Sweetgirl28 Posted June 2, 2016 Posted June 2, 2016 I went out on a date last Monday. It was someone I had been talking to for a little over a month. I was excited to meet him because I liked his personality but not so much his looks. We finally met up and went for drinks. We spent nearly 4 hours together although it didn't seem that long. I had a great time, and I think he did too because there was a lot of playful banter. He also didn't try to leave. In fact, he tried to extend the date. At the end, he walkd me to my apartment and he asked me what my impression was of him. I reacted fairly positively but that I don't know him that well yet. The goodbye seemed awkward because he got shy and he didn't seem to know what to do/say. I gave him a hug. He asked for my number, and texted me about half an hour later and I responded. So far so good. I really felt a connection because we seemed to have so much in common. Then nothing... Tonight it will have been exactly 3 days. I was wondering if he is pulling the 3 day rule trick on me, or whether he really wasn't interested? 1
PegNosePete Posted June 2, 2016 Posted June 2, 2016 What difference does it make? Either way you should probably just move on. Don't date game players. 2
The_Dork_Lard Posted June 2, 2016 Posted June 2, 2016 He's probably wondering the same. Why not text him? 2
Author Sweetgirl28 Posted June 2, 2016 Author Posted June 2, 2016 True but I get the feeling that it may be due to lack of experience rather than malicious intent. 1
PegNosePete Posted June 2, 2016 Posted June 2, 2016 He's probably wondering the same. Why not text him? She already did. 3 days ago. He didn't respond. 2
Author Sweetgirl28 Posted June 2, 2016 Author Posted June 2, 2016 He's probably wondering the same. Why not text him? I texted him last. It was just a good night text. I feel as if the ball is in his court now. 3
The_Dork_Lard Posted June 2, 2016 Posted June 2, 2016 I texted him last. It doesn't mean you can't text him again. There's no shame in initiating a text when it's "not your turn". Just don't initiate too many more after that... unless he initiates some.
Author Sweetgirl28 Posted June 2, 2016 Author Posted June 2, 2016 I know but I suspect he is doing that 3 day waiting period. He hasn't logged on to the dating website since we met so I assume there is some level of interest there. As I have mentioned before, I sense he may be a little inexperienced. He hasn't dated in a while, and he is also quite new to my country.
The_Dork_Lard Posted June 2, 2016 Posted June 2, 2016 I sense he may be a little inexperienced. He hasn't dated in a while, Give him a little helping hand then, and text him, just this once. What's the worst that can happen? 1
Arieswoman Posted June 2, 2016 Posted June 2, 2016 Personally OP, I would leave it be. He knows where you are and, as you say the ball's in his court. Let him do the chasing, guys appreciate you more if they have to do the heavy lifting. 3
Author Sweetgirl28 Posted June 2, 2016 Author Posted June 2, 2016 Personally OP, I would leave it be. He knows where you are and, as you say the ball's in his court. Let him do the chasing, guys appreciate you more if they have to do the heavy lifting. Thanks, Arieswoman! Since you also seem to be into astrology, this guy is a Sagittarius. I have never dated anyone of that sign before by most of my friends are Sags.
Lois_Griffin Posted June 2, 2016 Posted June 2, 2016 Astrological signs have little to do with real life. I'm supposed to be free-spirited and able to change my direction on a whim and the type to backpack through Europe. I'm NONE of those ridiculous things. I couldn't be the more polar opposite of all that if I tried. So so much for that nonsense. You texted last - a 'goodnight' text. How the hell is he supposed to answer that? You can't say the ball is in his court when your last text was just a thank you and goodnight text. Sheesh. There's nothing wrong with sending a little text to say "just saying hi and hope all is well...." If he ignores it or sends back a response "I'm good, thanks..." and doesn't keep the conversation going, you'll have your answer. 4
Author Sweetgirl28 Posted June 2, 2016 Author Posted June 2, 2016 Astrological signs have little to do with real life. I'm supposed to be free-spirited and able to change my direction on a whim and the type to backpack through Europe. I'm NONE of those ridiculous things. I couldn't be the more polar opposite of all that if I tried. So so much for that nonsense. You texted last - a 'goodnight' text. How the hell is he supposed to answer that? You can't say the ball is in his court when your last text was just a thank you and goodnight text. Sheesh. There's nothing wrong with sending a little text to say "just saying hi and hope all is well...." If he ignores it or sends back a response "I'm good, thanks..." and doesn't keep the conversation going, you'll have your answer. It was more than just "goodnight". He had ample opportunity to respond to that, or at least pick up the conversation from there. So much for your "sheesh".
Zippy2000 Posted June 2, 2016 Posted June 2, 2016 I know but I suspect he is doing that 3 day waiting period. He hasn't logged on to the dating website since we met so I assume there is some level of interest there. Im sorry but by not logging onto the same dating site you met isnt really an indication of the level of interest he has with you. For all you know he could have got a couple of other womens number from the same site and dating others. He could aslo be using another web site. I use 2 dating web sites and I prefer one to the other. You seem keen on him. Why not just shoot a text to see how he is.
