says he has none and he has 3). It shows that he was 'online now' on POF when I found it and he was also on Facebook at the same time so I know it's him. My friend also said he has a KIK (whatever that is). Anyway, I know I am being played. Now I am concerned with how I should address it. Should I delete/block him and not say a word or should I let him know he didn't pull a fast one on me and tell him where to go and how to get there and THEN delete/block?
Buddhist Posted June 4, 2016 Posted June 4, 2016 There is nothing to be gained by trying to get revenge, call him out or whatever. If this is his usual MO then he'll shrug his shoulders and not care. Any kind of confrontation is just giving him space to explain it all away and play you again or to hurt you by showing how little he cares. Neither of them are good options for you. Disappear without a word. It's not as if a tongue lashing from you will change his ways. 2
salparadise Posted June 4, 2016 Posted June 4, 2016 Anyway, I know I am being played. Now I am concerned with how I should address it. Should I delete/block him and not say a word... If you're actually done then it doesn't matter - whatever gives you satisfaction. If you're going to engage him, then you have to try and predict the outcomes of various moves. I think it would be fun to create a POF profile (fake) and lure him into telling a bunch of lies. See just how far he's willing to take it. Then the next time you see him give him little clues, references to the online conversation... culminating in him wiping food and drink off of himself as you exit. Or set up a meeting with the fake woman, and you show up instead. 1
Author kaynichole Posted June 4, 2016 Author Posted June 4, 2016 If you're actually done then it doesn't matter - whatever gives you satisfaction. If you're going to engage him, then you have to try and predict the outcomes of various moves. I think it would be fun to create a POF profile (fake) and lure him into telling a bunch of lies. See just how far he's willing to take it. Then the next time you see him give him little clues, references to the online conversation... culminating in him wiping food and drink off of himself as you exit. Or set up a meeting with the fake woman, and you show up instead. You are an evil genius. I love the way you think!! That just might work. Absolutely fantastic.
morrowrd Posted June 4, 2016 Posted June 4, 2016 The quickest means to an end is a straight line. Do it in person however, so he can't have "problems with cell phone service" or that he disappears because he had to charge his phone. Be sweet, but blunt. "I noticed that you have a plenty of fish account that's active." See how he responds, then ask why all the false information. Once you get him going, probably some story about his account being hacked, or some other creative lie, bring up the lap dance on facebook. Once you've had your closure, walk away.
Otter2569 Posted June 4, 2016 Posted June 4, 2016 With someone like that I would want to call them out. I'd want them to know that I am not the idiot they tried to play me for then I would be gone. I'd probably meet him for drinks and have printed out the FB pics and his POF profile. I would start slow and lead with the pics which he will explain away. Then call him by his fake POF name "so Johnny Boy" and watch him turn white. Finally pullout the POF profile and ask him to explain it. At that point I would walk away. 1
Sweetgirl28 Posted June 4, 2016 Posted June 4, 2016 I have recently seen this with a guy I met on POF. He sounded like a great catch on there. In the airforce, Master's degree, creative, open-minded, financially stable, single (never been married), no kids. Until I met him in real life... He was weird. He immediately put his arm around me. He smelled funny. The first thing he asked me was if I had coins for the parking meter... I said I didn't have any so he wanted me to get into his car with him to find a free parking spot. I refused telling him it would be hard to find another parking spot as it was crowded there. After going back and forth for a while, we found someone to change coins with, and we were good to go. We went for a drink and although the conversation was ok, I didn't feel attracted to him at all. We said our goodbyes, and I decided to look him up on Facebook after I got home. Turns out he was a divorced father of one... His wedding photos were still up (barely 5 years ago). His daughter had her own profile although she seemed only 7 or 8. I wouldn't be surprised if he had a girlfriend too although he was quite ugly. Additionally, I found him on every free dating website you can think of; badoo, pof, okcupid. I didn't check Tinder since I'm not using that but I wouldn't be surprised if he were on that too. My biggest problem with him was not his looks, personality or weird odor but rather the fact that he lied about being divorced with a child. This is clearly a person who believes they are more desirable to women when they present themselves as childless singles who just haven't found the right woman yet. Fact of the matter is this is a horny liar that looks ok from the outside but is some kind of perv behind closed doors. Run for the hills while you still can because you'll never be able to fix such a man!
VeveCakes Posted June 4, 2016 Posted June 4, 2016 What a loser. Just block and delete..let him figure it out himself. 1
Conviction Posted June 4, 2016 Posted June 4, 2016 If you're actually done then it doesn't matter - whatever gives you satisfaction. If you're going to engage him, then you have to try and predict the outcomes of various moves. I think it would be fun to create a POF profile (fake) and lure him into telling a bunch of lies. See just how far he's willing to take it. Then the next time you see him give him little clues, references to the online conversation... culminating in him wiping food and drink off of himself as you exit. Or set up a meeting with the fake woman, and you show up instead. I once caught an ex with an active online dating account. My only regret was not creating a fake account to lure her. I immediately called her out on it, and she denied that it was active and said "I had it hidden, I don't know why it's showing up". I knew it was BS, but it was too late to prove it 100%.
PogoStick Posted June 4, 2016 Posted June 4, 2016 You are an evil genius. I love the way you think!! That just might work. Absolutely fantastic. You both have too much time on your hands for petty SHT. I'd rather spend my time and energy chasing the next winner. 1
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