Author Sweetgirl28 Posted June 3, 2016 Author Posted June 3, 2016 He contacted me yesterday to ask me out again. I guess he is one of those guys that think the 3 day rule is an obligation...
Zippy2000 Posted June 3, 2016 Posted June 3, 2016 He contacted me yesterday to ask me out again. I guess he is one of those guys that think the 3 day rule is an obligation... Note to other people on this site and this thread as an example. Please dont worry or stress about someone not getting back to you after a date. Best wait AFTER 3 days before you post 2
stillafool Posted June 3, 2016 Posted June 3, 2016 Thanks, Arieswoman! Since you also seem to be into astrology, this guy is a Sagittarius. I have never dated anyone of that sign before by most of my friends are Sags. What sign are you?
Arieswoman Posted June 3, 2016 Posted June 3, 2016 OP, You said, Thanks, Arieswoman! Since you also seem to be into astrology, this guy is a Sagittarius. I have never dated anyone of that sign before by most of my friends are Sags. Disclaimer ; those who think Astrology is bunk, read no further... If he's a Saggy he's a free spirit and a bit hard to pin down, (in fact they will oppose all efforts to do that !) but that's a generalisation. Other factors in his chart would have to be taken into account before knowing the full picture. Astrology aside, I would just let him take things at his own pace... 1
Author Sweetgirl28 Posted June 3, 2016 Author Posted June 3, 2016 OP, You said, Disclaimer ; those who think Astrology is bunk, read no further... If he's a Saggy he's a free spirit and a bit hard to pin down, (in fact they will oppose all efforts to do that !) but that's a generalisation. Other factors in his chart would have to be taken into account before knowing the full picture. Astrology aside, I would just let him take things at his own pace... I agree. I have been dating mainly air signs (Libra & Gemini) and Leos. This is my first Sag experience but I think it's quite exciting since I'm somewhat the same way. Free spirit. Emotionally aloof at times and very slow to commit. My main concern in the beginning is whether they are interested or not so I can expect attention or move on altogether before I invest in them.
LostOnes05 Posted June 3, 2016 Posted June 3, 2016 Astrological signs have little to do with real life. I'm supposed to be free-spirited and able to change my direction on a whim and the type to backpack through Europe. I'm NONE of those ridiculous things. I couldn't be the more polar opposite of all that if I tried. So so much for that nonsense. You texted last - a 'goodnight' text. How the hell is he supposed to answer that? You can't say the ball is in his court when your last text was just a thank you and goodnight text. Sheesh. There's nothing wrong with sending a little text to say "just saying hi and hope all is well...." If he ignores it or sends back a response "I'm good, thanks..." and doesn't keep the conversation going, you'll have your answer. This right here!! I think about how she was ready to be done with him and then he set up another date...Voila!! So his lack of contact peaked your interest. If he would've contacted you before you might think he was clingy or rushing things...plus having things to talk about while actually on the date. Go have fun on the date!
Miss Peach Posted June 3, 2016 Posted June 3, 2016 I tend to give these guys a week just because there are so many rule books out there that I realize men don't know what to think or do. If they don't ask me out again I am done. It doesn't mean you can't text him again. There's no shame in initiating a text when it's "not your turn". Just don't initiate too many more after that... unless he initiates some. I totally disagree with this unless you want to get into chasing him. IME that usually attracts either guys that I have to take the lead with or makes guys with a low interest in me think they can get something easily. Personally OP, I would leave it be. He knows where you are and, as you say the ball's in his court. Let him do the chasing, guys appreciate you more if they have to do the heavy lifting. Totally agree with this. The guys who were interested in me seemed to know this and do it. I've run into a few who said they didn't follow up because they weren't sure of my interest but as I got to know them I found there were a lot of issues there. Just depends on what you want. 2
katiegrl Posted June 3, 2016 Posted June 3, 2016 (edited) He contacted me yesterday to ask me out again. I guess he is one of those guys that think the 3 day rule is an obligation... Is this "rule" written in some book or something? Where did this rule come from and when? I have never had a guy use that "rule" with me. If he was interested, he would call soon after the date or meeting me (the next day) to ask me out again. If he wasn't, then I would most likely never here from him again which was fine by me cuz I wasn't into him either. Edited June 3, 2016 by katiegrl
Author Sweetgirl28 Posted June 14, 2016 Author Posted June 14, 2016 I don't know where that "rule" came from... I just found it on Google. Date#2 went even better than #1. We ended up spending almost all day together... But he was too shy to kiss me. No big deal. Except that he is playing his 3 day rule game again. Like he texted me right after the date and then again 3 days later. Do men ever grow up?
tinkerbell16 Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 I don't know where that "rule" came from... I just found it on Google. Date#2 went even better than #1. We ended up spending almost all day together... But he was too shy to kiss me. No big deal. Except that he is playing his 3 day rule game again. Like he texted me right after the date and then again 3 days later. Do men ever grow up? Set your expectations NOW not later. If it bothers you address it right away. Ask him why he waits to text you, evaluate his response and determine if you are comfortable moving forward. If he is interested he will be want to make you happy if he isn't he won't and guess what? That will help you from wasting your time. 1
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